Through the Silence
by Kitty Faerie
Summary: I'm the quiet type. I'm the kid who can go all day without talking. Hello, World. My name is Mathew Williams and I have Selective Mutism. But now "the most awesome dude on Earth" wants to help me get my voice back. AU; Human names used; PruCan
1. Ruby Red Awesome

_Here is it! It's the PruCan fic I won't shut up about! Whoo! I won't be updating as often as I do my other fics, though. I'm sorry, guys, but I have midterms this week along with a bunch of other things going on. I'll try to keep this updating once a week. _

_This is a little serious. Selective Mutism is a real disease that many children suffer. I hope that I can teach you a little about it while you enjoy a nicestory :)_

**Warnings: Yaoi (boy/boy), Swearing, sexual themes, adult themes, some blood (maybe), Medical stuff.  
Pairings: Prussia/Canada. And being myself, I'll probably sneak in some USUK x3  
Other: This is a high school AU. Al and Mattie are twins. Most characters are seniors in high school unless stated other wise**

_Okay that's about it. Enjoy! And do me a favor and review! I'd love to hear what you have to say!_

* * *

I'm the quiet type. I'm the kid who can go all day without speaking and not feel weird or as though I need to get something off my chest. I'm not sure exactly why that is. I guess it's just my personality... Maybe. I've never liked to talk much. I'm a kid of few words... Or something. No one really ever noticed that I didn't talk much. My brother tended to hold the spotlight and I didn't really mind. As long as it wasn't on me, I was fine.

I'm the quiet type. I'm the kid who can go all day without speaking and not feel weird or as though I need to get something off my chest. I do know why that is, though.

Hello, world. My name is Mathew Williams. And I am a selective mute.

Being a selective mute does not mean that I am shouting "Screw you world! I'm not going to talk and no one can make me!" No, it's more that I literally cannot speak. I'll open my mouth and try to talk, but nothing comes out. I'll form the words in my head and try and try to get something out, but it never does. And I must look pretty silly trying to speak when nothing comes out.

I could say that I don't know why I don't talk. But I do. Ever since she died, I stopped. Everything stopped. My brother and I went to live with my aunt in New York city. She died a few month ago. Even though we lived with her for six years, I still didn't know her very well. She was hardly home. She was really nice to us, but didn't spend much time trying to get to know us.

We inherited a small sum of money and bought an apartment in the city. We go to school and work also. It's kind of a sad life, but I'm fine with it. My brother, Alfred, is really nice. He doesn't try to make me talk and he really understands me. With just a look, he can tell if I'm sick or in pain or something. We might be twins, but I guess three minutes does make a big difference. He really is that protective older brother.

I never really thought about talking again. I was not concerned with speaking or trying to get my voice back. The thought didn't cross my mind very often. Maybe before I fell asleep when everything was quiet, but not much more than that. It wasn't until I met the "most awesome dude on Earth" that I began to think of speaking again. He told me he would get my voice back. I didn't believe him.

* * *

My brother and I work at a convenience store in downtown New York. It's low pay, but the boss is nice and gives us bonuses around holidays so we can buy each other presents.

It's late August and I am stocking the shelves in the back of the store. I am the shelf stocker. My brother runs the cash register. He has great people skills. Often I find him talking with customers for hours on end on a slow day. They're usually his friends. He has a lot of friends. They're nice... I guess. They just don't understand me. Alfred always tries to get me involved in activities with his friends, but is usually forced to give up. It's not that they don't like me. It's just that I'm... different.

I hear the bell on the door ding a couple of times as someone comes through the door. I look up, curious as to who it is, but I can't see the person above the shelves. I see a flash of white, but quickly return to stocking the shelves. I'm putting soups away. The big name brands go on the third to top shelf so people can see them easier. The off brands get grouped around them. I'm so focused on putting the soups away correctly, I don't notice him standing behind me.

"Excuse me," he asks. It's a kind voice, but it startles my anyway. I drop the can I was holding and watch as it rolls over to someone's foot. I look up and am meet with bright red eyes. Seriously. Red eyes.

"Sorry about that," the red eyed man apologizes as he bends down to pick up the soup. "I didn't mean to scare you. I was just wondering where the soup was. But I guess I found it. How awesome is that? I am totally physic or something awesome like that!" He hands me the can, apparently an off brand veggie soup. I timidly take it back and place it on the shelf.

He bends down next to me and starts thumbing through the cans. Our hands touch for the briefest of moments, but I yank mine back and begin to fiddle with my shoelaces.

"Alright. Chicken noodle or beef?" he turns to me and asks. I look at him shocked for a moment. It takes me a while to realize that he wants my input on what soup he should buy. I pause for a moment before pointing to the chicken noodle. He shoots me a bright smile and stands up.

"Thanks! Yeah, chicken noodle is awesome isn't it?" He asks. I pause and nod a little. He looks down at me and I squirm under his gaze. "You don't talk do you?" he asks. My heart jumps at the sudden question. I blush and look down, embarrassed at my fault. "Hey, that's awesome by me," he says, "I don't care. You must be Mathew Williams. I'm Gilbert, by the way. We go to school together, but I'm so awesome you probably knew that." Actually I didn't. He flashes me a smile. "We should hang sometime," he tells me before walking off to go buy his soup.

I get up and just stand there for a moment. Someone actually talked to me! He seemed pretty nice, too! I was invisible to everyone else, but he of all people talked to me. I wonder if he thought I was weird for not talking. He seemed cool about it, but you can never tell what people are thinking.

I stayed back until I heard the bell ding and I knew he was gone. I came out to the front as Alfred locked the register. Glancing at the clock, I notice that it's time to go home. Sometimes the day just drags on, but today it went by quickly. My brother looks up and smiles at me.

"Hey! Did you meet Gilbert?" he asks. I nod, curious as to how he knows him. "He's a pretty cool dude, isn't he? He's a buddy from school. Anyway, it's time to go. You go on without me. I've gotta give boss-man here the keys after locking up." I nod and go to the back to grab my things. I come out and walk right out of the store.

The hot air hits me and almost takes my breath away. Being August, it's pretty hot here in New York. The store was a little chilly today, but I didn't mind. I tend to prefer cold to hot. My brother disagrees. We're really close, but we have differing opinions often.

As I walk down the streets, I can't get Gilbert out of my head. He was so nice, but I bet he thinks I'm weird just like the rest of Alfred's friends. I wonder why I hadn't met him before. Maybe they had just become friends a little while ago.

He did seem a little odd, though. I mean, he didn't look like a drug dealer or a bad person or anything. He just _looked _odd. His hair is bright white. I'm not even kidding. White. Maybe it was a disease or something. But his eyes were blood red as well. Well, 'blood' makes him seem bad. I liked calling it ruby. Yes, he has ruby red eyes. They're pretty, though. I wish just for a split second that I could tell him that myself.

I guess I'm thinking too much about things as I find myself in an area I had never been before. I stop and look around wondering where I am. No one is around. I took a wrong turn somewhere and now I'm lost! Great!

I hear the honk of a horn and the buzz of an engine. I look in front of me and find myself standing in the middle of the street, a truck zooming towards me. I open my mouth to scream, but I can't speak. I try to run, but my legs are glued to the spot.

There's a shout and a force slams me so hard, I am forced to shut my eyes. I fly through the air for what feels like an hour before hitting my head against cement. There's no pain, though. I try to open my eyes just a little bit, but my eyelids are suddenly so heavy. I see a familiar flash of white before completely losing my senses.


	2. The Awesome Promise

_Here's the next chapter. You're lucky I got it out before midterms tomorrow!_

_Thank you all for reviewing and giving me your constructive criticism. You guys all seem like I'm going to stab you with a spork or something for pointing out my mistakes. Don't be scared! x3 I love it when people do that! So thank you all so much! I went back and fixed them-or at least most of them. Just a note: I'm such an idiot I put that they lived with their aunt for 16 years. No, it was 6. I fixed it. Dx_

_Alright, next chapter now~!_

* * *

I begin to wake up after I don't know how long. Pain comes back in a rush filling me with agony. My head hurts. Nothing else, really. Just my head. My eye lids are still heavy and I can't muster the strength to open them. I am laying in a bed under a really warm blanket. Although it is August, it feels nice. I wonder for a moment where I am. I shift a little feeling the blanket. It feels like my favorite quilt. I'm at home? But last time I checked I was at the store.

I finally set my mind to opening my eyes. They crack open and a bit of pain comes. Everything is blurry and I can't see anything right. I blink a few times and open my eyes all the way. I am, in fact, in my room. The ugly walls are the tell-tale sign. Alfred and I tried to make the best of them, but we could never get the wine and beer stains out of them. And we aren't allowed to paint over them. Yeah? Well, I don't think beer and wine stains are allowed either! Oh well, it's none of my business.

I turn my head to the side and glance at the clock. It's nine fifteen in the morning. The morning? But the store closes at seven. Looking up, I notice that the blinds are shut, something that strikes me as odd. We never shut the blinds. There's no reason to; we get up at seven every morning. But for the first time, I can see the sunlight struggling against the shades to get into the room. The small bedroom looks kind of pretty like this. It's nice and I bask in the comfort for a few minutes, of course trying to ignore the pain as best I can.

Before long, the door creeks open and a worried looking Alfred enters. He pushes the door closed behind him, but it comes back open with a creek. Ignoring it, he walks over to his bed. I can't quite see what he's doing as the nightstand blocks my view. We went for the cheapest options as far as furniture. We didn't get a matching bed set, so the nightstand is a foot taller than the bed!

Finally he begins to walk over to my own twin bed. We make eye contact and I try to smile as best as I can. He does a double take before rushing over to the bed. "Mattie? You're awake?" he asks me although I don't reply, "Oh, thank God! I'm so happy you're awake, dude! You can't scare me like that!"

I smile, trying to understand what he means. Scare him? What did I do? Alfred was hardly ever scared. Once, a few years ago, I almost drowned at the local pool. He told me he was really scared and to "never scare him like that again." Apparently I broke my promise, but I don't remember how I did that.

"Does it hurt?" he asks me, "Nothing's broken, right?" I shake my head, but make a face to tell him that, yes, it does hurt. He frowns. "I'll get you something for the pain." Remember what I said about Alfred always understanding? I didn't lie; he always understands. When I was little, I fell off the monkey bars at the playground. I think I was about twelve or something. I just know that I was at the point where I didn't talk anymore. I didn't cry or yell, but he still knew that something was wrong. He found the bloody cut under my shirt and patched it up.

When he comes back, he's holding a glass of water and two pills. I always hated taking pills, but never really complained. I guess it's hard to complain when you don't talk. He helps me sit up and I almost let out a yelp of pain. I flop back against the pillows and take the glass of water from him. I throw the pills in my mouth and slurp the water down. I sit for a moment somehow hoping that the pain would poof! and go away.

"It'll take a little while for the pills to work," Alfred says again reading my mind. I sigh and settle back down. It's going to be a long wait. By now my head is throbbing from activity. My arm hurts a little also, but not as bad. I still find myself wondering what happened and why I hurt so much.

"It's a good thing Gilbert was there," he tells me, "You know we don't have insurance. Going to the hospital was out of the question. And if something was broken or worse we would be screwed." He gives me a very serious look. "And I might have lost my brother." He gives me a soft smile. We disagree on many things and, although you might not think so, we do have our fights. I might not speak, but I can be a jerk with a pen and paper. Well, kind of. Anyway, we're just really close. Tears begin to prick at my eyes as I think about how much I worried him.

"Don't cry," Alfred tells me reaching over to wipe the tears away, "You can't stress yourself out like that." His smile widens as he tries to get me to smile too. I don't. "Come on Mattie," he pleads, "I'm sure Gilbert's gonna want to see you smile. He's worried about you. If you don't smile, he's gonna think something's wrong."

It's then that it hits me. Gilbert? He said Gilbert? He might have said something about him a minute ago, but I thought it was just my imagination. I open my mouth to say something, but quickly close it as usual. My eyes widen as I silently beg him to tell me more about Gilbert. If he's hurt too, I'll never forgive myself.

Alfred, seeing the panic in my eyes, gives my shoulder a tight squeeze. "He's fine," he tells me in a kind voice, "We brought you home and got you into bed. He was real worried about you and stuff. He wanted to stay with you for a while, but I made him come eat. He then said that he banged his head as well and was feeling a little dizzy and tired and wanted to go to bed. So I let him have my bed."

I glance over, now able to see over the nightstand. Sure enough someone is laying in Alfred's bed, but is turned on the other side so I can't see his face. I let out a pleasant sigh of relief.

"Hey, how about we go into the living room? I'll make you something to eat. You must be hungry," Alfred suggests. I nod and he begins to pull back the covers. For the first time, I notice that I am in my favorite red and white PJs. Alfred gave them to me for Christmas a year or two ago. Last I checked, they were in the hamper to be washed. Alfred must have washed them special just for me.

I'm a little wobbly on my feet and a huge wave of dizziness washes over me as I try to stand. Alfred steadies me, though, and we make our way our of the small bedroom. Using his foot, Alfred pushes the door aside and we enter another small room.

The apartment isn't something that many people would actually want. But it's the only thing that two poor high school kids and afford. The furniture is all mismatched and the walls are painted a bland white with, of course, the occasional beer, wine, and you don't want to know stains. We were able to buy a small television a few weeks ago. It's second hand so the cable sometimes goes out. It also has those rabbit ear antennas. I think they're pretty cool, but Alfred always complains.

He settles me onto the couch and makes his way into the kitchen. The apartment is set up as an open floor plan. That means that wherever you are in the living room, you can also see the kitchen. Then there are two doors-one for the bathroom and one for the bedroom. Because of the way it's set up, I can see everything Alfred is doing in the kitchen.

Alfred and kitchens don't go well together. Once when we were living with our aunt, she had to stay at work late. I told him that we had money for pizza, but he wanted hamburgers. He was so stubborn, he pulled out the cookbook and began to make dinner. Unfortunately, we didn't have all the ingredients so he 'improvised.' This, in turn, caused a fire that almost burned down the building. I haven't let him cook since.

I watch him carefully as he grabs bowls out of the cabinet. _"Just stay away from the stove" _I think. Thankfully, he does and instead goes for the cereal. He pours two bowls of what I think is Frosted Flakes and brings them out to me. I let out a sigh of relief.

Alfred hands me a bowl and grabs the remote. We usually don't bother with cable as it hardly works, so he turns on the news. He puts the volume on low though. I'm not sure if it's so Gilbert can sleep or if it's because he wants to talk.

"You'll be feeling better soon," Alfred tells me, "Have the pain pills kicked in yet?" I nod. He asks me all this through monstrous bites of his cereal. I've hardly taken one bite and he's almost done! He was always like that. While he can't cook without setting something on fire, he can eat like nobody's business.

We sit there for a few minutes listening to the news and eating our cereal. It's not long before I hear the bedroom door creak open. It has to be the most annoying sound in the world; the sound of that door. We tried everything to get it to stop squeaking like that, but nothing works.

I glance up and see Gilbert-in my brother's PJs-yawning and stretching at the door. He spots us and gives a little wave before making his way over to the living room section of the apartment. He throws himself down onto the brown armchair that we picked up at a yard sale for thirty dollars. See why most of our furniture didn't match? We picked most of it up at yard sales.

"How're you doing?" Gilbert asks me, "Awesome, I hope. I'm pretty awesome myself, but I always am." He chuckles to himself and I smile a bit back remembering what Alfred told me about smiling to let him know I'm fine. Gilbert's voice comes out rough but nice and does not show any hint of tiredness.

"He's doing good," Alfred tells him, "He should be fine in a little while. He is _my_ brother after all."

"If your logic is correct then he should have a much thicker head," he shoots back. I almost drop my spoon. No one makes fun of my brother. I'd never do anything about it, of course, but Alfred would. When people make fun of him, he gets mad. When people make fun of me, all hell breaks loose.

But Alfred just chuckles. "I guess you're right," he laughs. I look up, but see his eyes filled with a little bit of irritation. He's probably just putting on an act for me. I wish he wouldn't. He tries to hide things from me as if I'm five. The truth is that, although I don't talk, I still have the brain of a seventeen year old. I like to watch sports-especially hockey-, I know all the swear words, and I can do really tough math problems.

We sit in silence for a little while before Alfred stands up and announces that he has to go to the store to tell the boss I won't be working for a week or so. I stand up in protest, but my head spins and my legs give out as I fall back onto the couch. Gilbert and Alfred run to my aid.

"Don't stand up like that, dude," Alfred tells me, "See? This is why you can't work for a little while. We'll be fine. You know the boss-man! He'll understand."

"Yeah," Gilbert agrees, "He'll be thankful that you didn't get killed 'cause no one wants that shitty job of yours." Alfred shoots Gilbert a glare before standing up. He walks into our room and comes back with a blanket. I don't protest as he wraps the blanket around me and tucks me into the couch. He then tells me he'll be back in about a half hour and heads out the door.

"I'd better get going too," Gilbert tells me. He disappears into my room. A few minutes later, he's dressed in the same clothes he wore yesterday. He stops by the couch and looks at me for a moment. I squirm under his gaze.

"Look, kid," he tells me, "I am awesome. We know that. And I am so awesome, I'm going to get your voice back. I'll help you, got it? Because you're pretty awesome too. Just not as awesome as me. Almost as awesome as me, but not quite." He pauses and his gaze intensifies. "I promise," he tells me in a solemn and eerie voice. I gulp.

He gives me a wink as he heads to the front door. He picks up his black and white backpack before opening the ugly brown door. Giving me a small wave he leaves and I am left alone in the empty apartment.

He told me he's going to get my voice back. He's a pretty interesting guy. He seems really nice although he does piss my brother off a lot. Still, I can't help but hope we meet again.

But about getting my voice back; I don't believe him.

* * *

_Uh-Oh! Alfred and Gilbert might be getting on each other's bad side, but Mattie seems really interested in the albino~!_

_Let's see... Next chapter? I dunno. I think we meet everyone's favoUrite Britt. I think x3_

_So review if you have the chance :D_


	3. For the Love of Maple & Awesome Pancakes

_New chapter~! My day of Midterm hell is over; just two easy ones tomorrow. Then a long weekend. Can't do anything Saturday (speech and debate turni) so I'm hoping that some of Sunday and most of Monday can be dedicated to this~!_

_Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews! Please keep it it; they make me feel so good! And by the way, Al and Mattie are 17. Pretty much everyone is 17-18. Just wanted to clear that up for the reviewer that asked ;)_

* * *

Gilbert's words echo in my head as I rest on the couch. He's going to get my voice back? But how? And why bother anyway? I'm just the silent, shy, invisible kid with a crappy home and a loud mouth brother. And Gilbert is... Well, awesome.

He probably has the biggest ego I've ever seen. He loves the word awesome and constantly uses it to describe himself. Others who are not him, he calls 'less than awesome.' Most people probably get pissed of by his attitude; my brother, I think, is one. But I am... Pleased. Happy? Intrigued? I don't know. But I find myself smiling knowing that someone called me awesome. Or, well, almost awesome. Me! Almost as awesome as someone who was supposedly awesome! I'm not making any sense now, am I? But I've never been almost awesome at anything. Except for hockey. I am really good at hockey. Well, I can beat Alfred at it.

We used to play hockey all the time even after I stopped talking. Alfred would always get aggravated when I would beat him, but he would be a, I don't know, _hoser _about it. He could beat me at almost everything else anyway. But hockey was my game. The feeling I got when I beat someone was indescribable.

I don't play hockey anymore. When Al and I had to get jobs, we didn't have time. It kind of stinks; I'd really love to play again. Alfred always tells me that if I want to play hockey again, I should join the school's team. He thinks I'm good enough to make the cut and maybe even start. I don't want to, though. There's too many people anyway. I don't even know how he knows I want to play hockey again. Maybe I should stop looking through all those hockey magazines at the store.

I must have fallen asleep because the door opening and closing startles me. I didn't think it would take such a short time for Al to go down to the store. Then again, if I did fall asleep it might just seem like a short time. Familiar footsteps cross the carpet with dull thumps.

"Hey Mattie. You awake?" Alfred asks. His voice is closer now. Of course I'm awake. My eyes are-Oh. I must have closed my eyes. I don't know! Everything just seems so confusing now! First there was Gilbert and his awesomeness and then there was hockey and now... Ugg! Slowly I open my eyes and look up at Alfred's worried expression. He gives me a soft smile.

"Boss-man says you don't have to work until Saturday," he tells me, "He also told me to tell you to feel better."

I smile and sit up to leave room for Alfred to sit down. The movement makes my head pound, but I try not to make a face. Al doesn't sit down, though, or even pick up the hint of pain in my expression. Instead he goes into the kitchen and pulls out a note pad. He stands at the counter for a moment jotting something down. I crane my neck to see what he's doing. He comes back into the living room and hands me the pad.

"We have to go school shopping," he tells me, "School starts in two days, remember?" My heart sinks. School? I... Don't like school.

I've never had many friends. Again, I'm the silent, shy kid. Alfred is really popular and outgoing and a lot of fun to be around, though. He's also really athletic. He's one of the captains of the football team and as made a lot of friends from that. I'm fine with him having friends and all. I mean, it would make me kind of a jerk if I didn't want him to have friends. It's just that when school starts, we become more distant. I turn invisible to him when school starts. I'm not trying to sound needy or anything, really! But when he realizes that his friends don't want to be around me, he gives up. I don't blame him; I would give up on myself too. I just wish we could stay closer during the school months.

I check over the list to be sure he has everything we need. Pens, pencils, binders, two calculators, and a few multisubject notebooks with built in folders. That's what our usual list is and that's exactly what he has written down. We can't afford all of the fancy notebooks with the nice designs or the $200 graphing calculators. We usually just settle for the plain colored multisubject notebooks. They're actually kind of nice. It reduces the amount of books the bullies slap out of my hands!

I do get bullied sometimes. Nothing bad, but there's a few people who I could live without. I don't tell Alfred that I get bullied. I can't. But I wouldn't even if I could.

I guess you could also say that I get good grades. I try to keep A's and B's. I'm not the smartest kid in the world, but I'm also not the dumbest. Teachers can't seem to figure me out, though. I mean, how can the kid who doesn't take still get good grades? It's the "not talking" part, I think. I have nothing better to do then make sure I know the material. No sports teams, no friends... I feel pretty silly feeling bad for myself when I'm sure people have it much worse.

"Alright," Alfred says as I had him back the list, "I'll be back soon." At this I jump up. He gives me a look. "You want to come?" I nod. "Is your head feeling better?" His eyebrows are raised as though he isn't going to believe me. Still, I nod. "Fine, then," he smiles, "Come on, dude. I want to hurry up!"

I grab the wallet on the counter and follow him out the door. It's not that I want to go shopping or anything. I mean, I don't hate shopping, but I also don't love it. It's just that I really want to get some fresh air and maybe clear my head.

* * *

The automatic doors slide open and we are greeted by a blast of cool air. Staples has their air conditioner turned all the way up, I see.

People are milling around, filling sharping carts with colorful school supplies. There are a bunch of little kids with their parents running around, begging for only the prettiest and coolest notebooks and folders. My heart lurches at the sight of a mother with her two young boys. I try to ignore them as I follow Alfred to the sale isles.

We browse through the plain colored notebooks and simple wooden pencils until our basket is almost full. We finish and begin walking to the registers. We are about two isles away from the checkout when Alfred just up and bolts taking our poor basket hostage. I follow him with my eyes as he almost knocks a poor unsuspecting blonde boy off his feet. I walk over to be greeted by said unsuspecting blonde boy yelling at my brother.

"You don't just jump someone in the middle of a store!" A familiar accented voice shouts. It's Arthur. We've known Arthur for as long as I can remember. We're pretty good friends, although he spends more time with Alfred than with me. From a distance, their personalities seem so different. But I know that they are actually pretty similar. For one, they are both pretty stubborn. And while Arthur might be the student body president, he was a bit of trouble in grade school.

"Aw, sorry Artie!" Alfred whines using the nickname he knows Arthur hates, "But you look so cute browsing through those nerd books."

Arthur's face flushes with embarrassment and anger. "Don't call me that," he says harshly, "And they're dictionaries; not 'nerd books,' you git!"

They argue back and forth still not noticing that I'm standing there. Alfred, though, is teasing more than arguing. He can be such a jerk sometimes. Especially with Arthur. I wonder for a moment why Arthur puts up with him. Then I remember he doesn't.

A moment later, Arthur turns to look at me. "Oh, Mathew," he greets, "I didn't see you there." Of course he didn't. But I smile and nod. I like Arthur-really, I do-it's just that he tends to be a little... Forgetful. He also doesn't call me 'Mattie.' I don't mind one way or another, but I think that it's interesting he doesn't call me it.

"Oh yeah," Alfred says remembering something, "Mattie almost got hit by a truck yesterday." His voice is so calm, I find myself wondering where the worry went. Then I wonder what in the world is wrong with Alfred! I turn to look at Arthur who looks like he's about to have a heart attack.

"Wha... What?" he stammers looking back and forth from me to Alfred.

"Yeah. It was almost pretty bad," Alfred tells him. "Gilbert was there, though. I guess that's good. He saved him." I can't help but notice the slight irritation that comes into Alfred's otherwise calm voice at the mention of Gilbert.

"Well... That's good," Arthur says finally able to regain his breath. "Are you alright?" I nod. "Bloody hell, Alfred. You can't just go around saying stuff like that. I almost had a bloody stroke!"

"You sound like and old dude, dude!" Alfred laughs much at Arthur's annoyance, "Sorry, Artie. But I just thought that you should know. Right, Mattie?" I look at Alfred and nod halfheartedly. He doesn't notice.

I am really starting to get a bit dizzy. My head is pounding and I really want to go home and take some pills for the pain. It'll be about five hours by the time we get home if we leave now. It should be safe to take some more. Al and Arthur are chatting, though, and I don't want to bother them. I shift from foot to foot nervously, willing them to stop talking.

Finally, Arthur turns around and looks at me. He gives me a confused and worried look. I blush and glance away. "You look rather pale, Mathew," he tells me. "Maybe you should go home and lie down." Alfred also turns to look at me.

"Oh yeah, Mattie," he exclaims, "We really should get you home. He hit his head pretty hard. Does it hurt?"

"He hit his head and you take him shopping" Arthur yells. As much as I like the British boy, I wish he wouldn't yell. The yelling makes my head hurt worse.

"He wanted to go," Alfred shrugs, "Who am I to deny him the pleasure of shopping with his big bro?"

"You are an idiot!" Arthur yells throwing his hands up in the air. "Take Mathew home and get him to bed! Make him some hot soup. Do you want my recipe?"

Alfred makes a face and I feel my stomach twist. Arthur's cooking is horrible! And Alfred isn't allowed in the kitchen! Oh for the love of maple and all that is pancakes; please say 'no!'

Thankfully, Alfred shakes his head and makes a gagging gesture. "Arthur, I don't want to kill him," he whines with a teasing smile. Arthur smacks him on the arm. His cooking is bad, but you should tell him so. He gets really angry.

"Feel better, Mathew," he tells me before waving us off. He doesn't leave his spot and instead turns back to the shelf. He's telling us in his "proper British way" to get the heck out. Alfred and I obey as we head over to the register. We buy our items and leave the store.

The August air worsens my headache. It's so hot outside. Plus, it's humid and that just makes it worse. Alfred and I continue down the streets. We don't have a car or anything. Thankfully, we can just walk everywhere in New York. My head hurts and I sway a little nearly pushing Alfred off the sidewalk.

"Woah! Steady there, dude," Alfred exclaims pausing to steady me. "We're about a block away. Just make it until then." I nod feeling pretty embarrassed.

We do make it home and I go straight to bed. I am so tired, but my mind does feel just a little clearer. I don't have time to really see as I fall asleep before I can even think. I really just hope these two days go by slowly so I don't have to go back to school.

* * *

_I tried not to make Mattie sound suicidal or something. I know he is in a whole bunch of other fics, but he's really not the depressed cutter in this fic. He's just confused... And quiet x3_

_I think my favorite line is "For the love of maple and all that is pancakes; please say 'no!'" Lol I came up with that after my Geometry midterm today x3  
_

_*Hoser: In CANADA x3 Hosers are generally assholes or sore losers. I think I heard something about the "ancient Canadians (LOL)" getting hosed down if they lost a hockey game. That's where the term comes from (i think...)_

_So, please review if you have the chance. They make me feel and special inside :D_


	4. Seeing Awesome

_Yay an update! Sorry for the wait. Midterms suck, don't they~! Thank you for the wonderful reviews~! And for a better explination of the word 'hoser' check the reviews~! Thanks for pointing that out! You rock!_

* * *

Those two days end up going by very quickly, much to my annoyance. Before I know it, our alarm is going off at six in the morning to get us up for school. I trudged around all morning, almost wishing I would go back in time... Or at least, back to bed. Alfred got a little annoyed at me because we almost missed the bus. No, we don't have a car. We have bikes, but we usually don't take those to school.

And now here we are standing in front of the brick prison I call hell-I mean school. I glare at the building and I swear I can see it snickering at me. Okay, that might be going a little too far. I am all alone, again, as Alfred has run off to go meet up with his friends. I wander around the halls looking for my locker. Finally I find it. It's blue just like all the other senior and freshman lockers. The senior and freshman lockers are blue; the junior and sophomore lockers are white. Yay chiasmus!

I try the combination and to my surprise, it actually works! Now, that doesn't happen every year. It's usually a fight to the death with these rusty old things.

Just as I finish setting the locker up and putting my backpack away, the bell rings. The vice principal comes over the loud speaker to remind us of the assembly taking place in the auditorium in ten minutes. I follow the sea of people that suddenly appear to the assembly. Second period is to follow (we always miss first period on the first day) so I make sure to bring my supplies.

This assembly never has much of a point to it, at least in my opnion. They give you directions, but that usually is directed towards the freshmen. Even then, most freshmen know their way around from touring the school when they were in middle school. So, the directions are really just for the new kids and there aren't many of those. They tell you the lunch menu, but there's one in the front office and on the school's website. Besides, who would want to eat the school lunch? The lunches here are like throw up on a stick. And then there's the talk about tradition and honor and things they _have_ to know no one cares about.

Finally, they dismiss us. We have ten minutes to get to second period to leave enough time for the new kids who may or may not loose their way. I follow the sea of people out of the auditorium and find myself in a hallway. I check my schedule. I have second period World History. I smile a little. I like History. I was always just a little good at it.

I know exactly where the room is, so I make my way there. Most kids are milling around wasting time. They'll probably get to class and claim that they got lost-even the seniors. The teachers won't care, though. They don't want to be back in school any more than I do.

I round the last corner and collide with something solid. I know I didn't misjudge how far the wall went and the slight smell of cologne tells me that I bumped into a person. He turns around and looks me dead in the eyes. I really just want to die now. To my horror, this person is Antonio Fernandez Carriedo, the very kid who has been picking on me since grade school. I jump back with a small gasp. Antonio grins this creepy smile and I don't know if he's going to rape me or beat me or what.

"Ah, Mattie. Welcome back," he says. I shudder and glance behind him. Thankfully, none of his 'friends' are with him. Unfortunately, there's no one around; not a teacher or student. Oh maple! I try to nod an apology and begin to walk away when he grabs my shirt and pulls me back.

"Come on, Matt," he says in a false pleading voice, "Just say 'sorry' and you can go." I shake my head in defiance as tears prick at my eyes. I wish the tears would go away. I am always so sensitive. I cry at everything! Antonio just grins and slaps the books out of my hands. They crash to the ground with a thud and scatter everywhere. I glance around praying that someone will help me. Some people actually make an appearance. They just pass by, though. They don't even look at us.

"Come on," Antonio says again, "Or do I have to make you?" He pulls his hand back and punches me in the arm. I let out a gasp of pain as the pressure spreads through my body. This is how they always get me. They try to make me speak and then hit me when I don't. Tears stream down my cheeks. This is why I hate school.

Antonio is about to hit me again and I close my eyes to brace myself for the pain. "Stop!" Someone shouts. Antonio's grip loosens, but my feet are still no on the ground and I refuse to open my eyes. I hear two people arguing, but I can't make out what they are saying. I don't know why I can't understand them. I think that my mind has just blocked out everything at this point. Soon Antonio releases me, but I fall the ground as I wasn't prepared for the sudden release.

I am even more surprised when I feel myself being lifted into someone's strong arms. "Wake up, Mattie," the voice tells me. I open my eyes upon the command although I didn't actually pass out. Ruby red flashes back at me and I gasp in surprise.

"Hey, kid," Gilbert greets me, "Long time no seeing awesome me, huh? I missed you. Bet you missed me too. I don't blame you, but awesome can't be two places at once. Although I would much rather have been with you. My brother is so boring and un-awesome." I smile a little. "Now let's get you to class." He puts me down and helps me gather my books. I see him smile at my schedule.

"We have second period together," he tells me, "Actually we have a lot of classes together. Awesome, huh? Now you can see awesome every day!"

I laugh a little and put my schedule back into my notebook. Together, we walk down the hallway and find our way to the World History room. Gilbert insists on holding my hand. He says that he wants everyone to know that I'm with him. He says that awesome doesn't let others get beat up. I smile at this.

Alfred and I almost never have classes together. It's partly because I'm just extremely unlucky and also because the school knows we're twins. They explained it a few times before, but I forget the real reason as to why they don't let us be in the same class. I think it has something to do with meeting new people and stuff. I think it's because they believe in twin telepathy. It does exist to an extent. Alfred always knows when I'm in pain. But we can't share answers on tests or anything.

Gilbert leads me to the room and only then does he let go of my hand. I walk up to the teacher, a pretty woman who looks no older than twenty-five. Her eyes are hazel-ish blue and her hair is long and chestnut brown. She smiles at me as I approach her desk. I hand her "The Note."

"The Note" is basically an explanation written by my brother on why I don't speak. Well, mostly why. It doesn't say exactly what happened. She takes it from me gently and reads it over. I can almost hear her reading it in her head.

_Dear Mr. or Mrs. or Miss Teacher-Person-Dude _(Can you tell that Alfred wrote this?)_,_

_Hey! My name is Alfred F. Jones. The dude who just gave you the note is Mathew Williams, my brother. I'm writing this on his behalf. See, he doesn't talk. Like, ever. He's got this thing called 'Selective Mutism.' If you don't know about it, you might want to look it up. It's hard to understand sometimes. Mattie hasn't been able to get over this thing that happened a bunch of years ago. And I'm the only family he's got. So, please don't push him to talk. Because it will just make him sad. And if he gets sad, I will sue you.  
So have fun with him 'cause he's really nice and stuff! And he's smart. So bye!_

_Your Hero,_  
_Alfred F. Jones_

Yes, I memorized it. Sometimes I will just pull it out and look at it. I wonder why I don't speak; why I can't speak. Anyway, the teacher just hands me back the note and smiles. "Don't worry, Mathew," she says, "I'll make sure you feel nice and comfortable. Why don't you go take a seat? Class will be starting soon. Sit wherever you'd like." I smile back at her and nod. She seems like a nice woman.

Gilbert, of course, if waving me over and pointing to the seat next to him. I take the hint and make my way over to him. He's sitting in the second row from the desk and the third row from the door. I take a seat in the second row from the desk and the fourth row from the door. Other kids are scattered all around. Some I know, some I have never met before.

Finally, the bells rings and the teacher stands up. She smiles at us-all twenty two of us. "Welcome to World History, class!" She says with a chipper voice, "I'm Miss. Kantrain, but you can just call me Miss. K. I hope you will all have a wonderful year. So, let's get right to business." She walks back to her desk and pulls out a Red Sox cap. A Red Sox cap in New York? Now, I don't follow baseball, but I know that's a taboo around here.

"Inside this hat are a bunch of pieces of paper with country's names," she explains, "Here's the deal. You are going to pick out a country and you will 'be' that country for the remainder of the school year. There is no trading and there is no redraws. We will do various projects with your countries. These will range from reports to 'world meetings' to culture days. So if you get a country you know nothing about, then the Internet will become your best friend." Miss. K smiles. "Alright? Now, let's get started!"

Miss. K walks around the room. People reach into the cap and pull out their countries. Some smile with delight while others look as though they have never seen the assortment of letters before. She comes to Gilbert and he reaches in. He pulls his hand out and unfolds a paper. I lean over to see what it says. **Prussia** is written on it in bold letters. Miss. K smiles.

"I was hoping someone would get Prussia," she says, "It doesn't exist anymore, but it will be interesting to learn about it. Besides, Prussia played an important role in the history of the world." She then continues on down the row.

"Hell yeah!" Gilbert smiles and turns to me. "See that? I probably got the most awesome country ever!" I smile a bit. If I could talk, I would point out that Prussia is not a country anymore so it must not be that awesome. Then again, maybe I wouldn't. Gilbert looks really cool when he's smiling that wry smile of his.

Finally, Miss. K makes her way to me. I reach in and pull out my own slip of paper. **Canada** is written on it with the same handwriting. "Ah, Canada," she smiles, "That's an interesting country. I think it suits you." I smile back as she walks away. Canada, huh? That might not be so bad.

Miss. K finishes walking around the class and goes back to the front. She then asks us to say the countries that we got. Prussia answers for me and Miss. K lets him. There's a lot of teachers who would get mad when others would answer for me. Some people look confused at the word "Canada." One person even asks "Who?" I just shrug it off, though. An invisible country for an invisible kid. That works.

Class ends and I find Gilbert at my side again. We walk to Chemistry together. Our schedules are so close together it's amazing. The only difference is that I have French while he has German and I have gym while he has health. Everything else is together.

"Hey, Mattie?" he asks me in study hall fourth period. I look over at him from my Chem book. We got homework on the very first day. At least the teacher was nice. He, too, understood my situation and allowed Gilbert to speak for me. "I was thinking about what happened with Antonio... You get bullied a lot, don't you?"

I pause, but eventually nod.

"That's not going to happen anymore," he tells me, "It's not awesome. You aren't going to get bullied as long as I'm around. Antonio is one of my friends. I'll talk to him. He's going to stop picking on you, alright?" I nod. For the first time, I realize that someone actually cares about me. It feels nice to know that he really cares and wants me to be safe.

We don't talk for the rest of the period. There's really nothing to say. I can't focus on my chemistry, though. I keep thinking about Gilbert. I think... I have feeling for him. Like a crush or something. But how could I? He's a guy and I'm a guy. There's no way he would ever return my feelings... Not that I really have them! Or do I? I don't know! I'm so confused. But every time he looks at me with those Ruby Red eyes, my heart skips a beat.

Oh for the love of maple! I have no clue what to do! But, at least, I have a friend. And I realize that I've never had a friend before. Maybe it isn't so bad after all.

* * *

_Go Red Sox x3 Lol I had to put that in there. I also had to throw in chiasmus. That's basically a system of ABBA. So Blue White White Blue. See? _

_Hopefully I'll find more time to write. But I am NOT giving up on this story. I feel bad the updates are so spaced out, but this will be updated. Mkay? x3_

_And yes, I am going to tackle something that I know a lot of fics don't: Mattie struggling with the fact that he might be gay. It adds to the drama ;)_

_So review if you have the chance~! It makes me so happy and stuff :D_


	5. Awesome to the Rescue

_New chapter~! Yay~! Midterms are over and all is right with the world. I even got a 100 on my history exam THANKS HETALIA~!_

_Anyway, I wanted to respond to a few reviews before I start this chapter. First, I'm sorry for making Antonio the bully D: But, trust me, there is a method to my madness~! I do love Antonio, I promise~!_

Also because I'm American I never thought about other countries having a different period schedul. I mean, that would mean I had to think of others x3 (I'm horrible, I know). But this story is set in New York, so there are 8 periods plus lunch. School goes from 7:50am-2:45pm. Not every school is this way, but it's what my school does, so I went with it x3

And now onto the chapter~!

* * *

School has been in session for a little over two months. Gilbert and I are becoming really good friends. It's amazing, really, how we went from not knowing each other to being great friends so quickly. Alfred doesn't like Gil much and makes sure to let me know on a few occasions, but it's alright. Sometimes, it's nice to know I'm defying my brother in a way. He has never prevented me from seeing Gilbert, though. Although, I do know that he really couldn't do much about it. He might be a little older than me, but that's only by a few minutes and he's my brother, not my guardian. But, that's just me being a little difficult.

Antonio hasn't bothered me either. I never actually saw Gilbert talk to him, but I am under the impression that he did and it worked. Now, he doesn't go out of his way to be nice to me or anything. He just ignores me and I ignore him.

For the most part, the teachers are very nice. Most are completely understanding of my 'disability' and accept that I cannot and will not talk. Gilbert helps me out in class when I'm in a situation where I need to speak.

But there is one teacher who I swear to maple is from the depths of hell. She's mean and evil and a bad person. Well, I don't know if she's a bad person. I mean, she could be saving puppies and volunteering at children's hospitals for all I know. But at school, she's a which.

She came to our class on the first day of November. Our old psychology teacher had heart problems and had to leave the school, so they got a new teacher. Mrs. Plum, apparently, had recently lost her husband and returned to teaching as a way to make money for herself. She was old. By that, I mean that she was dead set in the ways of old. I know better than anyone that psychology had changed over the years.

One good example is the fact that Selective Mutism was once called Elective Mutism meaning that the child really was saying "Screw you, world. I'm not going to talk." But over the years, psychologists had learned that the children really could not talk. They weren't really choosing not to. Something inside them prevented it. But Mrs. Plum was set in her ways and would not hear me out.

The second day of November, I bring her 'The Note.' She is sitting at her desk leafing through a book before class. She glances up at me with a slight hint of annoyance on her face as though she was angry I had disturbed her. She looked back down at her book and gestured for me to begin to speak. I blush and tap her on the shoulder. She looks back up at me, this time with a definite glare. I hand her the note and she snatches it out of my hands.

I watch for a moment as her eyes dart around the paper. She raises her eyebrows at a few parts and I find myself wondering if maybe I should have given her a less... 'rude' copy. She finishes reading and hands me 'The Note' with a mean look on her face.

"You can talk just fine," she growls, "I expect you to talk in this class. Now go take your seat. Class is going to talk. Ha! Selective Mutism? That's a joke."

I really don't know what to do. I lean on my right foot as though I am going to walk away, but pause and shift back to my left foot. Hot tears appear before I can even stop them. I quickly wipe them away, but she doesn't see. I decide to give up and go take my seat behind Gilbert. I know my face is flushed and he obviously notices it as he gives me a look of concern.

"What's up, Birdie?" he asks. Gilbert gave me the nickname 'Birdie' after his fascination with birds. I'm still a little confused at the nickname. I mean, I don't think I have much in common with a bird, but whatever floats his boat and doesn't sink mine is fine with me.

But now the cute nickname doesn't make me feel any better. I simply shake my head and stare at the plastic desk willing the tears to stay away. I can tell his body is still twisted around and he is staring at me intently. I could practically see his bright red eyes burning into the top of my head. This mental picture forced me to look back up and meet his gaze. Again I shake my head.

"She didn't yell at you, did she?" Gilbert asks his eyes beginning to narrow. I pause wondering if I should tell him the truth. In the end, I nod. Gilbert gasps. "You've got to be kidding! How could she yell at you! You obviously have a problem and she's going to ignore it? Goddam bitch!" I can see Gilbert fuming. His eyes narrow and his face flushes ever so slightly in anger. I can tell that he is not a happy camper. But I just want to ignore it, so I pull out my notebook and pretend to study something. Gilbert sighs and pats me on the hand. My face burns. "It'll be alright," he tells me, "'Cause I'm awesome." I nod awkwardly as the bell rings and Mrs. Plum rises from her seat.

"Settle down," she tells the class. Her voice is forceful and the class quiets immediately. I swear you can hear a pin drop. "We will go around the room and you will tell me your name, your grade, and... You're favorite sport." She looks right at me. I can tell she's trying to be 'fun' with her favorite sport thing, but all I can see is meanness in her eyes.

Everyone takes their turns telling us their favorite sports and their names and grades, although I already know who most people are. Finally, it is Gilbert's turn.

"I'm Gilbert Beilschmidt," Gilbert tells the class. I can't see his face as I sit behind him, but from the harshness in his voice I assume he is glaring daggers at the teacher. "I'm a senior and my favorite sport is fencing." It's true. Gilbert never took lessons or anything, but he loves to watch it on TV. "It's two dudes fighting with swords... Legally! It's almost as awesome as me!" he once told me.

Mrs. Plum nods and looks to me. Oh maple, this is it. I look at her and then back at the desk. I can feel everyone looking at me-staring at me-but I don't look up. "Well...?" Mrs. Plum asks coldly. I remain silent. My face is burning and I feel dizzy. Is it possible to faint from embarrassment? Oh maple I hope not! I don't need to faint on top of this.

I feel a hand on mine and look up just enough to see Gilbert smiling at me. But it's a grim smile that tells me he's going to take matters into his own hands. He turns around and looks right at the teacher.

"His name is Mathew Williams," Gilbert tells her, "He's a senior and his favorite sport is hockey. I know 'cause he watches it every Saturday. It's almost as awesome as fencing." He turns back around and flashes me a smile. I just return to staring at the desk knowing what is coming.

"Mr. Beilschmidt!" Mrs. Plum exclaims, "Do not speak for Mathew. He can tell me himself."

"Actually, he can't," Gilbert tells her harshly. The temperature in the room drops a few degrees, "He has Selective Mutism and he cannot talk. He doesn't talk to me or his brother or anyone. And he surely isn't going to start just for a bitch like you."

Mrs. Plum turns red, not purple like I thought she would. "Mr. Beilschimidt! You will not use that language in my class! Get out now and wait in the hallway until the end of class!" Mrs. Plum shouts. Gilbert scoffs, but gets up.

"Don't worry, Mattie," he tells me, "I'll get this all worked out." He gives me a wink as he leaves the room. Only, he doesn't stop in the hall. Leaning over the desk, I see him walk down the hall and take a right down the hallway.

Mrs. Plum sees him go, but does not stop him. Sighing, she turns back to me and glares. "Now, how about you introduce yourself to the class yourself?" she asks. I just stare back blankly at her. Her eyes narrow. "Mr. Williams, please introduce yourself to the class," she commands.

I don't know what to do. I realize that a bunch of people who I hardly know are staring at me. The dizziness returns as my face reverts to a deep blush. I begin to use my hands to gesture, trying to convey my message. I cross my fingers and bring them to my lips to show her that I don't talk. Her eyebrow raises.

"Talk like a normal person," she says forcefully. I begin to make more frantic gestures. When she doesn't say anything and her glare deepens, I begin to flail wildly. I move my arms up and down as though I am drowning or something. Of course, no one in the class helps.

"Mathew Williams talk to the class," she yells. At this I burst into tears, the only noise escaping my lips a choking sound.

The rest of class drags on. Mrs. Plum continues to heckle me to speak. I continue crying hysterically and trying to get a grip on myself. None of the other kids stand up for me or even help. They just go back to reading or whispering or whatever they were doing before knowing that Mrs. Plum would keep this up until the end of class.

By the end of the class, she has threatened me with everything: a call home, detention, community service, suspension, expulsion. I bet she would have gone to deportation had the bell not rung. When it finally does, everyone jumps up and leaves. Being the last period of the day everyone is anxious to go home. By then, I have my head buried in my arms on the desk still crying. I don't know what to do. If I get up, I'll have to meet her eyes. But I can't stay there forever.

I hear footsteps enter the room. I look up slightly and through my blurred eyes see a glimpse of white hair. Gilbert is making his way over to me. I throw my head back into my arms. I don't want him to see me like this.

"Hey Birdie," he says. His voice his right next to my ear. I peer up and see that he is crouched by me. He stands up and gently picks me out of the seat. After a moment, I am standing right in front of him. Placing his hands on my shoulders, he pushes me to the door. He gestures to a man that is obviously from the office and gets me out of the room.

Once in the hallway, I burst into tears again. I guess the real reason why I'm crying is not because of Mrs. Plum. I think it's something that I've been struggling with for many years. I don't know why I don't talk-why I can't talk. I guess Mrs. Plum helped me see how frustrated I am with myself.

Gilbert pulls me into a hug. His body is stiff and ridged and I can tell he's never really comforted anyone before. He has a younger brother named Ludwig, but Gilbert has told me that Ludwig generally fends for himself. Although Ludwig is a year younger than Gilbert, he does the cooking and the cleaning. Gilbert has told me more than once that he is "Too awesome" to do those kinds of chores. Either way, I can't imagine Ludwig going to Gilbert for comfort at any age.

Still, the little comfort I get is enough. Gilbert pulls me away and wipes at my tears. "Now, stop crying, okay?" he asks, "It doesn't look awesome on you. You look better smiling." At this, I admit, a smile tugs at the sides of my mouth. "There you go! There's that awesome smile of yours! Now, let's go back in and get everything straightened out." He leans in and draws close to my ear. "We'll make sure that bitch gets what she deserves." He pulls back and smiles.

I think I'm about to hyperventilate when he stares at me for another moment and then leans in and pecks me on the forehead. I know, it's a simple gesture, but it's so out of character for him and so... So sweet! Even Alfred doesn't kiss me anymore. I guess we're passed the family huggy time stuff. My face goes red and I follow him into the room.

Mrs. Plum is as red as can be, but I can't tell if it's out of anger or embarrassment. I hope it's the later just because I don't want her yelling anymore. The man turns and greets us. He nods at Gilbert, but smiles at me.

"Hello," he says, "I'm Mr. Mitch. I'm the school guidance counselor. Gilbert here told me that you and Mrs. Plum had a misunderstanding. We've got it all straightened out."

"I'm sorry I pushed you, Mathew," Mrs. Plum says with fake kindness. I can tell it's fake. I bet Mr. Mitch can tell it's fake, but just doesn't want to deal with this any longer. "Things have changed since I was in a school teaching." She laughs awkwardly and the man follows. Mr. Mitch then takes his leave and rushes out of the room.

"Look, boys," Mrs. Plum says coldly, the kind expression gone, "I know you can talk, Mathew and you will. I'm not going to take this from you, understand?" Gilbert glares. I gulp. Gilbert says nothing, but drags me out of the room leaving Mrs. Plum by herself. I guess this is a good example of when silence is better than anything else.

"Fucking bitch," Gilbert swears when we're down the hall, "I'm going to fucking kill her. She does _not_ do that shit to you! I'm going to get her fired, I swear!" I just listen to him ramble on. Soon I find myself outside being led by Gilbert to his car.

"Hey Mattie!" a voice calls. We stop and turn around. Alfred is running after us. I can see his friends waiting for him in the background.

Finally, he catches up to us and smiles at me. I do notice that he sneaks in a glare at Gilbert. "Hey, I thought you caught the bus. Guess I was wrong," he greets, "Me and the guys are grabbing a bite to eat. I'll be home by nine, alright?" He pauses and thinks for a moment. "Do you have a ride home?"

I look up at Gilbert who nods. "Yeah. I'll take him home in my awesome car," Gilbert says proudly gesturing to the black car. I notice it has a bunch of scratches and there's a few dents. Alfred's face wavers.

"Are you sure? I don't want it to be too much trouble?"

"It's fine. I _am_ awesome after all." Alfred scowls.

"Alright, just be careful, 'kay?" he asks, "I don't need my brother killed in that deathtrap of yours. I flinch at the word 'killed.' "See you later, then Mattie," Alfred says with a wave and a hop as he makes his way back to his friends.

Gilbert lets out a haughty laugh and pulls me over to his car. I give him a look. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that we're not going home.

"Wanna grab something to eat?" Gilbert asks. Do I really have a choice? I smile and nod. Who am I kidding? I would go anywhere with this boy! "Awesome!" Gilbert shouts, "We can go to this awesome Mexican place I know! It's awesome!" I nod excitedly. He could have said "hey, let's go eat dog" and I would still have been excited to go with him. A little repulsed, maybe, but I still would have gone.

It's amazing how this boy has absolutely captured my heart. It feels weird. We're just friends, right? I mean, if I felt anything else, then I would be gay, right? I don't think I'm gay. But the way he looks at me, the way he talks, just makes my heart melt and my head spin. That's love, isn't it?

Yes. It is.

* * *

_Yay~! Dinner date~! Sorry I cut it there. I just had to end it there or else it would be way too long (and my fingers are killing me x3)_

_I hope no one was too out of character. I tried to think about what they would do with a bitchy teacher. My friend helped me a little, so I think I got it alright.  
__  
I did mention that I will be pulling "controversial" things into this. Such as gay rights, bulling, and mental disorders (obviously). I want my stories to have meaning. *looks at archive* Well, MOST of my stories. At least the important ones x3  
_

_Anyway, REVIEW~! PLEASE REVIEW x3 It makes me feel AWESOME~! (and right now, I could use some awesome in my life Dx) So review if you have the time~!_


	6. Awesome Singing

_New chapter Woo~ It's really bad, but I tried my best. _

_Please try to excuse spelling and grammar issues. I'm really tired right now Dx  
_

_Updates are a little spaced out, but I am NOT giving up. So don't worry. And as for warnings: Prussia. There. So you know he's going to swear._

_For this chapter, though, here's a warning for underage drinking and the use of a song._

_The song is not mine. Nor is Hetalia,_

_So, Let's go~

* * *

  
_

We find ourselves in a rundown burger joint on the other side of the city. The "awesome Mexican place," as we soon found out, closed a few years ago. Gilbert turned beat red when we found this out from a local passerby, but I tried to show him that I really did not care. So we drove around trying to find another Mexican place to no avail. It was only when Gilbert heard my stomach growl that we finally gave up the search and decided on this place.

It wasn't a McDonald's to my happiness. Alfred always insists that we get McDonald's whenever we eat out which, thankfully, isn't too often. I guess I don't mind it too much. I usually get a salad or something praying they didn't find some way to deep fry that. Alfred on the other hand always gets the biggest burger on the menu. I wonder how he isn't fat yet. Or why he hasn't had a heart attack.

This place, though, really isn't that bad. The smell of smoke and beer lingers in the air. The place is a tad rundown with shabby wood paneling throughout, but it still isn't bad. To my surprise, most of the customers are not your run of the mill shady drunks. Actually, most people sitting at the leather booths are teenagers much like myself and Gilbert.

Following a sign's request to seat ourselves, we sit down at a booth by the window. I guess first impressions are not everything as wonderful smells soon replace the smoke and beer. I find myself curious as to what the food tastes like.

The menus are already at the table, so Gil and I begin to flip through them. I sigh when I see that breakfast is not served past eleven. And I am smart enough to figure out they do not mean eleven at night. So, I focus on the other things on the menu. The burgers seem to be the main attraction here. I know that Alfred would take one look at the menu and order a cheeseburger. I like cheeseburgers, but there are other things I like better. Like pancakes!

"Man, there's no awesome Mexican food," Gilbert grumbles, "I guess I'll just get a burger or something." I want to point out that of course there is no Mexican food. This is a burger joint after all. But I don't say anything (of course) nor do I make any motion to point out the ridiculous comment. Instead, I focus my attention on the menu and what I'm going to get.

Finally, I get a breaded fish sandwich and fries. I point to the part of the menu that details the selection further and Gilbert orders it for me. "Why get fish?" he asks as the waitress walks away. I don't really know, honestly. I didn't really want a burger so fish was the next best thing. I like fish. People call me weird and make a face, but fish is actually pretty good. And I think I can trust this place... Maybe.

Either way, we have our food in a little under twenty minutes. Sitting by the window, I can see the sun begin to slip behind the horizon. It's November and it won't be long before the days become very short and the nights very long. I sigh a little. I do prefer the cold, but I also like to see the sun.

Gilbert talks a little bit through bites of his burger. I have to admit, though, that while he does talk rapidly while eating he at least swallows before speaking unlike a certain blonde haired twin I know. I listen kindly, but it isn't the kind of talk that I would actually remember or have to remember. It was just little bits and pieces of his day such as "I owned that History test" and "Our English teacher is crazy, don't you think?" I nod and smile at the appropriate times.

I have to admit that it is a little weird to have only one person doing the talking. There are times in our conversations where Gilbert will pause as though expecting me to reply or speak. I guess that any normal person would take those hints and reply or speak, but I am really just not that normal. Gilbert doesn't miss a beat, though, and just keeps on going. It's both awkward and comforting at the same time.

Our meals are finished with rather quickly. Almost too quickly, in my opinion. I know that we're not at a nice restaurant or anything, but it still seems like only a few minutes ago that we walked in the door. I really want to stay just a little longer. Or maybe, I just want to stay a little longer with Gilbert.

I guess Gilbert feels the same way because when the waitress asks if we want our check, he says no. I give him a questioning look, but smile to let him know that I support the decision to stay just a little longer. We don't speak, but Gilbert looks around us taking in the sight of the other patrons for the first time. He then turns back to me with a smile.

"Hey, Mattie, you ever have beer?" he asks with a sly grin. I look at him with wide eyes. Sure, my mom would let Alfred and I have a sip of her wine on New Years, but I never actually had my own wine or beer. I just was never interested. Alfred hated the stuff. I didn't mind it, but also didn't really like it too much then. I had a feeling, though, that I might like it a little more when I was older. Slowly I shake my head 'no.'

"Hey, Miss?" he calls to the waitress, "Could we get two beers? Twenty ounce draft special please." My breath halts. We're both underage! He might be eighteen, but we don't live in Canada or something! The drinking age is twenty one and we are _not_ twenty one. The waitress gives us a look. I try to look calm and keep my gaze on Gilbert. I don't know why I'm spazzing out about this. I mean, I bet he does this all the time. But I just... Don't!

To my utter surprise, she just nods and walks off to the bar to get our drinks. I give Gilbert a panicked and confused look. "Take a look around, Mattie," he tells me, "Everyone here has got to be only in high school and yet they're drinking. Isn't it obvious? They don't ID here! Now I can finally get some real beer instead of that shit my grandfather drinks."

Before I can do anything, the waitress places a beer in front of me. I blink, unsure of what to do. Gilbert has already put the alcoholic drink to his lips. I just stare at it. Finally, Gilbert notices and gives me a long look followed by a frown. "Aren't you going to have some?" he asks, "Come on, just a little taste!" I shrug and look back down at the yellowish drink. "Please?" Gilbert begs.

Sighing, I pick up the drink and take a small taste. The burn of the alcohol sits on my lips and dances down my throat. I don't know if I like it or not, so I take another slightly longer sip. It burns my throat, but it actually feels really good. The drink itself tastes like a flat 7-Up.

"Is it good?" Gilbert asks placing his drink down. I nod before taking another sip.

* * *

It isn't an hour later that I find myself feeling like shit. My head pounds something fierce and I feel the sting of the beer in the back of my throat. Well, I think it's beer. It could very well be vomit.

You know in those movies where there's a montage of people drinking and the beer bottles pile up? That's pretty much what happens. Three-count it-three beers later, I feel worse than I ever have in my life. Gilbert has had about six and isn't looking too great himself. He has a wry smile on his face and it is really freaking me out.

Everything is a little blurry and I have no clue what time it is. There's a digital clock on the wall, but even when I squint I can't make it out. It's dark, though, I can tell that much from looking outside. If the sun sets at seven, I only have two hours tops before Alfred gets home. And I don't think he knows about my 'dinner date' with Gilbert.

Someone makes an announcement over a microphone and I find myself wishing they would just shut up. The mic is turned up way too loud. But before I can do anything, I feel someone grab my arm. I look up and see Gilbert shooting me a drunken smile and pulling me out of my seat.

"Let's go sing!" he slurs. He's obviously drunk and... Wait. What? I find myself being dragged through the lines of booths and up to a stage that I hadn't noticed when I came in. We mount the steps and Gilbert grabs two mics and hands one to me. There's a purple box decorated in yellow sparkly star stickers in the front of the stage. A woman presses a button and a song comes on.

I stand there for a moment while the intro plays, still not able to get a grasp on what is going on. A harsh voice cuts my thoughts as the albino next to me begins to sing.

_Sing it out  
Boy you've got to see what tomorrow brings_

He pauses and I know that this is where I'm supposed to jump in. I don't of course, but the song keeps playing. "Great job, Mattie!" Gilbert tells me and then continues the rest of the refrain.

_For every time that they want to count you out  
Use your voice every single time you open up your mouth_

This continues for the rest of the song. I really like it, though. I mean, I hate being in front of a crowd, but they're not paying much attention to us. No, I like the song. Like, I love it! It's obvious what the meaning is. What they're saying is that if you have something you want to say, then say it! That's something I haven't been able to do for a long time.

I don't "sing it out" though. I just stand there. But it gets to the point where I am mouthing the words. Nothing comes out-I don't even bother to try-but I am mouthing words like I want to sing. As the song goes on, Gilbert's promise echoes in my head. He said he was going to get my voice back. Maybe even in his drunken mind he still remembers it.

I could lie and say that Gilbert's voice was the most beautiful thing in the world. I could say that I loved it and his voice is lovely even when he's drunk. But I'm not going to as that would be a lie. His voice really is nothing special, but we at least don't get booed off the stage. Instead, the song ends and we just leave. We do stop by the table to get our things and pay the bill and then we leave.

"That was awesome," Gilbert declares as we walk to his car, "I mean, not as awesome as I am but I rocked, didn't I? I was the most amazing dude in the world. You were good, I guess, but not as awesome as the awesome me." I almost giggle at his drunken ramble. And then it really hits me. He's drunk. Like honest to God drunk.

So, I do what any good friend would do. I take the car keys. He doesn't even notice, really, and gets into the passenger seat without a fight. I'm happy about that. I don't know what I would have done if he had argued with me.

I do say that I am not the most sober person in the world either, but I pray that I have maintained enough common sense to get us home. I start the car and begin to drive. I have Gilbert plug int eh GPS and thankfully he is able to do that.

He has his home already preset, so all we have to do is press a button and kind voice is guiding me there. In less than fifteen minutes, we make it to his house. I wonder how we made it to his place so fast when it took us two hours to find the burger place. Then I realize that we probably just drove around in circles like idiots until we finally got hungry enough.

Gilbert looks over at me as I pull into his driveway. "We really fucked up didn't we?" he asks. I turn and shake my head. Really, he was going to hurt much worse in the morning. I was a little drunk, yes, but not as drunk as he obviously was.

I get out of the car with him and follow him to the front door. I knock softly at first and then louder. Finally, an aggravated looking German boy answers the door. He's Ludwig, one of Alfred's friends and Gilbert's younger brother. Alfred and Ludwig are on the football team together. Ludwig is a year younger than us, but he can still hold his own on the field.

"Are you drunk again?" Ludwig asks ignoring me and eying Gilbert dangerously. I nod my head. "You must be Mathew?" he asks. I nod again. "Do you need me to take you home?" I blush, but nod again.

"Hey awesome night, right?" Gilbert slurs as he walks into his house, "We'll have to do it again real soon! Night Mattie."

"Shut up, Gilbert," Ludwig yells, "Grandpa's going to have your head when I get back. And don't think I'm not going to tell him." I hear a muffled "yeah, yeah" as Ludwig shuts the door behind him and steps out into the night. I follow him to the car and hand him the keys before getting in the passenger's seat.

I have to say, the drive is awkward and long. At least, it sure feels that way. Ludwig doesn't say anything as we drive across town and to my apartment building.

"Do you need me to walk you to your apartment?" he asks. He isn't teasing in any way and is being completely serious, but I can't help but blush as I shake my head frantically. "Alright then," he says, "Good night. And be careful around my brother. Next time he buys you a beer, just leave." I chuckle a bit and nod as he drives off.

I make my way up the stairs and to the third floor wondering what time it is. I didn't check before and I bet that if Ludwig was home, Alfred is home. I can only imagine the trouble I'll be in. At least, he's going to be worried. Worried, then mad, then sad, and then he'll apologize.

Taking my key out of my pocket, I carefully open the door and step in. The lights are on, but they are so bright they make my headache worse. The dark night and the dim lighting in the building made the headache somewhat disappear. But with these bright lights, all I want to do is go to bed.

"Mattie?" a voice calls from the couch. Alfred sits up and I see his blue eyes looking at me worriedly. He runs over and wraps me into a hug. "God, where have you been?" he asks. "It's ten. I know it's not all that late and shit, but I was a little worried, dude. You should leave a note next time you go out." I nod and smile a little. "Are you tired?" I nod. "Go to bed. At least it's Friday. We can sleep in a little."

I nod again and make my way to the bedroom. I know Alfred won't be following for a little while, so I take my time getting ready. My thoughts flicker to Gilbert and what happened tonight. Sing, huh? So if I have something to say I should say it? But what if what I had to say would get me in trouble.

I lay myself in the bed and feel my headache going away a little. Gilbert really did look handsome standing in on that stage. His pale skin glistened like you wouldn't believe. He was on fire. And his voice might not be perfect, but he is.

I sigh. What if you're 99% sure you're in love with someone and don't know if they love you back? Should you sing to them anyway?

* * *

_So, I have NEVER ordered beer before and I had no clue what to do, so I asked my dad. He wasn't much help. I hope I did Okay. And my dad said that beer tastes like flat 7-Up, so I went with that. And I've never written drunk people before. So, sorry Dx  
_

_Uhh... So, this chapter sucks. Like really bad. Next chapter is a little bit cuter and fluffier. I hope I do better on that one._

_The song is Sing by My Chemical Romance. It has a purpose in this fic, so be on the look out to me referencing it a little. _

_So review if you get the chance!  
_


	7. The Awesome New Roommate

_Mattie, you know I'm not that great a writer. Why do you have to add to my pain by being so damn hard to write?_

_I really wish I hadn't started writing this in present tense. I really hate it now. I'm contemplating going back and changing it to past tense, but it would take so long and wouldn't be fair to you guys. So, I'm going to keep it the way it is now and suffer through it. _

_Sorry if I absentmindedly switch from present to past tense. I looked it over and I think I'm good, but I can never be 100% sure._

_So, enjoy ^^

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_

The next morning hits me like a ton of bricks. The instant I notice that I am awake, my head begins to pound like you wouldn't believe. My hand shoots up to clutch my head, but there is no relief. I let out a small groan of pain and instantly pray that Alfred didn't hear me.

Slowly, I open my eyes. No sun is coming through the window and the room is in total darkness. My eyes quickly adjust and I see our bedroom door shut. Turning to the left, I see Alfred asleep in his own bed, his body thrown every which way. He is laying on his stomach, his arm dangling over the edge of the bed. Someone walking into the room would have thought that he was dead, but I had lived with him long enough to know that is just the way he sleeps.

Glancing at the clock, I notice that it is only five in the morning. It's another two hours before we need to be up and another three hours before we need to be at the shop. I close my eyes and try to fall back asleep. I fell asleep really quickly last night; how hard can it be tonight?

My answer does not come to me in words, but in a nagging bout of insomnia that overtakes me. I lay there for thirty minutes unable to fall asleep. Sighing, I give up when I realize that I am not going to fall asleep any time soon. So I decide to get up and go make some breakfast. It has been a while since Alfred and I have had a meal together. Maybe cooking some nice fresh chocolate chip pancakes will make me feel better.

I step out of the room as quietly as I can so I don't wake the still sleeping Alfred. I'm sure that once I start cooking, he'll wake up from the smell. I chuckle a little at that thought. He never sleeps when there's food nearby. Sure, sleep is very important to him, but food is the above all end all.

I make my way out to the kitchen, but stop in between the couch and the coffee table. Oh, I am so close! Why? The nausea comes with a vengeance and before I know it, I am running for my life into the bathroom. I burst open the door, not caring if Alfred hears me. The only thing on my mind is getting the vomit out of my body.

And that is exactly what I do.

I spend the next hour hunched over the toilet puking my brains out into the porcelain throne. I don't know how safe the water in New York is, but I decide to take a chance and fill the cup that we use to hold our toothbrushes with the water in between my vomiting episodes. I had hoped the water would help, but I soon learn that it definitely does not.

I can't be sure how much time has passed by now. All I know is that a little light is coming in from the small window above the toilet. I think I hear our alarm go off, but I can't be sure because my retching drowns out all noise.

"Mattie?" I hear not a moment later. I finish and lift my head up to open the door to show Al where I am, but another painful wave of nausea comes over me and I shoot my head back into the toilet. After this episode, I begin coughing and the bathroom door flies open.

Alfred is standing there in his American flag pants and plain white top. His blue eyes look me up and down. They're filled with shock and worry. Without a word he flies down to my side and begins rubbing my back as I begin vomiting again. I had teared up a little before, but now I was tearing a little from embarrassment and I just knew my face was beet red.

When I finish, Alfred hands me the cup of water I had placed next to myself. I take a sip and swallow before taking a few deep breaths.

"Easy, now," Alfred says calmly still rubbing my back, "What happened? You looked fine yesterday. Did you catch something? You're still going to have to go to work today. Sorry, dude, but you already missed a lot after almost getting hit by a car and stuff. Boss-man's not gonna let you take many more days off. At least not with pay."

I nod and look up at him, not realizing that my eyes are probably still a little bloodshot. Alfred takes my chin and looks me up and down. His eyes soften with what I can only describe as knowledge.

"You got wasted last night?" He asks. My eyes widen in shock. I have no clue how he that. I mean, I know I'm puking my guts out into the toilet, but is it really that obvious? "Yes, it really is that obvious, dude," Alfred says reading my mind. What surprises me, though is that he doesn't sound angry. "It's about time!" Okay... What? "I mean, you've never gotten drunk before! Never gone to a party and gotten wasted off your ass! It's about time you started living, dude." He lets out a laugh. "Oh, but you still have to go to work today. It's gonna be a bitch, I know, but if I've had to deal with it before, you have to too."

I nod, still a little shocked, but ready to accept my fate. Alfred helps me up and sits me on the couch before bringing me some pills. He tells me that they are supposed to ease the headache and keep the nausea away. I can only hope he's right.

I guess I never thought of my brother getting drunk. I mean, I know he parties like there's no tomorrow, but I guess he's really good at hiding his hangover. I'm glad I can't talk for once so I don't have to admit that I got drunk after only three beers. That would just be simply embarrassing.

* * *

The pills worked as much as I could hope they would. My head still hurts, but thankfully it was a slow day. I couldn't stop thinking about Gilbert all day, though. He kept popping into my mind. The way he smiled and laughed last night just makes me break out into the goofiest grin in the world. Even when he was drunk he was pretty handsome.

Yes, handsome. I think I might be gay as I have fallen head over heals for this guy. The weird thing is, I think I'm alright with it. I have pretty much accepted the fact that the girls I know don't really want much to do with me. Who would want to boyfriend who doesn't talk?

Who knew that the very guy who saved my life would be the one who becomes my best friend? I don't know if he feels the same way, though. I mean, the way he smiles at me gives me that little bit of hope that maybe, just maybe, he might actually like me. But I guess there's no way to really be sure. I just have to wait and hope and see how everything plays out.

Finally, it is time to go home. Alfred makes sure that I don't run off again. He's never even had to ask me to wait for him; I always have since that incident. Once the store is locked up, we wave goodbye to the boss and pick up our paychecks for the week.

We walk down the streets in silence. Contrary to popular belief, the streets are not packed and the sidewalks have only a few people. At this time of day, it's just my brother and I. The sun is about to go down and the night will be approaching soon.

We are about halfway home when he takes a shaky breath in. I instantly know that he's about to break bad news. I'd need a few sets of hands to count how many times I had heard this shaky breath. "Hey dude?" he asks. This is how he always begins breaking bad news. "Uhm... I'm going away. For Thanksgiving... It's for the football team. We're going to play in Canada in a tournament for the week. Remember how I told you we changed leagues? Well, this tournament is a requirement of our new league. And I'm one of the captains so I really gotta go. And there's going to be scouts there, I think. So I might be able to get a scholarship or something..." He trails off and looks the other way.

I try to get him to turn around with my eyes, but he refuses. I want to tell him that it's alright and that I don't mind. Because truly; I don't. I know it's Thanksgiving and I should be all upset, but I think that Alfred deserves to go on a little vacation. Our boss was already going to give us part of the week off, so that's not a problem.

"I'm sorry I'm leaving you," Alfred sighs after a moment, finally turning around to look at me. His blue eyes are filled with sadness and worry. "I know we haven't been apart since... Well, you know. But if I could get a scholarship, then that's one less money thing we have to worry about. Then if you don't get one, you might still be able to go to college and we can actually make a life for ourselves. I know it's a long shot and stuff, but you never know!"

I nod and chuckle a little. Really, I have no plans for college. I don't know what I would even want to do. But Alfred, I know, wants to make a name for himself either in football or politics. Who am I to hold him back? So I place a reassuring hand on his shoulder and nod to tell him that it's alright and that I don't mind. He smiles up at me and we continue on in a calm, not awkward silence.

* * *

The remaining week goes by quickly. Nothing very new happens at school and Gilbert and I are closer than ever. Alfred knows that we're friends, but hasn't said anything about it. I know he doesn't really like me being friends with Gilbert, but I'm thankful that he's at least keeping it to himself. I don't know when he will finally tell him off. I mean, if he ever found out about the drinking incident with Gilbert I think he'd go through the roof. He might ignore me a bit at school, but when it comes to my health and well being-or at least what he thinks is my health and well being-he doesn't play around.

The Sunday morning he leaves is a quiet and rainy one. It's also rather chilly and I find myself just a bit excited for the inevitable cold winter. This past summer's heat was almost unbearable. I can't wait to finally be able to get all comfy in my sweaters with a nice warm cup of hot chocolate with a dash of maple syrup.

"... And the grocery list is on the fridge... And the remote is on the end table... And the milk expires in two days... And..." Alfred's face scrunches up trying to think of something else to remind me of. I hope he knows that I'll be fine on my own and that if I was the one leaving, I should be the one worried if he'd remember things.

He stands in the doorway of our apartment, shifting from foot to foot uncertainly. I can tell he doesn't want to leave, but wants to leave at the same time. Let's face it: New York City is boring. Going on vacation here is great and all, but actually living here is different. At least, when you're us and struggling to get by in an unforgiving city.

I push these thoughts aside as Alfred pulls me into yet another hug-probably the eighth this morning-and gives me a pat on the back. "I'll miss you, dude," he says, "Be good." I nod and smile to tell him the same thing. In the blink of an eye he's gone with just his lingering scent to prove that he ever was standing there.

With nothing else to do, I collapse on the couch and sigh. The house seems different even though Alfred has been gone for the grand total of a minute and a half. By now on any normal Sunday morning, I would be cooking breakfast and he would be yelling at the television until I was done. Then we would hang around the house or go grocery shopping. But now I'm stuck here by myself with nothing else to do.

I must have dozed off, because my eyes snap open when I hear a knock at the door. Not knowing how much time has passed, I think that it must be Alfred who has forgotten something. But a quick glance at the clock tells me that it's well past the time that the bus was supposed to leave. If Alfred had forgotten anything, it's too late now.

I open the door cautiously, wondering who in the world it could be. My own violet eyes are met with a set of ruby red ones. I gasp in surprise but my mouth turns upward in a genuine smile. Gilbert walks in as I step aside and I hear something thud to the floor. Looking down, I notice a brown bag that might be used as a carry-on when flying on an airplane. I look at him quizzically wondering what in the world could be going through his head now.

"Hey, Birdie!" he exclaims, "What's up? I heard that burger brained brother of yours is going away for the week so you know what I've decided? I'm going to be your awesome new roommate! How awesome is that?" He holds his hand out for a high five.

I stand there stunned for a moment before my smile returns and I slap his hand. I know that this is either going to end amazingly or horribly. But you know what? I really don't care. This really is going to be an 'awesome' week. I just know it!

* * *

_Yay~ Finally we can get to the good part of the story. Now that I've shipped Alfred off we can get down to the fluff n' stuff xD_

_Updates will again be spaced out. I wouldn't have updated today except that I have a snowday. So Whoo~_

_Please review if you get the chance. It really helps me improve as a writer and it makes me break out into the biggest goofiest grin just like Mattie here xD  
_


	8. UnAwesome Movies With Awesome Fluff

_You guys better kiss my feet for this. 2 updates in 2 days? LE FLIPPING GASP xD LOL Just kidding. You don't have to kiss my feet. But we had two snow days in a row, so I'm actually ahead of myself with this. Whoo~_

_So, enjoy some FLUFF n' stuff. Sorry for any OOCness. I tried my best :3 Enjoy~_

_ps: Gute Nacht: Good Night (German)  
_

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* * *

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Gilbert sure makes himself at home. He grabs his suitcase and throws it on the floor by the couch. He then jumps into a chair and turns on the television. As I begin to make my way over to him, he looks up at me. "Your TV's a piece of shit," he tells me. Gee, thanks. Tell me something I don't know. "Anyway, there's this awesome street carnival tomorrow. Wanna go? It's not as awesome as a real amusement part, but it's some little thing the middle school puts on each year."

I nod and smile a little. I remember that carnival from when I was in middle school. All the kids at the school would take over a booth and help raise money for charity. Some rides would be set up in the school parking lot and it would surprisingly make a good about of money.

"Awesome! It starts at nine tomorrow and doesn't end until ten at night!" Gilbert exclaims, "This is going to be so awesome! Consider it our first real date!" I freeze. Did he just say date? Sure... Surely he just meant the first real time we hang out, right? I mean... We're not going out or anything. Are we? Maybe we are?

"You okay, Birdie?" Gilbert asks. I nod hesitantly. He raises and eyebrow, but lets it go. I finish walking over to the couch and sit down. He jumps off the chair and sits himself down next to me. "Hey, I have an awesome idea! Let's watch a movie! You do have a DVD player, right?" I shake my head 'no.' Actually, we don't have a movie player of any sort. When you're struggling to make ends meet, you cannot afford nor do you have time to watch a movie.

Gilbert's mouth forms an 'o' and he begins to flip through the channels. "Hey, look!" he exclaims. "_Silent Hill_ is on AMC. How awesome is that? We should totally watch it!" He looks up at me pleading with his eyes. How can I say no?

Sure, scary movies are not my best friends, but how bad can it get? I mean, last time Alfred and I watched a scary movie we slept in each others beds for a week. That's not too long is it? I nod and instantly regret it, but I make my way to the kitchen to make some popcorn.

Alfred does not do well with scary movies, but always feels like he has to watch them to 'prove himself' or something. So when we watched our last scary movie, it was half his fault that we had to sleep together. Then again, I guess I can't lie. I was scared too.

I come out a few minutes later with some hot chocolate for both of us, some popcorn, and a bottle of maple syrup. I sit down next to Gilbert as the movie starts. Just my luck. It couldn't have already been halfway over?

Gilbert eyes my bottle of maple syrup as he stirs his hot chocolate. I ignore it though, I take the bottle to pour some into my own mug of hot chocolate.

"What are you doing?" he asks. I smile and make the gesture again. "Let me try that." I nod and pour some syrup into his mug. He stirs it around before taking a sip. His eyes widen. "Holy shit that's awesome! Dude, you are a flipping genius! Hit me again!" I laugh and pour some more into his mug before capping the bottle and setting it back on the table. I take my own warm mug in my hands and settle into the couch.

Throughout the movie, Gilbert has his arm around me. I can't help but blush; it's so cute. Not even halfway through the movie the really scary part comes and it becomes too much for me. I find myself buried in Gilbert's sleeve. He just holds me tight and stokes my hair. After a few minutes I hear the channel click and some children's show is playing on the television. I lift my head up and look at him quizzically.

"That movie was so un-awesome," he explains rolling his eyes, "Besides, I realized that I wasn't in the mood for scary. We should watch something different." I smile up at him and wipe away the tears that must have slipped out. I then look over and glance at the clock. It's five in the evening. The time must have really gone by without me noticing.

I get up and bring Gilbert's empty mug and the popcorn bowl back into the kitchen. I also grab my own mug to dump and clean off as I didn't drink too much. I can feel Gilbert watching me as I open up the fridge and begin to search around trying to find something for dinner. I hear footsteps and then water pouring out of the faucet. Looking up, I see Gilbert washing the dishes. I look at him curiously from behind.

"I figured that I should wash my own cup," Gilbert explains as he turns around and begins to dry his mug. "See how awesome I am? But you're making dinner. And I'm starved so make it good." He gives me a wink and places the now dry mug on the counter before seating himself at the table that sits in between the kitchen and living room.

I smile and let out a small sigh before returning to the fridge. My smile quickly fades as I realize that I have nothing worth giving anyone. We have some freezer meals. Checking the cabinets, I notice that we have some Spaghetti-O's, but who would want that? That's when it hits me. Sunday is grocery day. Had Gilbert not come over, I would have been able to get out to store and buy some real food.

Sighing again, I settle on making ham sandwiches with the remaining ham and cheese we have. I also set out some chips and the last of our dip trying to make the meal look a little less sad. But Gilbert doesn't say anything. He just smiles and takes a bite before exclaiming something about me being awesome (but not as awesome as he is).

When dinner is over, I wash the dishes and put everything away before joining Gilbert on the couch. There's some stupid show on the television, but I don't pay much attention. Instead, I focus on the fact that Gilbert had his arm around me yet again and is pulling me close to him. His arms are strong and reassuring. Don't get me wrong: I've always felt safe in my house. But with Gilbert here, I just feel so much safer.

Gilbert goes on and on about different things. I wince a bit when he brings up what happened last night, but find it a bit funny when he describes how Ludwig reacted to him. Apparently, Gilbert threatened to tell their Grandfather about Ludwig's porn stash if he told on Gilbert about getting drunk.

It seems like only an hour had gone by, but soon I realize that it is midnight. We get the whole week off for school and the boss gave us the week off, but I can't help but feel a little tired. Gilbert notices this when I let out a yawn.

"Tired, Birdie?" he asks. I nod. "Alright, then the awesome me is going to bed. You should get some rest too. 'Cause we have that carnival tomorrow, remember?" I smile and nod remembering his promise of the carnival tomorrow.

We get off the couch and Gilbert begins to remove the cushions. I watch him for a moment wondering if maybe he needs those to sleep. Then I see him tugging on the bottom of the couch and pushing the coffee table away with his foot. The couch expands and a full bed is formed. I can't help but gasp in surprise. I never knew our couch did that.

"The awesome me needs more place to sleep and stuff," Gilbert explains, "Plus, I am not sleeping in Burger-Brain's bed. It probably has flees or something." I smile a little and nod.

We stand there for a moment before I notice that something is off. Finally, I remember what is missing and blush before giving Gilbert a quick hug. He smiles at me and I smile back feeling my face heat up. "_Gute Nacht,_" he says before I return to my room.

I sit down heavily on the bed and begin to get changed. The events of the day run through my mind and I can't help but smile. I'm so lucky to have Gilbert here with me.

I settle into bed, but I can't fall asleep. That scary movie keeps playing over and over in my mind. With the door closed and the lights off, I feel scared and I just want someone to comfort me!

I nod off for about an hour and begin to dream. In the dream a monster is chasing me, but I can't yell. I run and run until I finally find Alfred and Gilbert. I tug on their arms and try to talk, but I can't. They turn around and look at me expectantly, but no words come out of my mouth. I look behind and see the monster not three feet away. I look it dead in the eye-or where the eye should be if it actually had one. The monster takes out one shiny claw and rips into both Gilbert and Alfred. Blood goes everywhere and I scream at the sight. The monster lets them drop and turns around to me before his sharp claws dig into my own flesh. I continue screaming before my body goes limp.

I wake up screaming and shoot up in bed. My forehead is dripping with sweat and tears fall down my cheeks. Suddenly, the door flies open and I begin to scream again. A pair of strong arms wrap me into a strong hug.

"Hey, Birdie, it's okay," A familiar gruff voice soothes. I look up and through my bury vision see a white haired boy standing over me. I bury myself into Gilbert's chest and sob a little more. I don't want to let go; I don't want to loose him.

Gilbert begins to loosen his hold on me, but I won't let him. I lurch forward and grasp his arm. I won't let him leave me. He glances down at me with worry, but does not move away again. Instead, he pulls me closer to him and lifts me out of the bed. I don't have time to be embarrassed as he picks up my glasses off the nightstand and whisks me away into the living room.

He brings me to the pulled out couch and lays me on it. I reach up like a small child as he releases me from his grip, but something tells me that I don't need to be scared anymore. He pulls a blanket over me and sets my glasses on the coffee table that was moved to the side to make room for the bed. I dare not close my eyes as I watch him climb into the bed.

Once in the bed himself, he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close to him. My face heats up as I feel the first wave of embarrassment come on. "Don't worry, Birdie," Gilbert whispers low and soft, "I've got you. I'm too awesome to let anything happen to you. You're going to be just fine. Now go to sleep and the awesome me will keep you safe." I nod and snuggle close to his chest. I fall asleep instantly as my own exhaustion overtakes me.

* * *

I wake up the next morning as light from the small kitchen window filters through. I find myself laying on the pull-out bed that was once the couch and covered with a bunch of warm blankets. Blinking away my sleepiness, I try to remember how I ended up there. The events of the last night hit me like a ton of bricks and my face turns beet red.

The next thing I notice is that I am now alone. I remember falling asleep with Gilbert's arms wrapped protectively around me, but now he is nowhere to be found in the bed. Sitting up, the smell of something burning catches my attention. I look in the direction of the kitchen, but I hear him before I see him.

"Shit!" he yells, "Ow! Fuck!" Gilbert begins to curse at whatever he might have been attempting to cook. I hear the water from the faucet turn on and I sigh knowing that he more than likely burnt himself.

I get off the bed and walk into the kitchen where Gilbert now has his middle finger stuck in his mouth. He lights the stove again and sticks the pan back over the fire. "Now you are going to Goddamn cook or I'll beat your ass into next week!" he shouts at the poor pan.

I walk over and stand next to him to examine what he is trying to do. There is beige pancake batter all over the pan. It's in some weird looking shape that is most definitely not a circle. Giggling, I reach for the knob on the stove and turn the fire off.

"Oh! Hey Birdie," Gilbert says surprised. "I was just trying to cook some pancakes. But they're being totally un-awesome and mean to me and they burnt me." I smile up at his pouting face and take his fingers off the pan to bring it to the sink. I start running cold water over it and decide to wash it off later. Now, I have to deal with Gilbert and his attempts to 'help.'

Before he can say anything, I take the box of pancake mix and bring it over to the bare counter. I then dig in the cabinets underneath to get out the pancake maker Al got me for my birthday this year. I look up at Gilbert and gesture to the object as I plug it in.

"Oh..." Gilbert trailed off. I laugh a bit as his expression, "Wow, that is totally awesome! I bet you can make awesome pancakes with those. Though, they're probably not as awesome as the pancakes I could've made."

Smiling, I gesture for him to take a seat at the table while I get the pancakes ready. While they are cooking, I set out the maple syrup and butter and pour us both some water. I know milk is probably the best thing to have for breakfast, but the milk expires tomorrow and I'm not taking any chances. Besides, there isn't enough for both of us; there's barely enough for one glass.

Gilbert goes on and on about how awesome his pancakes would have been while we eat. It's nice listening to his voice. It's interesting how gruff it can sound normally, but how soothing it can really be. He doesn't mention last night at all, but I do notice a hit of pink on his super pale skin every time we make eye contact.

After I clean up, Gilbert takes a shower and gets dressed in the bathroom while I get dressed in my bedroom. I pull on a plain red sweatshirt and blue jeans. I remember something about Gilbert wanting to take me to a carnival today so I try to dress warmly and comfortably.

I also remember that we have to go grocery shopping today, so I make my way back to the kitchen to check the list Al and I made up before he left and add to it if need be. By the time Gilbert gets out of the bathroom, I have added ten things he forgot to the list and am sitting waiting on the couch. He gives me a look and I hand him the list hoping he knows that I need to go grocery shopping. But instead, he hands it back to me with a confused look.

"What is it?" he asks. I sigh and write grocery list at the top and show it to him. "Oh! You have to go shopping," he says getting it for the first time, "Awesome! Can I come?" I nod and try not to roll my eyes. If I didn't want him to come, I wouldn't have waited for him. "Then let's go! When we get back we can go to that awesome carnival at the middle school!" Gilbert pulls me up from the couch and brings me to the door. I grab my wallet off the counter before he pulls me out the door.

As we walk down the hallway of the building, I wonder how this day is going to go. It's just me and Gilbert, a grocery list, and a carnival. This is going to be one weird day.

* * *

_1__st__ off: When I say that Alfred and Mattie slept together, I do NOT mean like THAT. So get your goddam heads out of the gutter xD But seriously, I just mean like brother to brother. Mkay?_

_2__nd__: Silent Hill is a real movie. I picked it 'cause it's Canadian. I've never watched it, though... I dun like scary xD /shot And I just realized that it's on AMC, the American Movie Channel. Fail xD  
_

_3rd: I took some creative liberty and decided that Mattie is also a little afraid of ghosts and scary stuff. Probably got it from Alfred xD  
But, ya know? Cuteness n' stuff is cute... N stuff. So yeah xD  
_

_This was meant to also go into the carnival part, but it got really... Long. _

_Review if you get the chance ^^ And THANK YOU~ I love hearing that my story is your favorite. That just makes my whole day. Thank you all~  
_


	9. The Awesome Carnival

_Whoo~ Another chapter~ (and a long one at that xD)  
I'm updating today because it's Friday and I'm putting my homework off. I also have Littles (State qualifyers) for Speech and Debate (I'm in impromptu ^^) Wish my team and I luck~ xD_

_I REALLY hope this isn't too out of character. It's just when... Well, you'll see. _

_Don't kill me and enjoy~

* * *

  
_

Gilbert and I walk into the large grocery store about five blocks from the apartment. He runs over to the shopping carts and jumps in one. He literally jumps into the basket. I stare at him blankly for a moment wondering what in the world he is doing.

"Come on, Mattie!" Gilbert shouts at me, "I always make Luddy push me around in these things! It's awesome! We can take turns if you want!" I shake my head 'no' while trying to stifle a laugh as I make my way over to the cart and firmly grasp it with both hands. All I can do is pray that no one sees us.

You know, there's nothing better than a 17 year old boy riding in a shopping cart like a toddler while his friend pushes him around in it. Scratch that... There's nothing cuter. Yes, cuter. Honestly, the way he sat around in that little cart had to be just about the cutest thing I have ever seen.

"Go faster, Mattie!" Gilbert shouts at me as we go through the frozen foods. "Come on, this is awesome!" I make a face and continue at my original pace. I want to tell him that if he doesn't shut up, we're going to get kicked out of the store!

Somehow, though, we don't. We make it all the way to the check out before Gilbert gets out. I check and double check the list while we unpack the cart. Thankfully, everything is there. We usually forget _something_ and make the whole line wait for us while we go find it. Well, Alfred makes the whole line wait. I would be more than happy to just go to the back of the line after retrieving whatever we had forgotten.

I pay for the groceries while Gilbert starts begging for candy. I swear it's like having a little kid. And I swear he adds a chocolate bar to the groceries. He does, though, slip a dollar into my pocket. At least he's courteous when he's being rude.

The lady at the register just giggles. I smile and nod, like I usually do. Alfred is the one to chats with the people at the registers. I try to be kind while not having to talk. Usually, the people don't try to make me talk and either rambles on or is silent.

Soon, we are making our way down the streets, our arms full of bags. Gilbert is a huge help. I'm usually not strong enough to carry everything by myself so I almost never go alone. Gilbert can carry even more than Alfred can. Or maybe, he's just being extra helpful. I'm sure Alfred could carry that much if he wanted to.

We make it back to my apartment tired, but in one piece. After putting the groceries away, Gilbert starts going on and on about the carnival. I stuff my wallet back into my jeans and make for the door knowing that he wants to leave soon.

"Hey, Birdie?" He asks walking up to me. I nod, telling him to go on. For once he seems at a loss of words. He shifts from foot to foot with an awkward look on his face. "So... Since we're going to a thing together, I was wondering if you wanted to go _together_... You know what I mean?" No, not really. "Uhm... Well, you know... As... A couple? 'Cause couples are totally awesome. And I think you're awesome enough to be with me."

I blush as I feel my face heat up. He... He wants to... To go out? With me? I.. I don't know what to say. I mean, I know I'm not going to _say_ anything... But what do I do? I then realized that I haven't wanted anything more for the past few weeks.

So, I nod 'yes' and look down.

"Awesome!" Gilbert shouts, "Now, let's go! This is going to be the most fucking awesome thing in the world!" He grabs my hand before I can even recover from the mini heart attack he gave me and drags me out the door.

* * *

The carnival is filled the the brim with people. I have never seen so many people packed into one tiny parking lot in my life! When Al and I went here about four years ago, we never got this many people. Maybe word had spread about this little fair. It might just be the new rides I see at the end of the parking lot. Still, I can't help but feel amazed by how big the middle school parking lot looks when it's turned into the fair.

Gilbert and I make our way down the path lined with games and booths. Now that we're "going out," he holds my hand protectively. He said a little while ago that it was just so I wouldn't get lost. I don't mind; his hand is really comforting. I just hope my hand isn't sweating; my hands get really sweaty when I'm nervous.

Crowds and I don't really like each other. I guess that because I am so shy, it is only natural that I don't like large crowds. I probably would have reached for Gilbert's hand at some point or another just to feel more comfortable.

We weave our way past the many people just hanging around. We don't see anyone that we know and I'm a little thankful for that. What will the kids at school say if they find out Gilbert and I are going out? What will they say when they _do _find out? I'm probably just being silly or something, but I can't help but worry.

"Hey, wanna go on a ride?" Gilbert asks me. I look up at him and nod, feeling a blush creeping across my face. "Which one?" he asks. I look around, but don't see anything that really sparks my interest. So I shrug to let him know that he can pick. He smiles down at me and drags me over to a ride called "The Hang Glider." It appears to be a ride that you lie down on and spin in a circle generating the feeling that you are hang gliding.

The ride is just getting out after a run, so Gilbert and I aren't stuck in line forever. He takes me through the line, stopping only to show the ticket taker the wrist bands we purchased that give us an all-day pass on the rides.

Gilbert walks me over to hang glider ten. I watch as he gets on and I get on after him. We're laying side-by-side with our legs dangling over the edge. He turns to me and flashes me a toothy smile. I smile back with a slight giggle.

The ride starts with a jolt and I see the ground getting further and further away as we are hoisted into the air. As the ride begins to spin-slowly at first-I grab Gilbert's hand before I can really understand what I am doing. He holds back, though, and even gives my hand a little squeeze as we are rocketed around in circles.

It's a really cool feeling-being so high above everything else. You can see all the little people walking around below you. From so high you can see everything. And you feel like you are on top of the world. With Gilbert next to me, I just might be.

I almost feel disappointed when the ride starts to descend and slow down. Finally, we are back to the level we started at and our protective seat belts unhook automatically with a click. Gilbert hops off, then reaches out his hand for me to stand up. I take it and soon I am standing right next to him.

"That was awesome, wasn't it?" he starts rambling as we walk out of the ride, "I mean we were so high up! I can't believe how awesome that was! That ride is the shit! We should do some more!" I laugh a little at his overly excited attitude and he shoots me a cocky grin.

The rest of the afternoon is spent riding all the rides we can find... And Gilbert wasting almost all of our money on games that are obviously rigged. I don't care, though. As long as I'm with him, it really doesn't matter.

Sitting on a bench eating some cotton candy, my mind begins to wander. I start wondering what Alfred would say if he found out Gilbert and I were going out. I know Alfred doesn't like Gilbert much, but he wouldn't try to break us apart if and when he finds out... Would he? Sure, Alfred is a few minutes older than me, but he has no right to tell me who I can and cannot date.

Looking up at Gilbert, I find that I really don't care what anyone thinks. It's the truth, really. I have always been the type of person who worries what other people thought. I am always worried that teachers don't like me or people outcast me for reasons that I can't fix. Mostly, I am afraid of being excluded because of my Mutism. So, I always try to do what others want me to. Sometimes it's what I want, but it's often something that I feel I _have_ to do to be accepted.

Gilbert is different, though. He never makes me do things I don't want to do. Sure, he can seem aggressive and rude, but I know that if I told him to stop he would; I have a few times. For instance today he tried to get me to dish out more money on a game he would never win. I shook my head 'no' and stood firm. Gilbert pouted for a good five minutes, but understood for the most part where I was coming from.

"Hey, check it out!" Gilbert exclaims nudging me. I follow his gaze to another game booth and sigh. "I bet I can win that! Here, just give me five more dollars. Please!" I try to look away and not at those ruby red eyes. I try not to imagine the innocent, hurt look that is probably on his face. I try, but fail as usual. I dig into my pocket and pull out five dollars.

Gilbert fist pumps for joy and drags me over to the booth. As we approach, I see that it is one of those water race ones. You know, the games where you have to shoot water into a hole to make the pawns go.

Gilbert seats himself in the sixth seat. I stand behind him to avoid being asked if I want to play as well. He hands the man the bill and waits as about five more people come.

"Alright," the man says, "With six players you're playing for the large toys on the top shelf. You know the rules. So, is everyone ready?" Gilbert shouts "Yeah!" while the other people just nod their head. The bell dings and the water shoots from the gun.

It's a cut throat battle between Gilbert and a blonde haired kid who looks to be in sixth grade. They had both positioned their guns in a way that would shoot into the center hole as soon as the water started. They appeared to be tied and I can't tell who's going to win.

The bell dings again and I glance up. Unfortunately, I can't read the numbers painted on the wooden bears.

"Congratulations... Number six!" The man says rather unenthusiastically. "Pick a prize."

Gilbert starts smiling like an idiot. By now, everyone else is gone-even the blonde haired kid. Gilbert scans the shelf looking for the perfect prize. "That one," he finally responds pointing to a white stuffed bear. The man mumbled something about a good choice and hands it to him.

"Here," Gilbert smiles handing me the bear as we get up and walk away, heading for the exit. I look at him with shock. Why would he give his hard earned prize to me? "Aren't you going to take it? Or do you want something more awesome? Because I can go ask the man to change..." I immediately shake my head no and take the stuffed bear from him. It's rather soft and seems to be made of rather good material. At least, good for a carnival toy.

"What are you going to name it?" Gilbert asks with a small smirk on his face. "Something awesome, I hope. How about Awesome? Or Gilbert." I start laughing a little and look down thoughtfully at the bear. I really don't know what to name it. I don't even know if I should. It just seems like something Arthur or a young kid would do.

"Oh, hey! How about Kumajiro?" I give Gilbert a look. Where did he get that name? I mean, there's a Japanese student at school that I know his brother is friends with, but that's such a random name. It has a nice ring to it, but I'm afraid I'll forget it later. "Yes! That's perfect! Isn't it awesome?" Gilbert asks excitedly. I smile and nod. It is a pretty cute name. And who am I to reject such a cute idea? I'm just worried I'll forget it later...

We find ourselves just outside of the carnival. Walking down the streets, I notice that the sun is just starting to go down. I hold the bear in one hand and Gilbert's hand in the other. Suddenly, one of the few cars on the road stops by us. We pause as a window rolls down.

"Ah, what do we have here?" a heavily accented voice asks. "That is surely Gilbert, no?"

"Francis? What are you doing here?" Gilbert asks his blonde friend. Looking up at him, I see his face pulled back in a fake smile. He shoves me a little in front of him and whispers, "Keep going; awesome me will be with you shortly." I nod, confused, and start slowly walking away. There's a corner coming up, so I figure I'll just pause there to wait for him. I can also hear everything from there.

"What are you doing with that freak?" Another voice asks. I know it instantly. Antonio is probably the driver.

"Hey, cool it," Gilbert snaps, "He's pretty awesome when you get to know him."

"Why did you ask me to lay off of him?" Antonio responds completely ignoring Gilbert's last statement, "Someone who doesn't talk deserves whatever he's given."

"I said 'cool it,'" Gilbert restates, "And I mean it. Don't go all unawesome on me, okay?"

"Fine, Gilbert," Francis sighs, "We'll see you in school next week. And we want to see you without _him_. Imagine how fast our popularity will dwindle. If you want to date the cheerleaders and show them your 'five meters,' then you'd better get rid of him while you can." With that, the window rolls up and begins to drive away.

I am not quite at the corner as I realize that I wouldn't have been able to hear everything if I went any further. My heart sinks and I clutch the bear. I just know Gilbert is going to go back to my house, get his stuff, and leave. I can feel tears building in my eyes. I just let them spill over. What does it even matter now?

I continue walking by myself away from Gilbert. I see the lights from the car bounce off the sidewalk, street, and buildings in front of me, the shadows exaggerated by the dwindling light. It stops, though, and I turn around half expecting to see Gilbert climbing in. Instead, as soon as I turn around it speeds up. Gilbert begins shouting and chasing after it.

I gasp, thinking that they're going to swerve and hit me, but I am thankfully wrong. It stays on a straight course and goes past me at about fifty miles an hour, hitting the puddle on the side of the street and dousing me with water.

I stand there for a moment, completely drenched from head to toe. Suddenly, the chill of the late November air hits me and I am suddenly freezing. More tears come and I stand on the sidewalk by myself, looking down at the ground and not knowing what to do with myself.

"God-Fucking-Dammit!" I hear Gilbert shout. Looking up, I see that he is standing right in front of me. He wraps his arms around me, trying to generate warmth, but knowing it won't help. He starts stroking my soaked hair. "I'm going to get those bastards," he murmurs. I pull away, not wanting to hear it and start walking.

"Where are you going, Birdie?" he calls and jogs up a few steps to me. He grabs my wrist, but I pull away. Frustrated, he grabs my shoulders and spins me around. "Why are you crying?" he asks after a beat. I just look down as the tears continue coming. I realize I can hardly see anything through my wet glasses. "Oh, Birdie," he coos pulling me close to him and not caring if his clothes get all wet. "I'm not going to leave you. I promise. Those idiots are so unawesome. But I'm not going to leave you. I promise I wouldn't hurt you like that. I promise more than anything! It's an awesome promise too! Because I'm awesome. And you're so awesome that I wouldn't leave you in a heard beat."

Pushing me away, he examines my face. "Besides," he says, "I'm your boyfriend now. Why would I leave you?" I smile a little, but am interrupted by a sneeze and shoots through my airways. Another one and then another one comes. Suddenly, I'm very cold and very, very tired. Gilbert just tugs me closer to him again.

"You're going to get a cold, aren't you?" he asks, "Don't worry. We'll get home and get you changed. Then we can deal with this unawesome cold." Without warning, He lifts me into his arms bridal-style and holds me close.

We walk the next few blocks back home as I struggle to stay awake. I make it, though, and soon the warm air of the apartment greets me. Gilbert throws down a towel he gets from the bathroom on the couch we never folded away and sets me down. Taking another towel, he removes my glasses and wipes them off before placing them back on my nose. He gives my nose a little squeeze and I smile. He also wipes my hair off and drys it almost completely.

Gilbert then goes and gets my Pjs from the bedroom and brings them out to me. "I won't look; I promise," he says handing me the warm clothes, "Just get changed." He turns around and I switch my wet clothes for my warm Pjs.

"You look awesome!" Gilbert laughs. I smile again, but a bunch of coughs interrupt me. I keel over, clutching my stomach. Gilbert sits down next to me and holds me while patting my back. When I am finished, he puts his hand to my forehead.

"Go to bed," he tells me, "I think you're getting a fever. And fevers are not awesome." I smile a little as my tired eyelids start to grow heavy. Gilbert lays me down on the bed and covers me with the blanket.

I let darkness claim me as he lays another heavy blanket on top of me. "I love you," I hear him whisper.

_I love you too.

* * *

_

_I think that Gil would be all cute n' stuff about asking Mattie out. Maybe I'm wrong._

_I'm also sorry that Antonio and Francis are bullies :( But it will all work out. You just have to trust me. Me, a random girl on the internet *pedo smile* xD_

_Anyway, review if you get the chance! I love hearing from all of you. You are all seriously too kind. I wouldn't be motivated to update as much without you guys. That's not to say I'd _never_ update, but that I wouldn't be motivated to and wouldn't as often._

_Okay, I'll shut up now. Just review if you get the chance and have a wonderful weekend :)_


	10. Being Sick is not Awesome

_Sorry it's been so long! School and stuff has been keeping me from writing a lot. But here's the next chapter. I hope you like it~!  
_

_I hope I wrote this alright. I feel a little tired at the moment, so I hope I caught everything. It just seems... dead. But then again, I probably am pretty dead after a long day at school xD_

_So, Enjoy~! One warning: Prussia's Swearing~

* * *

  
_

There is a loud crash followed by some rather colorful language. That is my first clue that I am awake and obviously not alone. I slowly open my eyes and groan. It is far too bright which is actually a little weird. Usually, the apartment is rather dark.

The next thing I notice is that my head feels really cloudy. Upon opening my eyes fully, I am instantly dizzy. I also realize that my nose is stuffed up and my throat is very dry. My body feels really warm as well, but that might simply be from the heavy blankets that are covering me.

I hear the dull tap of bare feet across carpet as they make their way to the couch I am laying on. Someone brushes away the hair that is covering my face and the room becomes that much brighter. I blink and am met with piercing red eyes.

"You awake, Birdie?" he asks, "How are you feeling? Probably not very awesome, huh? You look a little paler than usual. Oh, and you have a fever. It was 101.7 last I checked about an hour ago. It's ten in the morning, by the way."

I nod and smile before erupting into loud, violent coughs. Gilbert asks if I want some water and I not again. The water helps a little, but I still feel really bad. At least I'm not nauseous. That's something to be thankful for at least. How embarrassing would it be to have Gilbert watching as I barf my guts out into my toilet? It's just something I would rather avoid.

"Hey! I have a present for you," Gilbert exclaims as he helps me sit up against the back of the couch, "Two, actually, because I'm just awesome like that." He runs into the kitchen and comes back carrying two items in his hands. One is the bear he gave me last night. What did we decide to name it? Kumakitchi or something like that. The other item is what looks to be a small whiteboard.

"I went down to the laundry room to wash your clothes and gave your bear a little drying," Gilbert explains handing me the bear and sitting on the floor by the couch. "You... might not want to wear that underwear again... The washer was so unawesome." He pouts for a moment and I wonder what in the name of God he could have done to a pair of underwear. He then hands me the whiteboard.  
"I had Luddy pick this up for me. See, now you can tell me what you need. You don't have to use it if you don't want, but it would be awesome if you did so I know exactly what's going on."

I smile. That is actually a really good idea. I promise myself that I will try it. Sure, some people had tried to get me to use writing as a form of 'expressing myself,' but it never worked out. I would forget the notebook or whiteboard or loose it. Besides, sometimes I just don't want people to know what I'm thinking. But Gilbert seems so excited by the idea that I just might try it for him.

"So... Do you think you'll use it?" he asks. I nod. "Awesome! Now I can be the most epically awesome nurse! Or maybe not nurse... Something more manly and awesome than just a nurse!" I laugh as I watch him try to think of a name to call himself. Finally, he just gives up and decides that he's "too awesome" for a set title.

"Oh," he continues realizing something he had forgotten before, "And that whiteboard might help you get your voice back. I still haven't forgotten my awesome promise, alright?" I smile at the mention of the promise. I had almost forgotten about it and I'm glad he didn't.

"Hey, I made you some hot chocolate," Gilbert smiles. I can tell he's pretty proud of himself, but I can't help but remember the crash from before. Gilbert happily makes his way to the kitchen and returns with a blue steaming cup. He also has the maple syrup tucked under his left arm.

Setting the cup down on the coffee table he moved to my side of the couch, he pours some syrup in the warm drink and begins to stir it around. I find myself amazed at how he remembers how I like my hot chocolate. I never thought he would actually pay that much attention to me. No one else ever did. After a moment, he hands me the warm cup, blowing on it lightly to cool it off. I take the mug from him and take a big, long sip. The liquid is hot and burns my throat, but it feels so good.

"Is it awesome?" Gilbert asks with hopeful eyes. To tell the truth, I can't really taste it. Still, I nod and smile just so I can see his eyes light up. "Awesome!" he shouts, throwing his fist in the air. His enthusiasm makes me laugh and I am reminded of how handsome he looks when he is excited.

Suddenly, I feeling that I can only describe as 'bad' overwhelms me. I place the cup on the coffee table and begin to cough violently. My breath becomes labored and my coughs are much worse than before. Instantly, Gilbert is there rubbing my back and whispering in my ears. When I finally stop coughing, he keeps be wrapped up in a tight hug whispering soothing words in my ears such as "It's alright" and "Awesome is here." I am thankful that he keeps such a tight hold on me because I instantly feel very dizzy again.

A shiver rips through my body and I feel goosebumps form under my sleeves. I continue to shiver, but I don't understand why I feel so hot and yet am apparently so cold. Gilbert is quick to wrap a blanket around me and lay me on the couch-bed.

"You should take an awesome little nap," Gilbert tells me as he covers me with another blanket. "The Awesome Me will be here when you wake up. Then we can plan an awesome Thanksgiving together!" I smile and nod weakly before closing my eyes and drifting off into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

"Hey, Birdie, I made you some soup. It's awesome! And I didn't break anything, so it's even more awesome!" Slowly, I come out of my sleep and find myself back on the couch-bed with Gilbert close by. I open my eyes and see Gilbert placing a bowl on the coffee table. With a sneeze, I sit up.

"God-Awesome-Bless you!" Gilbert greets. I laugh at his use of the English language-or lack of it. "Feeling better?" he continues, "You look a bit more awesome and I think your temp went down, but I didn't check it. Anyway, I made you an awesome lunch. It's one fifteen, so I thought you'd be hungry." I smile. Really, I don't feel all that hungry, but it would probably be best to eat something. So, I reach for the bowl and take a bite. The warm feeling of chicken noodle fills my mouth, though I still can't taste anything.

"I know; it's awesome," Gilbert says with a haughty grin, "I mean, _I_ cooked it after all, so it has to be amazing!" I guess it isn't that bad. It really can't be as bad as Arthur's cooking, can it? Besides, I decide, if I don't die then it must have been decent.

I don't finish all the soup and feel a little guilty that I can't. Gilbert doesn't make me feel bad, though. He just tells me that I ate well for someone with a fever and that he'll make more for supper since I seemed to like it so much.

The thing that surprises me the most, though, is the fact that he washed the dishes by himself. Alfred told me a few weeks ago that Ludwig was complaining about how Gilbert never cleans up after himself. Honestly, Gilbert does strike me as the type of guy who would be a little lazy and not clean up as often.

When he is done, he comes and lays on the couch with me. With our feet outstretched on the long bed, we turn on the television and watch whatever is playing on ESPN. It's nothing that interesting; I think they're reporting on the upcoming Thanksgiving Day game. Soon, I find myself nodding off.

For about four hours, I find myself sleeping on and off. I always lay my head on Gilbert's firm shoulder and wake up there. Sometimes he is talking to me; just telling me some random thing about school or sports or something. Other times, he would simply brush the hair from my face and shoot me a smile that could make my heart melt.

At about four-thirty, I fall asleep and don't wake up until about five fifteen. Coming back into the real world, I shift a little causing Gilbert to do the same. He brushes the hair that has yet again fallen in front of my face and smiles as I open my eyes.

"Hey, Birdie," he greets, "You hungry? It's a little after five and I was thinking about making some of that awesome soup again!" I smile tiredly at his enthusiasm and nod. Gilbert's smile deepens and he gently lays me back on the couch before getting off the bed and going into the kitchen. Still a little draggy and tired, I feel like a doll being placed and moved around by its owner. I smile a bit at the thought.

I guess I nodded off yet again as I wake up to a giant yell from the kitchen. Startled, I jerk around and peer through the doorway to the kitchen to see what has caused the commotion. "Shit!" I hear, "I burned my fucking finger again! Not. Awesome!" Forgetting my tiredness, I jump off the bed and rush to the kitchen only to find a very angry Gilbert clutching his hand. It's beet red and starting to swell.

In about five seconds tops, I have a cold wet cloth wrapped in ice placed on his finger. He blinks in surprise at my fast reaction, but quickly grits his teeth through the pain I know he's feeling. "Damn... That hurts," he grunts unconsciously inching away from me. Finally, he begins to move too far away and I tuck the cloth into his other hand without moving the ice off the burn.

I then make my way to the stove and turn it off, trying to save myself from another fire. I bring the pot to the sink and empty it out, watching the steam dance through the air. Sighing, I turn to face Gilbert who has discarded the ice and is now sucking on the burnt hand. I want to tell him to put the ice back on, but I can't and I don't think he would anyway.

"Kesesese," he laughs making that cackling sound I love so much, "I guess the stove was unawesome to me, huh? Well, I just go try again. No harm done, right? Well, except for my hand, but I'm so awesome I'll heal quickly."

I shake my head impatiently and motion for him to sit down at the table. Giving me a confused look, he sits down but does not take his eyes off of me. The dizziness of the fever comes back, but I ignore it as I pull two TV meals out of the freezer. I know it's not the gourmet stuff he's probably used to, but it's all I have. And deep down, I know he'll love me anyway. He might be conceited, but he's really nice once you get to know him!

I heat up both meals quickly as they only take about two minutes each to warm up in our little microwave. I also pull out the hot chocolate and make two glasses before I bring the meal over to the table. As I expected, Gilbert smiles broadly. "This looks awesome, Mattie!" he shouts, "And you made hot chocolate! Now _this_ is a meal." The weird thing is that his gushing does not sound forced. Instead, it sounds like he really, truly means it. I smile back as we eat our meager dinner.

When we are done, all I have to do is clean out the hot chocolate cups and throw the disposable trays away. Sighing, I decide to forget about the pot I still haven't cleaned thoroughly. My headache is back and all I want to do is lay down. I start to sway a little and make my way for the living room.

Gilbert follows me and plops down on the couch next to me. Taking a notepad and pen off the coffee table, he begins to write. When he is finished, he shows me a sheet of paper with the title _Awesome Thanksgiving Ideas_. I smile and remember that Thanksgiving is only two days away.

"Okay, so my family is so unawesome, so I'm gonna spend it here with you," Gilbert declares, "And we have to make it awesome. So I was thinking dinosaur chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, chicken noodle soup, and Spaghetti-O's. Forget all this 'turkey' and 'family' shit, you know? Awesome, huh? And we can watch football and stuff."

Dinosaur chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, chicken noodle soup, and Spaghetti-O's? That is nothing like the Thanksgivings I've had before. Al and I always had Thanksgiving with our aunt and we always had a turkey. This seems rather... Different, but nice. I smile and nod enthusiastically at the idea. Gilbert smiles.

I am about to take the notepad and add chips to the list, when I begin to cough violently again. Gilbert ditches the notepad and pulls me close to him. He pats me on the back and whispers, "It's alright, Mattie. Just let it all out. Awesome is here." I try to nod as the coughs shake my body, but find it just looks like I'm having a seizure.

When the coughing ends, I slump deeper into Gilbert's arms, utterly exhausted, and bury myself into his sleeve. He continues to rub my back and I feel myself beginning to fall asleep. Before I can, though, Gilbert pulls me off of him. He doesn't lay me down, though, like I expect him to. Instead, his lips crash against my own which catches me completely off guard. My eyes widen, but I press back. We break apart and he smiles at me.

"I love you," he whispers. I nod, still a little shocked as he looked me over. "You must be tired, Birdie," he says, "You should go to sleep. Awesome will be here in the morning." I smile back knowing my expression is weak and tired as I lay down on the bed. I shoot back up before he can place a blanket over me and grab the whiteboard sitting on the coffee table.

"What is it?" Gilbert asks worried. I imagine for a moment as I write what I want to say that he is probably worried that I am going to throw up or need to go to a hospital or something. I finish writing and hand the board to him.

_I love you too._

Gilbert smiles. "This is awesome, Birdie," he whispers. "Now get some rest." He pecks me on the forehead as I lay back down. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I begin to drift off. The last think I remember is the light shutting off, a blanket being draped over me, and two strong, protective arms wrapping around me as we fall into a wonderful sleep.

* * *

_I actually had to add the word 'unawesome' to my dictionary on Open Office because the line kept annoying me xD Thank you, Prussia~_

_I hope you liked this chapter~ Dunno how many more there will be... And it will be another wait for an update~ Sorry D:  
_

_So, please review~ I love getting reviews 'cause they make me so happy n' stuff C: So please, please do so if you get the chance and have the time. Not only are you making me feel awesome, you're also helping me improve my writing which is why I write in the first place :)  
_


	11. Awesome Pizza and UnAwesome Brothers

**New Chapter yay! It's long... xD Sorry for the lag in updates! I had a HUGE speech and debate turni yesterday and Friday! It was soooo long Dx**

**This chapter is dedicated to Maddie who is the district champ in Lincoln Douglas Debate! I know you'll never read this, but you're amazing xD**

**Anyway, please enjoy! Warning: Much swearing!

* * *

  
**

The next morning, I wake up to find that I can actually breathe. Gilbert is still fast asleep and I am snuggled into his chest as he has protective hold around me. I simply lay there, not wanting to move as I breathe in the wonderful smell that is uniquely his. I feel so safe and comfortable. I don't know when I have ever felt this safe before.

I force my breathing to fall into sync with his, but it only lasts a few moments. My cold is not completely gone and I begin to cough rather loudly. I try to bury my mouth in the blankets to keep quiet so Gilbert doesn't wake up. It doesn't work, though, and I feel Gilbert shift and I know that I accidentally woke him up. Lazily, I feel him rubbing my back in circles as the coughing begins to subside. I look up and am met by tired, ruby red eyes.

"Hey Birdie," he whispers. His voice is tired and sounds grainy and dry. "Feeling any better?" I nod and unconsciously snuggle closer to his warm body. I am not sure what exactly causes me to do this. Maybe it's the cold that I imagine I will feel if he leaves my side. He gives me a squeeze before pushing the blankets off himself and getting off the bed. I wince at the cold from the lack of another person next to me even after he wraps the blanket back around me.

I sigh and sit up as I watch Gilbert returning with a thermometer, some pills, and a glass of water. I take the thermometer and place it in my mouth as I examine the pill warily. I always hated taking pills. But, I know that I need to take them or else I won't get better.

While waiting for the thermometer to beep, I see Gilbert disappear into the bathroom. I can tell that he is certainly not a morning person. He is walking slowly and dragging his feet. Plus, he isn't making full eye contact with me. He usually does as he has _so_ much self confidence.

Gilbert comes back out of the bathroom looking a little more awake, but still irritable. I can tell that he's trying to play down his grouchy natures as he shoots me a tired smile. I try to smile back, juggling the thermometer in my mouth. Suddenly it beeps and I jump, startled at the sudden noise. Gilbert chuckles slightly and walks over to take the thermometer.

"99.1," Gilbert tells me, "That's good 'cause we have to go shopping for our awesome Thanksgiving." He gives me a wary thumbs up. "It's eight by the way and I'm starving." He looks at me expectantly and I sigh. I guess I should just be happy he's not going to try to help.

As I walk into the kitchen, I wonder a little about Thanksgiving. I'm not really going to miss Alfred too much because we never really celebrated the holiday. I'm actually just wondering if Gilbert's family is alright with him staying with me for the week and Thanksgiving. Isn't Thanksgiving supposed to be spent with family? I silently hope that his Grandfather doesn't mind.

Pushing my thoughts aside, I open the freezer and pull out four heat-up pancakes. They're the Eggo brand, and don't taste the best, but I'm not in the mood to cook. My head still feels a little foggy and I'm still trying to shake off my tiredness. Gilbert sees me taking the fake pancakes out of the fridge, but smiles. I'm guessing that he doesn't really mind.

In a little less than two minutes, the pancakes are done. I set two on each plate and bring them over to the table. Gilbert smiles up at me with those red eyes. I blush and grab two glasses of milk from the fridge and place them on the table as I slide into my seat.

"So, what do we need for Thanksgiving?" Gilbert asks after swallowing a bite of pancake, "I really want some dinosaur chicken nuggets! Those are amazing! And we need some Spaghetti-O's, but you have some, don't you?" At this I nod, wondering what kind of Thanksgiving he is used to. What about the turkey?

Seeing my confused face, he smiles. "We don't need a turkey," he says, reading my mind like he usually does, "They cost a shit load of money and I don't like them anyway. Besides, chicken nuggets are fucking awesome! We need more dinosaurs in our lives." he waves a fork with a piece of pancake attached to the end as though he is saying something important. I laugh at his comments and nibble on a bite of pancake. It doesn't taste great, but it's not too horrible.

"Anyway, we should get to the store as soon as possible," Gilbert continues, "Because we need to get our stuff. And the place will be packed with lazy-assed people who didn't get their shit before hand." He pauses. "Like us, but we're more awesome." Smirking, he takes another bite of pancake.

I finish before him, not being very hungry due to the effects of the cold. He looks at me worriedly when he sees me starting to get up. Glancing down, I notice that I haven't really eaten very much. I had give us each two pancakes and I had only eaten half of one. I smile, though, and whisk the plate away before he can comment. Placing the plate and the glass in the sink, I pull out a notepad and a pen and jot something down. I bring it back to the table where Gilbert is waiting eagerly. I can tell that he wants me to use writing to speak more often and I really want to make him happy.

"_I'll eat more later. Right now, I'm just not that hungry,"_ I wrote, _"Do you want to pick something up at the store or go out? I'm fine with either."_

Gilbert smile widens as he reads the note and hands me back the paper. He motions for me to sit and I do so, my pen in hand and ready to reply. It feels good knowing that I can converse with Gilbert without actually having to speak. It is a temporary fix to a seemingly permanent problem.

"Alright, Birdie," Gilbert smiles, "If you're not hungry, then don't eat. You're not going to throw up, though, are you? That wouldn't be awesome." I shake my head 'no' and he continues, "Well, then I think we should go out to eat! Eating out is awesome! Where do you want to go?"

_"It doesn't really matter to me,"_ I write, _"I'm fine with anything... Just not McDonald's. I don't particularly like it."_

"We wouldn't go there," Gilbert responds, rolling his eyes, "I know that idiot of a brother probably forces it down your throat, but I wouldn't do that to you." Pausing, he taps his finger on his chin. "Maybe we could go for pizza with my brother and his boyfriend. Feli's Grandpa owns an Italian restaurant downtown. If that's alright with you, of course. It wouldn't be awesome to make you do something you don't want to do."

I look at him for a moment before turning my gaze towards the opposite wall to think. I haven't had pizza in a while, but I'm not sure if I would be comfortable going to lunch with people I didn't really know. So, I decide to beat around the bush.

_"Isn't your brother with Alfred on that football field trip to Canada?" _I ask.

Gilbert shakes his head. "Actually, no," he sighs, "It would have been nice, huh? But my Gramps said that he couldn't go 'cause he needed him at the brewery. Feliciano's Grandpa tried to convince him otherwise, but he wouldn't budge." Rolling his eyes, he pulls at a loose strand of hair. "He always was a pretty stubborn man. It sucks. Luddy was mad, but didn't show it. That's what sucks more; I woulda been pissed."

I nod sympathetically, knowing that Gilbert probably would have been mad if his grandfather didn't let him do something. For a moment, I wonder if he approves of Gilbert staying with me this week. I can guess he probably isn't happy about it, but I also know that Gil is probably staying with me anyway, despite his grandfather.

_"He doesn't mind you being here, does he?"_ I write nervously. I'd feel really bad if I was helping Gilbert defy his grandfather.

"Yeah, he does," Gilbert scoffed, "But I don't care. He just doesn't see that I'm old enough to do whatever the hell I want." Pausing he gives me a smile. "It doesn't matter, though, so don't worry about it. Now, do you want to go or not? If you're not comfortable, that's awesome. We can go by ourselves."

_"Yeah, I'll go, I guess."_

"They're nice, I promise. My brother can be a bit of a prick sometimes and Feli's a little... Special, but they're nice." Gilbert shoots me a reassuring smile. "Besides, I'm awesome!" I try to smile back, hoping my fake smiling skills wouldn't fail me. This is going to be a rather long day.

* * *

We stopped at the supermarket first. I grabbed the cart out of the way simply to keep Gilbert out of the basket. Sure, we weren't going to get a whole lot of things, but the store was far too crowded to be pushing a tall German teenager around in a cart like an idiot who couldn't keep his boyfriend under control. Yes, he pouted, but I stood firm. Eventually, he gave up trying to climb into the basket. I had a little help, too. He stopped after the basket tipped over.

Now with the groceries purchased and Gilbert with a bruised bum, we find ourselves in a small pizza shop off a main street I never caught the name of. A cheery Italian man is smiling at us with a smaller, younger version of him, sitting across from Gilbert and I. Next to the smaller Italian is a German boy with pale blonde hair and bright blue eyes. He and Gilbert don't look very much alike, but you can tell they are siblings by the way they bicker.

"_Großvater _wants you home right now!" Ludwig shouts when we enter the small shop and slide into the bench across from him and Feliciano. "What are you thinking, Gilbert? Running off with your friend and no word to us!"

"Oh, _Opa_ can shove it," Gilbert sighs rolling his eyes, "I'm too awesome to do what that stick in the mud says." This only made Ludwig glare dangerously at him.

"You know better than to run off without telling us where you're going!" Ludwig growls, "Why am I always the one looking out after you? You never act mature! Why am I always the older one?"

"Hey, guys?" The younger Italian asks timidly, "Can't we all just be friends?" He peers up at Ludwig. "Please don't fight with your brother, Luddy! Please? You're family! And as family, you have to be best friends!"

"That's right," the older Italian nods, "Now, what will you guys be having? It's on the house, of course." He pulls a notepad out of his pocket, his other hand equipped with a pen.

Gilbert looks around the table. "Coke?" he asks. We all nod, Feliciano mumbling a happy "yes!" "Four awesome cokes!" Gilbert smirks at our waiter, "And one large pizza."

"And what would you like on this pizza?" Feliciano's grandfather asks us.

"Cheese and Tomatoes, of course!" Feliciano shouts excitedly causing the people at a closer table to turn and look at us.

"How about we just get it with everything?" Ludwig suggests rationally, "That way, we don't have to waste time choosing toppings and we can pick off whatever we don't like." Again, we all nod. Ludwig repeats that to the Italian waiter who rushes off to go cook our pizza.

"Your Grandpa makes the most awesome pizza awesome, Feli!" Gilbert declares, "It's been a while since I've had it. And Birdie here had never had it! Can you believe that?" Gilbert turns to me. "You haven't _liv__ed _you've had Grandpa Vargas' pizza!" Turning back to the table, he smirks at Ludwig and Feliciano. "It's almost as good as Mattie's pancakes. Now, those are good." Still smirking, his eyes shine with teasing amusement when he looks Ludwig in the eyes. "_Orgasmic_, even. Kinda like your porn that Kiku gives you."

Ludwig turns bright red and growls at his brother. "I-I don't know what you're talking about, Gilbert," he growls, "I don't read porn!"

"Luddy, what's 'porn?'" Feliciano asks innocently. Ludwig's blush deepens and he coughs nervously.

"I-It's n-nothing. Don't worry about it," he stammers, looking down at the table and fiddling with his shirt. After a moment of awkward silence, he glares back up at Gilbert. "See what you do?" he asks angrily, "You put things into Feli's head. He's innocent right now. Don't go corrupting him!"

"I'm corrupting him? What kind of idiot doesn't know what porn is?"

"Don't call him an idiot! Dammit, Feliciano, stand up for yourself!"

"S-Sorry, Luddy!"

I look down uncomfortably while Gilbert and Ludwig argue. Feliciano turns to me and smiles, forcing me to look up and into his half closed eyes. "_B__uon giorno_!" He says happily, "Hello! I'm Feliciano, but you can just call me Feli! I don't think we've ever been introduced. I love pasta, sleeping, and food!" He looks at me innocently, as though asking me to continue the conversation. I simply nod.

"Oh! That's right!" Feliciano shouts embarrassed, "I forgot; you don't speak. I'm sorry! I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable! Ludwig always tells me that I can't read the atmosphere. It's alright, I won't make you talk. I heard about what happened in Mrs. Plum's class. I'm so sorry!" He looks upset and I want to calm him down. So, I take his hand and smile hoping that he'll feel better. He looks up at me and smiles knowingly, before I take my hands off of his and look back to Gilbert and Ludwig hoping they have stopped fighting.

Thankfully before another argument starts up, Feliciano's grandfather comes back with our drinks and a large pizza. It smells delicious and I find myself hungry. I inwardly sigh with relief knowing that my cold is going away and that I'm actually hungry. I also feel very happy that I can smell things again.

Taking a small sip of soda, I sit back and make room for the pizza. A small white plate is placed in front of me by tanned hands. A set of pale white hands places a piece of pizza on my plate. Looking up, I see Gilbert and he smiles as he puts a slice on his own plate.

I, of course, eat in silence as does Feliciano. Gilbert and Ludwig bicker with each other some more before Feliciano threatens to never make pasta for Ludwig again if he continues to fight. Looking at Ludwig's face, I can tell that he probably doesn't care but also doesn't want Feliciano to be sad.

"I'm sorry, Feli," he sighs, "I really hope you make pasta for me again, so I won't fight any more." The words seem almost scripted, but it works nevertheless.

"Of course!" Feliciano claps. "I'll make some for Thanksgiving tomorrow!"

"But, Feli, we eat _turkey_ on Thanksgiving," Ludwig reminds the small Italian. As Feliciano's face starts to crumple, Ludwig throws his hands in the air and places them on Feli's shoulders. "B-But if you want to make pasta, you can." Ludwig tries to smile.

"Really?" Ludwig nods. "Yay! I can't wait, Luddy! I'll make the best pasta ever!"

"All your pasta is the best ever," Ludwig sighs, blushing. This in turn causes Feliciano to blush as well. It also causes Gilbert to crack up.

"You two could be in a soap opera," Gilbert chuckles as he nudges me, "Huh, Mattie?"

"Really? You think so?" Feliciano smacks his hands together in happiness, "That would be wonderful, don't you think so Luddy?" Ludwig says nothing and looks away out of embarrassment brought on by his brother.

"Hey, Gilly?" Feliciano asks cutely, "Are you and Matt going out?" He tilts his head to the side innocently. I blush at the question and look to Ludwig for help, but he is too busy staring at the floor.

"Fuck, yeah we are!" Gilbert shouts earning a glare from a mother a few tables away. Ludwig glances up and glares at him as well.

"Language, Gilbert," he growls.

"Oh, stop treating him like a baby," Gilbert rolls his eyes, "He's just a few months younger than you."

Sighing, Ludwig turns to me for the first time. "Are you really dating my brother?" he asks curiously. I nod with a slight blush lingering on my cheeks and look down. "Well, good luck. My _bruder_ can be a bit of a jerk. I wonder how you put up with him."

"He puts up with me because I'm awesome and he's awesome and we're awesome together!" Gilbert flashes him a smirk. "What? Am I not allowed to be in a relationship?"

"No, you're allowed, but I wonder what _Großvater _will say when he finds out," Ludwig says thoughtfully, "I mean, he was rather upset when he found out I was dating Feli. It took him a good year to finally accept us."

"Yeah, but that's only because: one, he's a prick and two, he hates Feli's Grandpa with a burning passion," Gilbert retorts. "Mattie's parents probably never fucked anything up, so he should be cool with it."

"Still, you should be careful," Ludwig warns, "He's already angry at you. Don't do anything stupid tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? Oh right, I meant to tell you," Gilbert says, "I'm having Thanksgiving with Mattie tomorrow." He smirks as Ludwig smacks his forehead with his palm and sighs heavily.

"And _that_ is exactly the type of stupid thing I was trying to tell you not to do," Ludwig growls from behind his hand, "Are you crazy? _Großvater _will kill you."

"No he won't," Gilbert shrugs, "Feli is taking my place, right?"

"Feli is _not_ 'taking your place,'" Ludwig glares, "He's just coming over because Grandfather Vargas is going on a business trip and his brother is going over a friend's house. But you are expected to attend our Thanksgiving dinner."

"Well, sorry, but awesome me is going over Mattie's house while his stupid brother is away," Gilbert informs him, "We're having dinosaur chicken nuggets and Spaghetti-O's! Awesome huh?"

"Ve! Very awesome!" Feliciano throws in, "We should join them, huh, Luddy? Can we? It would be so fun! I could bring pasta!"

"No!" Ludwig shouted forcefully, "_Großvater _wants us at _home_ for Thanksgiving."

"Fine, fine, fine," Gilbert sighed, waving his hand around, brushing away his brother, "It will just be me and Mattie, then." Glancing at a tomato shaped clock on the wall he smiles and grabs the sleeve of the jacket I am wearing. "We need to get going. We have a Thanksgiving to prepare. Plus, it's getting late and you're just getting over a cold."

"A cold?" Feliciano asks worriedly. "Oh, are you alright? You shouldn't be out in this weather! It's getting much colder now!"

I nod apologetically. "He's alright," Gilbert assures him, "We bundled up and shit. But we really should be going home, just to be sure." He turns to me and smiles. "You ready?" I nod and grab onto his arm. He pulls me out of the booth and waves goodbye to Ludwig and Feliciano. I do the same and even give a small smile.

Gilbert walks me to his car and I get in the passenger's seat. Gilbert shoots me happy look as he pulls out of the spot in front of the shop he had claimed. "Did you have fun?" he asks once we're on the road.

I nod and sigh happily, leaning back against the seat. It's late and rather dark out. The streetlights draw long shadows inside our car. My shadow and Gilbert's grow long and mix together. I smile at the sight and sigh. It had been a long day, and I'm tired. I allow my eyes to close as I snuggle into my seat.

The next thing I know, I am being carried by someone. Opening my eyes and looking up, I see Gilbert carrying me. We're on the stairs of my apartment building and Gilbert is carrying me bridal-style. I snuggle into his arm and sigh.

"Hey, Birdie," he whispers, "It's been a long day, so we're just gonna go to bed. Just relax and go to sleep. We'll have an awesome day tomorrow!" Nodding, I snuggle closer to him and begin to nod off. As I fall asleep once again, I realize that I am doing what he asks simply because I trust him. I haven't trusted anyone in a while.

* * *

**Translations: **

**_Bruder: _(German) For brother**

**_B__uon giorno_****: (Italian) Hello **

_**Großvater **_**an****d _Opa:_ Here's the story with these. is a more formal term, one that I think Ludwig would use. _Opa_ is more formal and I think that Gil would be, well less formal xD  
(Please tell me if I screwed this up xD)**

**Next chapter is Thanksgiving! Whoo! Be excited! I am so tired right now, so here's just a quick Author's note.**

**First, updates will be slow. Like, really, really slow! Sorry! I have been so busy lately! D;**

**Second, sorry for the OOC-ness. I tried really hard, but I don't think I got it. ;A;**

**Anyway, please review! I love getting them! The support i have gotten for this is amazing and I love you all~  
**


	12. An Awesome Thanksgiving

_Yay snowdays~ Whoo~ So, here's the next chapter! Thank you SO much for the reviews!_

_Sorry for any OOC-ness_

_And enjoy~_

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The next morning, I awake with Gilbert's arms around me. My back is against his chest and we are fit together like puzzle pieces. Upon waking and feeling the comfort, I sigh happily and shift closer to him. He stirs and snuggles into my hair, but stays asleep.

Suddenly, I remember that it is Thanksgiving and Gilbert and I are going to enjoy a wonderful day here together. Another happy sigh escapes me as I imagine everything that we're going to do today. Sure, there might not be any turkey, but we have Spaghetti-O's and chicken nuggets. I also think I have some mac n' cheese that we can heat up.

Shifting slightly, I peek over the blankets and check the time. It's almost nine! So, with a sigh, I remove myself from the bed being careful not to disturb Gilbert. I make my way to the bathroom so I can take a quick shower before the day really starts.

When I finish my shower, I stand in the middle of the bathroom putting my clothes on. With a blush, I realize that I forgot to bring my shirt in! Now I have to leave the bathroom without a shirt and run into my room.

I peek out of the room cautiously and see a lump on the bed. I pray that it's Gilbert still sleeping and rush out of the room, feeling the cold air against my bare chest. I'm almost to my room when I hear a noise in the kitchen.

"Birdie?" an all too familiar voice calls, "Are you done in the bathroom? The awesome me needs to show-" I freeze and he appears in the doorway between the kitchen and living room. His mouth hangs open and I feel every inch of me turning red. Finally, his mouth closes and he smirks walking over to me haughtily.

He passes by me, smacking my butt, and saying, "Damn, Birdie, you're sexy." Before walking into the bathroom. I jump and run into my bedroom as embarrassed as ever.

It takes me a few minutes more than usual to get myself ready, but that is simply because I'm so embarrassed. I realize that I can't stay in my bedroom all day and need to get everything ready for our meal. Plus, I don't want Gilbert to worry

I walk out into the living room and glance around, seeing Gilbert with his back to me folding up the couch. He scoops up the blankets and turns around, looking at me. He smirks and moves past me into my bedroom and places the blankets on my bed before returning to the living room.

"I think it would be much more awesome to eat on the couch," he explains, "Now, we just need to get ready and we'll be all set. What time do you want to eat? Does one sound awesome?" I nod, not really caring when we eat. I head into the kitchen to set everything up.

When I finish sorting everything, I have six cans of Spaghetti-O's, two boxes of mac n' cheese, and three boxes of dinosaur chicken nuggets. I also have orange soda, hot chocolate, and coke to drink. Gilbert comes by to inspect everything and decides that it's all "awesome" and that I should get started cooking.

What does he do? He plops himself in front of the television and turns on football. I don't really care, though. I should probably be happy he's not going to try to help. I don't need the apartment burning down on Thanksgiving. Besides, that's what Alfred has always done; I cook and he watches television.

I am heating up the water for the mac n' cheese and cooking the chicken nuggets in the oven at the same time. While I wait for the water to boil, I place the Spaghetti-O's in the microwave and turn it on. I then rush over to the cabinet and grab two packets of hot chocolate mix before placing two mugs on the table. The microwave beeps and I take out the hot bowl and replace it with another.

I am doing so many things at one time, I don't really pay much attention to how close I am to the stove. Without thinking, I place my hand down, not really thinking about where exactly I am putting it.

Suddenly, a burning sensation rips through me and I cry out, clutching my hand. Looking down, I see that I placed my hand right on the burner. My hand is now red and hot. Looking up, I see Gilbert crashing into the kitchen. He looks at me and then at my hand before diving for it and sticking it under cold water.

"What happened? Are you alright?" he presses as the cold water hits my hand like tiny knives. I whimper from the pain and a tear streaks down my cheek. Gilbert looks down at me and brushes it away with a sigh. "I'm sorry, Birdie, but we have to cool it off. Keep it under the water while I grab some bandages." I nod and force myself to keep my burnt hand under the water.

Using my other hand, I grab a pen and paper and write down exactly what drawer they are in. Glancing at the note, he rushes to the second drawer on the right and pulls out the beige bandage. He comes back to me, grabs a towel, and begins to dry off my red hand before wrapping it up. I am still sniffling because it really hurts. He looks down at me and sighs, pulling me into a huge hug.

"Be more careful, Birdie," he tells me, "That could have been not awesome. Now, let's finish making dinner." He pulls away and smiles, his hands on my shoulders. I bring myself to look up at him and smile too. Ruffling my hair, he turns to the stove and puts the mac n' cheese mix into the pot.

We finish dinner quickly and begin to set the table. I place down the final plate of dinosaur chicken nuggets when there is a knock at the door. Gilbert looks at me and motions for me to get the door. I give him a shocked look. I never answer the door. Answering the door means talking to people and that is something I don't do.

Then I remember the promise, sigh, and make my way to the door. Before I open it, there is another knock, this time louder and more urgent followed by a deep voiced shout at whoever was knocking. I click the door open and pull it aside to fine a tall, scowling blonde haired boy and a shorter, more excited looking brunette Italian.

"Feli? Luddy?" Gilbert asks coming up behind me. Ludwig sighs and Feliciano waves.

"Ve! Hello, Gilbert!" the Italian exclaims, "Can we come in? I brought pasta!" He motions with the container he has in his hands. I nod and step aside to let the two in before shutting the door. Turning around, I see Gilbert giving Ludwig a curious look.

"What are you doing here?" he asks, "I thought you were having Thanksgiving with _Opa_."

At this Ludwig sighs and glares at him. "We were," he explains, "But then he got very mad that you weren't coming and decided not to celebrate Thanksgiving. Feliciano came over with pasta and suggested we go over here per your invitation yesterday."

"Awesome!" Gilbert shouts, taking the pasta from Feliciano and setting it on the table. "The more the merrier! We can set this up buffet style and eat on the couch while watching football!" Feliciano claps his hands together and Ludwig sighs again as they venture further into my apartment.

I run into the kitchen and pull out two more plates, handing one to Ludwig and one to Feliciano. As Feli takes the plate, he looks down at my hand. "What happened, Mattie?" he asks worriedly, "You're hand has a bandage!" Ludwig hears this and turns to Gilbert questioningly.

Gilbert opens his mouth to speak, but I throw my hand in the air. He gives me a quizzical look, but clamps it shut. Taking a deep breath, I grab the whiteboard he bought me and begin to write. My hand is shaking and my writing comes out very messy, but it's still readable. I'm really nervous. I've only ever written for Alfred and Gilbert. When I finish, I hand the whiteboard to Feliciano and look at him, praying I didn't mess anything up.

_I burnt my hand making the mac n' cheese. It's alright now, so don't worry. Sorry for worrying you._

Feliciano breaks into a huge smile and throws his arms around me, pulling me into a huge hug. "Thank you for telling me!" He exclaims. I feel myself blush a few shades of red, but awkwardly return the hug. I look up at Ludwig and Gilbert. Ludwig looks surprised and Gilbert is smirking.

"That's my Birdie," he says, "Good job! You did awesome!" He pauses to let Ludwig pull Feliciano off of me. "Now, are you ready to eat? We've got a bunch of awesome hot food that better not go to waste." Feliciano laughs and nods. Even Ludwig gives a small smile.

We pack our plates full of food and sit down on the couch. Normally, the couch only sits three people, but Feliciano is small enough that we all fit on. It's a tight squeeze, but it's still comfortable. Gilbert wraps one arm around me as I eat my food. He turns on the television to football, but I glare and take the remote, changing it to hockey.

Everyone looks at me, surprised at my action. "It's Thanksgiving, Birdie," Gilbert explains, "We should watch football." He takes the remote and changes the station, but I grab it right back. Glaring playfully at me, Gilbert takes it, changes the station and holds it up high above his head. I smile back and place my food on the coffee table, ready for a fight. Standing up, I grab at the remote, but he tries to keep it away from me. Ludwig and Feliciano watch, Ludwig with disdain and Feliciano with happiness.

Finally I grab the remote, change the station back to hockey and sit on it so Gilbert can't get it. He smirks down at me and laughs. I begin to laugh as well.

"You're a fighter, you know that?" he asks, "Fine, we can watch hockey." I smile and rest my head on his shoulder, popping a dinosaur chicken nugget into my mouth.

As we eat, Feliciano goes on about pasta. I listen intently, somewhat interested. Ludwig is giving him a fake smile, probably having heard this rant a few times before. Gilbert looks bored to death.

Suddenly, Feliciano turns to me. "Hey, Mattie, do you like the pasta I made?" he asks me hopefully. I could just nod yes, but I'm feeling so confident that I pick up my whiteboard and begin to write.

_Yes, I loved it. What is in it, if you don't mind me asking._

Feliciano beams and begins to tell me all the ingredients that he used. Some I recognize, but a few I have no idea what they are. I smile and nod anyway, seeing how excited Feliciano has become.

When we are done with our meal, I pick up all the plates and carry them into the kitchen, turning on the water to wash them off. Gilbert comes up behind me and wraps his hand around my waist, pulling me away from the sink. Blinking, I look up, trying to figure out what he is trying to do.

"We can do the dishes later," he tells me, "Right now, let's just enjoy the day." I smile and let him lead me into the living room where Ludwig and Feliciano are. Feliciano is sitting on Ludwig's lap, his head resting on the German's shoulder. Gilbert sits down next to them, pulling me onto his lap as well.

None of us kiss or make our or anything. Instead, we just cuddle on the couch until about eight. Ludwig announces that it's time to go and Feliciano protests, but accepts that they have to leave. He gives me another hug. "Thank you for talking to me today," he smiles, "I hope you and Gilly have a lot of fun, ve?" I laugh and hug him back as Ludwig pulls him off of me yet again.

"_Großvater_ is going to be angry, you know," Ludwig sighs turning to Gilbert. "But... Thank you for a nice meal." At this Gilbert smirks and slaps his back.

"Yeah, I know," Gilbert replies, "But I don't really care. And you're welcome. I know; we're awesome!" Ludwig sighs again, placing his hand on his head, but gives us a very faint smile. They wave goodbye, gather their things, and leave. I wave back feeling pretty proud of myself. Gilbert comes around and places his arm around my shoulder.

"Now, where were we?" he asks, pulling me over to the couch and setting me down before showering me in kisses. I grab my whiteboard and write, handing it to him.

_I think we were just getting started..._

I add a small winking face at the end of my sentence and smirk. That's when Gilbert pounces on me, calling me sexy and hot and all sorts of things I know I'm not, but believe I am simply because Gilbert tells me so.

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The night goes by quickly and soon, it is morning. Friday morning to be exact and the day Alfred comes home. His bus is supposed to drop him off late, though, so Gilbert and I spend the morning cuddling and enjoying each other.

I'm so wrapped up in him, I think I hear the door's lock click, but brush it off. Gilbert has his lips firmly planted on mine and I don't think twice about it.

Suddenly, I hear a voice I haven't heard in a while. "Hey, Mattie! I'm ho-" Gilbert and I shoot away from each other and we stare in shock at Alfred who is staring right back at us, his mouth wide open. His suitcase hits the floor with a _thunk_.

"Oh, hey!" Gilbert says casually, "What's up? How'd your football thing go? Have fun in your tights, playing with balls?" He smirks and I watch as Alfred's face goes from shocked to annoyed.

"What the _fuck_ are you doing with my little brother?"

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_Oh, Shit's going down... o.o Al's not happy..._

_Anyway, let's all be grateful for snowdays! Whoo! I AM NOT MAKING ANY PROMISES... But I might update again this weekend._

_Uhm... BAW Feli~ BAW Gilly~ And yay, Mattie is beginning to gain some confidence.~_

_So, review if you have the time! You're reviews make me so happy! I'm almost to 100~ How amazing is that? Thank you again!  
_


	13. UnAwesome Families

_100 REVIEWS! Thank you all SO SO SO MUCH! I feel so excited right now xD Thank you, thank you ouo!_

_I don't have much to say except that I'm tired OTL xD So, enjoy~

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I sit there in shock looking from Alfred to Gilbert. Gilbert has this stupid smirk on his face and Alfred looks so angry. I haven't seen him this angry since the doctors told us-No, never mind. I push the thought from my head and wait for something to happen. I hate it. It's too quiet. No one is moving; we're barely breathing.

"So... Want some pancakes?" Gilbert asks suddenly. I slap my forehead with my palm. When your boyfriend's brother is fuming mad because you kissed him, you don't offer said brother _pancakes_. I turn back to Alfred and he looks surprised for a moment, but then turns back to being really, really angry.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" Alfred growls dangerously, "And what the fuck are you doing with my brother?" I look at him pleadingly, begging him not to do anything rash, but he doesn't look at me. Instead, he's staring knives into Gilbert who doesn't seem phased in the least.

"Uhm...," Gilbert thinks, "Let's see... While you were out in Canada or where ever, I was making sure your brother wasn't lonely. You know, because I guess I'm just a better big bro then you are." At this he smirks. "And then we went to a carnival, but he caught a cold and got all unawesomely sick."

"What do you mean 'sick?'" Alfred glares.

"Oh, he just got some cold," Gilbert waves completely leaving out the part about Francis and Antonio, "But I, like the awesome person I am, took care of him. And then we had an awesome Thanksgiving! We had dinosaur chicken nuggets, mac n' cheese... Oh! And Feli brought over some pasta... That was pretty awesome!"

Alfred blinks in shock. Gilbert smirks at his shocked face and Alfred's turns angry yet again. "And what were you doing making out with my brother like that?"

"Oh, yeah," Gilbert grins, "Well, you see... When two people are going out, you tend to do that. It's an expression of love or some shit like that. What? I didn't rape him or anything!"

Alfred's growls. "Get out of my house!" Alfred yells, venom clear in his voice. "_Now_." Looking at him, I can see his face red with anger and his fists clenched tightly.

Gilbert smirks again and I know that he is going to say something sarcastic. "Well, Al," he grins, "I think that's up to Birdie here. This is his house too, you know. He invited the awesome me in, he gets to throw the awesome me out." I give him a look; although what he is saying is generally true. The only flaw in his argument is the fact that I didn't really 'invite' him in. He sorta decided that he would be staying with me on his own; not that I mind! I'm just saying!

Alfred simply stares at him, unable to rebuke the argument. This apartment really is as much mine as it is his. Still, I can tell Alfred is not going down without a fight. "I said to get out!" Alfred shouts, stomping in frustration.

Gilbert stands up, obviously bored with annoying my brother. Without thinking, I stand up along with him. I turn to him and clutch his sleeve. He turns around and smiles at me. Forgetting my brother is even in the room, I reach up and peck Gilbert on the cheek. This only causes him to give me a kiss on the lips and a thumbs up before beginning to walk out the door. Flashing a final smirk at Alfred he says, "The awesome me is out! Bye, Birdie!" before walking out the door.

When the door shuts, Alfred's eyes flicker to me. I see shock and anger in his eyes as I feel my face heating up. Honestly, I am a little frightened. I know he's not going to hurt me or anything, but I can't stand the thought of my brother being angry at me. We don't fight too often and when we do, it tears me apart. So, I grab the whiteboard and begin to write.

_"Welcome home, Al! How did the tournament go? Did you win?"_ I asked, adding a small smiley face at the end. I hand him the board and he looks at me surprised.

"When did you start writing again?" Alfred asks, ignoring my original questions. I sigh and take the board back, wondering if I should tell him the truth.

_"Gilbert said it would help our relationship."_

Alfred frowns and I swear I see a vein pop. "I thought I said the same thing and you wouldn't do it," he says in a low and some-what hurt voice. Yes, it's true he did say something like that before, but he also would tell me he didn't have time to read what I had to say. I gave it up after I figured he didn't really care too much. I think about writing that for a moment, but decide against it. Instead I just write, _"Sorry..."_

"And your 'relationship?'" Alfred questions, "Dude, please tell me you're not... Dating him?" I hesitate, but nod, knowing that lying would only turn out badly in the end. "Mattie... You're... Gay?" He gives me a look somewhere between hurt and confused. I think I see a little bit of angry in the look, but I hope that's just me.

Instead of nodding, I pick up the whiteboard. _"Please don't be mad..."_ I write, handing him the board. He reads the note and his expression changes.

"Dude, I'm not mad at you," he says kindly, walking over to me and pulling me into a hug. I blush a bit, not quite expecting the sudden touch. It's weird to admit, but Alfred and I don't hug that often. After... Things happened, we stopped being a very touchy family.

Pulling away, he looks at me. "I don't care if you like boys or girls or both," he tells me, smiling honestly. Then he frowns. "But I don't like Gilbert. He's bad news and I don't wanna see my brother get hurt, alright?" He looks at me expectantly, but I pull away and shake my head, picking up my whiteboard. It takes me a little while to write what I have to say.

_Alfred, I love him... He... Came when I would have been all alone and he's helped me. And he took me to a really fun carnival and won me a stuffed bear..._ I pause, knowing I need to tell him, but not wanting to. _And... When his friends came along and tried to get him to leave me, he stood up to them... I got sick when they splashed me with water-but it's alright! Gilbert took me home and took care of me. Then there was Thanksgiving and that was a lot of fun. Ludwig and Feliciano came... They're really nice! Oh, and when I had a nightmare, he helped me through the night. He's annoying and rude, but caring and sweet when you get to know him! _

I'm about to hand him the whiteboard, but I jot something else down. _"And I love him..." _I add again. Satisfied, I give the board to Alfred. It takes him a moment to read it over, but when he does, he simply looks at me.

To my displeasure, he sighs and puts the whiteboard down. He gives me a look. "You don't love him, Mattie," he says, his brows furrowing. "It's just a phase, alright? So stay away from." I look right back at him, feeling anger building up. How can he say I don't love him? What makes him so sure?

Mustering all the courage in the world, I shake my head and glare. I snatch up the whiteboard and write quickly, _"You're wrong, Alfred. I love him and he is my boyfriend. There's nothing you can do about it..."_ Taking a breath, I spin myself around and walk out of the room, taking the stuffed bear with me. I don't look back, but I'm sure that Alfred is looking at my back shocked, hurt, and angry.

I close the door to our bedroom and lay on the bed, facing the wall. A few tears escape, clouding my vision and landing on my glasses. I start to sob, trying to be as quiet as possible, clutching the bear close. How can Alfred say I don't love him? How can he say that he doesn't care who I like and yet tell me that I couldn't see him?

I almost don't hear the door open and close, even with its tell-tale creak. I don't move, though, and keep myself fixated on the ugly wall. The bed bends down and I feel him stroking my hair. I snuggle away from him and he sighs.

"Mattie, I'm sorry," he says, "I guess I'm tired or something, you know? I'm not going to keep you from seeing Gilbert. I'm just saying he's bad news. But... I can't keep you from doing what you want. Dude, I just want you to be happy."

I smile softly and scoot back, turning to look at him. He grabs my glasses and cleans them off before placing them back on my face. "I love you, Mattie," he smiles, "I love you and everything you are. Just be happy, alright." I smile and nod, sitting up as Alfred pulls me into a hug.

We stay that way for a few moments, but the hug quickly ends when the phone rings. Alfred jumps up and rushes to grab it. I stand up and follow him, a little curious.

"... Yup! Of course! Kay! See ya there!" Alfred puts the phone down and turns to face me, a large smile dancing on his face. "I'm going over to Kiku's house for the rest of the day! Be back by dinner!" With that, he grabs his wallet out of the suitcase still in the doorway and rushes out.

Sighing, I pick up the suitcase and drag it to his room. I place it on his bed and return to the living room, sitting down heavily on the couch. I find myself missing Gilbert more than Alfred, though I haven't seen Alfred in a week. Laying back, I wonder where our relationship went. When we were little, Al and I were the best of friends. Now, we're so distant. He only hugs me when I feel bad; never just because he's my brother. Worse, if his friends invite him somewhere, he's out faster than anything even if I need him.

Maybe that's just his way of dealing with grief; running off and leaving me behind. I mean, I do look a lot like her, but we're twins! He looks like her a lot too.

So, I lay there, wondering if I'll ever get my brother back. The one who always played with me. Now, he has other friends who are more important. Or the brother who would kiss my bruises when I fell. Now, he only seems to care when something really bad happens or he accidentally hurts me. I practically have to kill myself to get any affection out of him sometimes.

But mostly, I want the brother who loves me, because I'm starting to think he doesn't love me so much anymore.

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_Phew! This took a little bit to get out. Sorry about that! I think I know where I'm taking this now~ _

_I really hope I get more time to write so my writing doesn't suck like this chapter does ORZ xD _

_So, Please review~ I hit 100 reviews thanks to you guys! Let's keep going~ Love you and thank you all!  
_


	14. Awesome Football Games

_FINALLY able to update~ Enjoy~

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The rest of the weekend went by quickly with Alfred spending much of his time partying with his friends. He pretty much ignored me and really only acknowledged my existence when I was cooking breakfast for him. I couldn't help but miss Gilbert, but there was no way for me to reach him. Alone in the apartment, I found myself wishing that I was sitting with Gilbert on the couch or that I was eating dinner with Gilbert instead of the empty chair across from me. I guess you can say that I have gotten a little obsessed with my boyfriend, but can you really blame me? It has been a while since I have felt this kind of love.

Now Sunday, Alfred has a football game at the school against a neighboring town. Alfred comes out of the bathroom and looks over at me as I clean up what is left from our breakfast. "Hey dude?" he calls, "Wanna go to the game tonight?" I spin around to face him with a small smile on my face. I nod and he smiles. "Awesome! Now get ready. And it's cold outside so bundle up! I have to go now for a morning practice, but be at the field at seven for the game." He smiles and picks up his football bag before walking out the door.

I know it's silly, but I can't help but wonder if Gilbert will be there. I really want him to be. I know that he and his brother don't have the best relationship, but I'm hoping that Feliciano will be there at least. If he's there, he might be able to call Gilbert and get him to come.

Feeling particularly excited for once, I do a few minor chores around the house such as washing the clothes and dishes. The chores keep me busy and make the day go by faster.

I am just getting out of the shower when there is a knock at the door. A little confused, I pull on my clothes and run to the door. Instantly, I am swept off my feet and given the biggest bear hug ever. I don't even have to look up; I know it's Gilbert.

"How is my awesome boyfriend?" he asks me smiling from ear to ear. I pull away smiling and, although I can tell my face is bright red, place a small kiss on his lips. He kisses me back and walks further into my house, but doesn't jump on the couch like I half expect him to.

"Going to the game tonight?" he asks me. I smile and nod. "Awesome! We're totally going together. Come on and get ready. It's six thirty. And it's cold so I brought my awesome car." He smirks and _then_ jumps on my couch. Laughing, I head into my bedroom and pull on a red sweatshirt over my t-shirt.

I come out and Gilbert it flipping through the channels to pass the time. I smile at him and grab the whiteboard off the coffee table. I gesture to let him know that I'm ready to go and he gets off the couch. He throws an arm around me and walks me out of my apartment. I blush, but I focus on writing something on my whiteboard. When we are halfway down the apartment stairs, I hand him the board.

_"I love you," _I wrote, _"And I missed you so much!" _Gilbert reads this and smiles, pulling me closer as we walk out into the cold November air. He only lets go when he opens the door for me and I slide in. When he gets inside himself, he grabs my hand in his. Holding the wheel with one hand, he drives us to the school.

When we park, I turn to unlock my seat belt. Gilbert jumps out quickly and comes to my side to open the door for me. Blushing, I take his hand as he guides me out of the car and don't let go. We make our way to the ticket booth and Gilbert insists on buying my ticket. I don't put up an argument and soon we are inside the small stadium.

It's a pretty nice football field. The PTA had it built a few years ago when they deemed the other one unsafe. Most people were well aware that the old field was just fine and the school just wanted a reason to build another one with the state's money, but the stadium turned out so well no one complained.

As we round the corner towards the bleachers, Gilbert begins to pull me faster. Soon, we break into a jog. I don't know why we're running until I spot a certain brown haired Italian leaning over the rail, waving at the football players.

"Hey! Feli!" Gilbert shouts as we catch up. Feliciano turns around with a bright smile on his face. He looks right at me and jumps, pulling me into a hug.

"Ah! Mattie!" Feliciano greets excitedly, "I missed you! How have you been? Ve! I hope you've been well." Smiling, I nod and hug him back, still not letting go of Gilbert's hand. "Come on! My brother and I have some seats saved real close to the field!" Feliciano grabs my other hand and I find myself being dragged through the crowds of people. Gilbert doesn't let go and follows.

We follow Feliciano to a bench in the front of the area. Another Italian who looks very similar to him looks up and glares at us. I look down, avoiding his gaze.

"Who the fuck is that?" the boy asks in an aggravated tone. I can feel him staring at me.

"Lovi! Don't be mean!" Feliciano whines, "This is Mattie! He's Gilbert's boyfriend!" Feliciano looks at me and smiles softly. "Ve. I'm sorry, Mattie. Lovi tends to be a bit angry. He's just unhappy that his boyfriend isn't here!"

'Lovi's' eye twitches and he glares at Feliciano. "Bastard! He's not my boyfriend! He's a fucking creep!" he shouts loud enough for a teacher to turn around and glare at us. "And don't call me Lovi, dammit! My name is Loviano!"

Gilbert rolls his eyes and sits down, pulling me onto his lap. I gasp in surprise at the quick movement but smile up at him. "Whatever Lovi," Gilbert says, "You know you're deeply in love with Antonio. It's not awesome to deny it." I freeze. Did he just say 'Antonio?'

Gilbert must have felt me tense because he pulls me closer and rubs my arms. "It's alright, Birdie," he tells me, "Antonio hardly ever comes to these games." He looks up at Feliciano, I assume for assurance.

"Ah, So he's bullied you?" Feliciano asks kindly, sitting down on the bench next to us. "I'm sorry. He's had a rough life, so he tends to pick on people." I try to settle a bit and smile. I can tell that the smile is tight and looks forced, but Feliciano smiles with me. Loviano gets up and leaves, declaring that he is fed up with his stupid brother and his stupid friends.

The game soon begins and our school takes an early lead. Alfred is the quarterback and is making some pretty amazing plays. I haven't gone to a game of his for a little while, so I am a little surprised at how much better he has gotten. He throws the ball expertly to the other players, one of which is Ludwig. Ludwig takes the ball and runs down the field, dodging the opposing players. I see Feliciano tense and stare at the field in a trance. He runs down, nearing the end-zone. I look over and see Feliciano grip the end of the bleacher.

It all happens so fast, I don't even know what to do. Ludwig reaches the end-zone and I find myself being forced up by Gilbert and the rest of the cheering crowd. I smile and clap, and Feliciano goes crazy, jumping up and down and shouting. But soon there is a crash and a silence. Feliciano gasps and stops, bursting into tears. I cover my mouth with my hand and Gilbert grips me tightly.

Just as Ludwig touched the end-zone (scoring the point), a huge member from the opposing team rammed into him, sending him through the air. It was enough to launch him high into the air and when he came down, his head hit the field with a sickening crack and his helmet came off. He didn't move and the crowed went silent.

"L-Ludwig!" Feliciano cries, snapping me out of the replay. He begins to run down to the field where the paramedics are. Gilbert grabs me and we follow him. I know that Gilbert and Ludwig have a rather strained relationship, but the determination and worry in his eyes tell me that he is very concerned.

The people lining the rail try to stop us, but we are able to get over the low wire without anyone pulling us back. Feliciano is a few feet ahead of us, not very skilled at running. Gilbert breaks into a sprint and I feel like my lungs are going to explode. He runs up, grabs Feliciano's hand and runs even faster.

Finally we get to where Ludwig is. A small circle is surrounding him, mostly made up of his teammates and coaches. Three paramedics are kneeling on the ground, trying to get him to wake up. Before anyone can stop him, Feliciano lets go of Gilbert and breaks into the circle, collapsing next to Ludwig.

"Luddy! Luddy!" Feliciano cries, "Luddy please wake up! It's Feli, ve! It's me! Please wake up!" Gilbert and I approach next. Gilbert kneels down next to his brother and gently touches his hand. I sit down next to him.

"Hey, Ludwig. Wake up for your awesome brother, okay?" Gilbert says in one of the softest voices I have ever heard from him. "Feli's here and he misses you. Wake up."

"Ludwig, please! Please Luddy!" Feliciano's tears stream down his cheeks, some dripping onto Ludwig's body.

No one moves and there is an eerie silence. Finally, there is a groan and Ludwig carefully opens his eyes. Feliciano moves to hug him, but stops himself. Gilbert smiles softly and I beam.

"F-Feliciano?" Ludwig asks, moving his hand to touch Feliciano's cheek. Feliciano nods, still crying and clutches his hand. "Don't cry, Feliciano," Ludwig tells him, letting out a shaky sigh, "I hate it when you cry." He smiles softly. "And I'm alright. Banged up, but I'll be fine. Don't worry about me." The last sentence came out like an order and not very softly. Still, you could tell he meant it in the kindest way possible.

"Dammit, _bruder,_" Gilbert sighs, "Of course he's worried about you. Fuck, I'm pretty damn worried myself. Now shut up and let people help you."

Ludwig glares and doesn't smile as he turns his gaze from Feliciano to his brother. "I'm going to be just fine," he scoffs, "Just hope that I can still do your chores around the house."

"I don't give a shit if you can do my chores!" Gilbert yells, turning to one of the medical personnel. "Get him in the goddamn van now and take him to the damn hospital." The man nods, obviously a little frightened from Gilbert's outburst. They help Ludwig up and onto the stretcher, Feliciano following.

"Where do you think you're going?" a man asks, placing a hand on Feliciano's shoulder. The small Italian yelps and jumps, turning around to face a mean looking medical man.

"S-Sorry! Ve! I was just going to the hospital with Luddy!" Feliciano cries.

"Friends and family only," comes the short reply.

"Let him go," Gilbert growls standing up and turning to the man. "That's his boyfriend. I'm his brother. I took a car and need to get it outta here cause I don't have the money to get it towed." The man glares, but let Feliciano go and the Italian runs off to be by Ludwig's side.

As the circle disperses, a roar of applause erupts from the crowd. Everyone-even those from the opposing team-is on their feet, pleased to see that Ludwig is going to be alright. Smiling, I turn to him and hug him tightly. He looks at me and smiles softly. "He'll be alright," Gilbert says, but I can tell it's more for himself. "He's got me as an awesome brother. And as my brother, he's a little awesome as well. And awesome people are always okay." I chuckle a little at his 'logic' and look around.

I spot Alfred, looking at me from the other end of the field. I smile and wave to him, but he doesn't wave back. Instead, he glances at Gilbert, then at me and glares. Shrinking back, I clutch Gilbert and walk a little quicker. I know that Alfred is mad at me, but I don't want to think about it now.

We exit the field and the game starts to resume. Gilbert doesn't go back to the bleachers. Instead we make our way out of the stadium. I hear the buzzer go off indicating the end of the half. We climb into Gilbert's car and I pull out my whiteboard and quickly scribble down something before Gilbert starts the car. I don't want him reading and driving at the same time.

_"I know he'll be alright. Feliciano's there and we'll be there soon... I'm here for you."_

Gilbert smiles and hands me the whiteboard. "Thanks, Birdie," he grins, "Yeah, he'll be alright. Do you have any idea how awesome you are?" I blush and shake my head. "Very. Like the most awesome, amazing boyfriend anyone could ever ask for."

I smile, blushing deeper and look out the window. Me? Awesome? I don't think I really am. But when I'm with Gilbert, anything-even the impossible-is very possible.

* * *

_This was actually going to be a little different, but I liked where this is going. So, here we are._

_Sorry for the updates being so slow. Now with a snowday plus a weekend, I'm more able to update. _

_Please review if you get the chance! It really means a lot to me and I love hearing your thoughts and opinions. You always bring a smile to my face when I read those lovely reviews even when I'm having the crappiest of days!  
_


	15. Being There for Awesome

_Finally, another chapter. I guess you can just count on weekly updates, huh?_

_Gil here is a little OOC, but I justify it by saying that he's just tired._

_And I'm SO sorry for the late update. Fan fiction was being a jerk ._

_

* * *

_

The hospital is a little creepy at night, in my opinion. The nurses and doctors seem very tired and have large bags under their eyes. Gilbert doesn't look much better off. After two hours, he is tired and upset, though he doesn't want to show it. The only weakness he dares sot show is by leaning his head on my shoulder.

Feliciano is here as well, sitting next to Gilbert and clutching his arm as the silent tears continue to flow. I feel so bad for him and I feel a little guilty as well. Maybe I shouldn't be here. Ludwig isn't my brother and I don't even know him very well. I did shed a few tears, but quickly wiped them away. I really have no right to cry for him.

Then, I look down and see Gilbert on my shoulder. He is unnaturally quiet with his ruby red eyes staring at nothing. I realize that I am here because Gilbert needs me. He was there for me when I needed him. Now it's my turn to be the supporter.

The automatic doors slide open, making me jump a little and look up. A bunch of football players, sweaty after the long game, storm into the waiting room. Three coaches are leading them and one immediately goes up to the desk. They're from my school; I can tell because of the uniform. Looking a little longer, I spot Alfred. Before I can look away, though, he has already made eye contact and is walking over.

"Ready to go home?" he asks without even looking at Gilbert. I feel the albino stiffen as he plays with my long sleeve sweatshirt. It's almost as though he is telling me to say no and stay with him. Honestly, I was going to anyway.

I shake my head and Alfred frowns, shooting me a glare. "Well, we need to go," he says flatly, "We have school tomorrow and you have to go." Yes, Alfred is right, but my mind flickers to all of the times he's stayed home and I had to cover for him. Alfred is honestly the last person I wanted going to school advice from, but I am too timid to actually tell him that.

I look down and see Gilbert who is staring at me intently. Pleading with my eyes, I silently beg him to help me. He nods in understanding and lifts his head up, blinking away the sudden dizziness I'm sure he is feeling after laying on my arm for so long. Feliciano sits up with him, but does not remove his face from where it is buried in Gilbert's shoulder.

"Birdie is gonna stay here with me tonight," Gilbert mumbled tiredly, "He said he wanted to stay with me. Besides, Luddy is his friend, so he wants to be there for him."

Alfred's glare intensifies and he opens his mouth to argue when the coach comes over. He lays a soft, but firm, hand on his shoulder as if to tell him to be quiet.

"I can get Matthew here out of his morning classes if need be," he says giving me a kind smile, "Feliciano told me much about you, kid. Says you're a nice person. So, don't worry 'bout tomorrow, alright?"

I smile and nod. It's actually pretty interesting; the head coach of the football team is also the art teacher. Feliciano is really artistic and often spends time after school in the art room. I never knew that Feliciano talked about me, though. I'm really not the most interesting person in the world.

Alfred knows better than to argue with his coach, so he simply nods and puts on a fake smile until he walks away. When he does, Alfred turns to me with a disappointed look. I know he isn't happy with me, but I really want to be here for Feliciano, Gilbert, and Ludwig. Besides, Gilbert is... Well, he's my boyfriend. And Alfred can't do anything about that.

"I'm gonna get going then, kay?" Alfred asks in an abnormally quiet voice. He doesn't seem mad, just defeated. Alfred never likes to loose. No one does, but he takes winning very seriously. I hope he doesn't think he's lost me. Really, he hasn't! He is still my brother and I love him, but there are others who need me. Imagine! Someone actually needs me. Usually, I'm the one who needs someone.

Biting back a gulp, I nod and offer a soft smile. Alfred smiles back, but it isn't honest. It's tight and makes me want to cry. When Alfred smiles honestly, the whole room lights up. The room still seems dark and solemn to me.

Alfred leaves along with many of the other football players. It's late, almost midnight. Gilbert turns and looks at me. His usually bright red eyes are dull now. It makes him seem so different.

"Thanks Birdie," He mumbles. He opens his mouth to say more, but we hear a choked snore from the other side of him. I smile softly as I see Feliciano asleep peacefully. He looks much more relaxed, though you can tell that even in his unconsciousness, he is worried. Gilbert chuckles and gently ruffles the Italian's hair.

"Thank you," he says again, turning back to me, "It's really awesome that you came. You're, well, awesome." I simply smile, but I can't help but think that I'm really not that awesome. If I was really that awesome, I wouldn't have to pick; I could have both my boyfriend and my brother.

* * *

An hour later, a nurse comes out and tells us that we can go in and see Ludwig. She can't give us much information except that he isn't awake, but is stable. Gilbert gets mad, wanting more out of her, so I have to drag him away.

We wake Feliciano up and make our way down the long white hallway. I don't look into any of the rooms; I'm too afraid of what I might see. I hate hospitals, especially at night. They're scary, unpredictable. It was a hospital where we heard the news and I never wanted to go back since then. Still, I have to be strong for Gilbert.

We enter a small white room with two beds. The one closest to the door is empty, but the one by the window is filled by a sleeping blonde haired boy. Feliciano runs over to him while Gilbert and I make our way over slowly.

Ludwig has a bright red bandage wrapped around his head and another around his wrist. He isn't hooked up to any IV's, which I assume is good. Gilbert and I pull up two chairs while Feliciano sits down on the edge of the bed. Th Italian brushes his fingers softly through Ludwig's hair and looks over at us. He doesn't looked confused or hurt or even totally lost like he usually does. Instead, he is smiling softly, silently telling us that he knows Ludwig will be alright.

We both smile back at him and I rest my head on Gilbert's shoulder. I suddenly feel really, really tired. It's well past midnight and way past my usual bedtime of ten. Feliciano yawns and lays down on the edge of the bed, his back to us and facing Ludwig. Gilbert rests his chin on top of my head and sighs softly.

"He'll be alright, birdie," he whispers to me quietly. "Like I said; I'm awesome so he's awesome. But thanks... It means a lot that you came here with me. Stood up to your brother and stuff. That takes balls."

I nod ever so slightly as I allow sleep to take hold of me. My thoughts ebb away into nothingness and I allow myself to be encompassed in a peaceful darkness. I know everything is going to be alright. I know that simply because Gilbert is there.

* * *

_I'm just going to tell you here and now that this is one HUGE foreshadowing. I'm not going to tell you how or why or where. Just that it is. So, you'll just have to wait and see. ;3_

_Thank you for your continued support! Please, keep reviewing! They make me so happy and they make me feel all special inside owo THANK YOU~  
_


	16. The Awesome is Gone

_Sorry for the long wait! I hope you're not mad ;A;_

_Uhm... You're probably gonna kill me. ._._

* * *

I wake up just as the first light of morning streams through the window. The first thing I notice is that my neck hurts a little and I am laying on a very soft, very comforting shoulder. I yawn, opening my eyes and sit up. Gilbert smiles down at me before turning his attention back to the bed. Gazing over, I see Ludwig who is sitting up in the bed. He is looking down at Feliciano. The Italian is asleep on his shoulder. I can guess that he probably didn't get much sleep the night before.

As I sit up, the blonde turns his attention to me. He smiles just slightly and nods, though his expression is still stiff like it usually is. "Thank you for staying with _ßruder,_" he says in a quiet voice so as to not wake Feliciano. I smile a little and nod.

"You just gotta get better, Luddy," Gilbert sighs, "_Opa_ is... Probably worried." He looks a little unsure, as though he really doesn't know. I wonder if they grandfather even knows Ludwig is in the hospital.

"_ßruder, _don't lie," Ludwig says, looking away. He rests back and strokes Feliciano's hair. "_Go__ßvater_ probably doesn't care if he even knows. But I bet he doesn't know I'm here." He pauses and looks at Gilbert. "I'm not a child anymore, Gilbert. I know he isn't the _Go__ßvater_ you see in the L.L. Bean commercials."

I am expecting an "Oh no! He cares!" or a "He'll be here soon!" but it doesn't come. Instead, Gilbert just nods and settles back. I look up at him worriedly. He _is_ going to say his grandfather cares... Right?

Suddenly, Feliciano jerks awake and looks up and Ludwig, "You're awake!" he cries, a little too loudly. Ludwig winces and I can tell he probably had a headache before which was just made worse. He nods anyways and tries to smile for him.

"Yes, I am," he tells the Italian. "You really didn't need to worry, though. I'm fine." At this, Feliciano frowns and pouts. Gilbert glares and I look from the albino to his brother. He really isn't fine and I know that is what's going through their minds right now.

"'Fine' is not being taken away by a stretcher to a hospital while unconscious with a concussion!" Gilbert snaps. Ludwig narrows his eyes and opens his mouth, only to close it a moment later and decide not to speak. He knows Gilbert is right, though I know he won't admit it.

"Please get better soon!" Feliciano begs. He starts to tear up a little and Ludwig looks down at him. He sighs and kisses his head. He doesn't like to show affection, I can tell. But he's trying to be as kind as he can to his boyfriend. He brushes Feli's tears away.

"I will," Ludwig promises, running his fingers through Feliciano's hair. "So don't cry for _Gott's_ sake!" Feliciano smiles brightly and his eyes light up. Gilbert smiles and pulls me closer. He feels a little more relaxed.

"We should probably get going," Gilbert says, standing up. "We need to get to school sometime today or else the principal with kick our asses." Feliciano laughs happily and I chuckle a bit. "I'm sure _Opa_ will be here sometime today," Gilbert tries, turning to Ludwig and smiling wryly. Ludwig scoffs, but says nothing as he sits back and looks up at the television. I frown sympathetically. We all know their grandfather is not coming. I can't help but feel bad for them. If I was in the hospital, at least I know I don't have a father figure. They have one, but he doesn't care.

I stand with Gilbert and Feliciano reluctantly gets out of the bed. He kisses Ludwig on the lips softly in an intimate 'goodbye.' Ludwig presses back softly and smiles one of the rare smiles he only expresses when Feli is around him. Feliciano waves goodbye and we leave the room.

We make our way out of the hospital and to Gilbert's car which has been sitting out in the parking lot all night. Feliciano gets in the back and I take my usual spot in the passenger's seat next to Gilbert who gets in and starts the car.

As the city passes us by, I glace over at Gilbert's still frame. His eyes are focused on the road in front of us. Usually, his hand is on my lap with the other skillfully holding the wheel. Now, though, his hands are firmly gripping the wheel, his knuckles white. The car is silent; not even the radio is on so we can't listen to his obnoxious rock music. It's like our own silent world—the one I'm so used to being in. But now, it doesn't feel normal. It feels awkward and out of place.

We pull up to the school and Gilbert parks in his usual spot near the language section of the school. Feliciano hurries out and thanks Gil for the ride before running off to find his friends. Gilbert sighs and gets out of the car. He comes up behind me and puts his arm around my shoulders. I move closer to him and look up. He looks down at me and offers a small, tight smile, but I can tell it's less than half-hearted.

I wish there was something I could say, but there is no way I can form the words in my mouth. I open my mouth to speak but, as usual, I give up and shut it. He simply smiles softly again and kisses my forehead.

"It's okay, Birdie," he assures me, "Remember; I'm awesome!" His mouth forms a winning smile, but his eyes aren't in it. His usually bright red eyes are dull and it makes me uncomfortable. Still, I nod as we enter the school.

* * *

The day passes by rather quickly. We came in at the beginning of fourth period, so it was nice to miss our first few classes. I'm sure Gilbert was zoned out most of the day and I was focused on hoping he was alright.

Now that it is lunch time, I make my way across the campus to where Gilbert and I always eat. Seniors are allowed to eat outside and since it has been nice lately, that is exactly what we have been doing. It's usually just me and him, but sometimes Feliciano and Ludwig would join us. Because of the past events, I'm sure it will just be me and him. I'm pleased about that. Maybe I can try to comfort him as I seem to be doing a pretty crappy job of doing that.

I round the corner and step outside into the nice, warm air. Suddenly, I hear voices. They sound familiar so I pause. I hear Gilbert's signature laugh and am about to turn the corner and greet him when I hear another laugh. I know that laugh. I freeze. It's Antonio.

"So, we hear you've been hanging around that retarded kid," Antonio says, "Williams? He's an idiot!"

"_Mon cher_," another voice, I presume Francis's, says gracefully, "He's dragging you down which is dragging us down. Our popularity is at stake."

"Guys, he's not retarded. Just quiet," Gilbert defends. "You know, he's pretty awesome once you get to know him. And I just saw those cheerleaders hitting on you. I think our popularity is fine."

"_Hermano_," Antonio sighs, "They were hitting on us and not you. We're the 'Bad Touch _Trio_.' And we get the girls together. That is, unless you're gay." I can tell he's looking at Gilbert with his eyebrows raised, as though he just won.

"Oh, like you don't have the hots for Lovino?" Gilbert throws back. I notice he completely ignored the comment.

"I-I do not!" Antonio retorts, frustrated. "And that doesn't make me think you're straight. You're gay, aren't you?"

"It's okay, _mon cher_," Francis tries, "Everyone is different. But we have a slight problem if you're dating Williams. We're at the top; he's at the bottom. We'll never recover!"

"Stop being a fucking drama queen!" Gilbert shouts. I expect him to either avoid the comment again or just admit it. I really wouldn't mind if he did announce that we are going out. Instead, though, he takes my hopes away and leaves me feeling empty. "I'm not dating him! I barely know him! He's just a charity case to help me get into college. If I help him speak again, I'll get major brownie points!"

My heart freezes. H-How could he? I'm just a charity case to him? So, everything we did... Everything we had was just fake? For college? The tears well up in my eyes and I gasp, taking in a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"What was that?" Antonio asks. The three of them come around the corner and see me. Gilbert looks shocked and reaches out for me, but I'm too busy running away. The last thing I see of them is Francis and Antonio's pleased faces.

"Mattie! Birdie! Wait! Let me explain, please!" Gilbert calls after me, but I barely hear him. I don't know where I'm going and don't bother to look up and brush the tears away. I don't care. I just want to run. I don't look up before it's too late.

I find myself face to face with a speeding car. Looking around, I see that I am in the middle of one of the busy streets around the school. I hear Gilbert scream before the car slams into me at full force. I feel myself fly through the air and everything goes in slow motion. I loose all sense of where I am, but I'm still conscious. _How could he?_ I think.

I feel no pain, but I know I'm going to die. I just hope it is painless.

The last thing I think is that I don't even remember my last words.

* * *

_I'm sorry, Mattie D: And I'm sorry for making Gil an ass. All will be explained._

_But guess what! I finished! I just need to type it up! :D _

_Review please :3  
_


	17. Awesome Comatose Part 1

_Oh honhon. I am an evil little child. See, this chapter had two parts. _

_But I split them up._

* * *

_Awesome Comatose Part 1  
_

For a few moments, all I see is black. I am just a spirit floating in space. I can feel the weight of my body, but I have no clue where my hands, nose, eyes, feet, or any parts are. Everything is blank including my mind. I can only register what I feel, but the thoughts escape me.

I have no idea where I am. Dead, right? I have to be. There's no way I was hit by a car and survived. So, is this really it? My eternity; the way I will spend the rest of my afterlife? Just floating here, not being able to see or move?

Suddenly, a white light floods my vision. I blink—at least, I think I blinked—and I find myself sitting in a familiar room. I look around and realize that I've been here before. This is my old living room in my old apartment.

From when my mother was still alive.

Looking down, I notice that I'm much shorter and am wearing a familiar green and white shirt with blue jeans. I touch my face and my glasses aren't there, but I can see just fine. I must be back to when I was little.

Before I can really understand what is happening, I hear shouting from another room. I look up towards the noise and focus my eyes on the bedroom. Suddenly, an overwhelming sense of deja vu hits me and I find myself standing. I didn't tell my body to, it just did as though it is on autopilot. It's like I've been through this before and my body knows exactly what to do.

As I near the room, the shouts become louder and more frantic, but I can tell it's not because I'm coming closer. The volume is rising. The need to get out of there is increasing.

"Momma?" I find myself asking. I grasp my throat, finally able to make a move of my own. I talked! Only, why did I say 'Momma?' And my voice is far to high for me to be seventeen. No, I sound ten.

"Matthew? It's okay, sweetie. Just go—NO! Dammit, Mikey, go away!" A voice—my mother! I want to cry, but the dead body I am in doesn't let me. I haven't heard her voice for so long, though. Seven years. Seven long, hard years of silence. Why haven't I spoken...?

"Don't tell me what to do!" A male voice shouts from behind the door. "You have no control over me!"

"Alright, just please! Leave me—Oh my God! Mikey! What are you going to do with—Please! No!" My mother yells from behind the door. There is an evil laugh followed by an ear piercing scream that quickly dies. I run forward and open the door.

I gasp and I feel bile rising in my throat. No! Not again! My mother is lying on the bed, blood pooling around her. Her beautiful violet eyes are lifeless and dead, but open in the most horrific way. The red blood mixes with her golden hair, creating a disgusting and terrifying color I never wanted to see again. Her once beautiful white skin is now yellowed and sickly from the blood loss.

A familiar scream rises in my throat. "You-You killed her! You killed my mother!" I scream and, though I want them, the tears simply do not come. She's gone. Dead. _Again._

"Shut up! Shut the fuck up!" Mikey shouts, holding the blade to me. "If you say one more fucking thing I will kill you! Just like your precious mother! One more thing! One more fucking thing ever!"

And I was silent.

* * *

_The next part SHOULD be released tomorrow. HOPEFULLY, but no promises. Then I'm off for break and on vacation so I won't be back until Thursday. We'll see how much computer time I can get. _

_You guys should either love me for posting the new part, or hate me for posting it in parts. _

_Review please~  
_


	18. Awesome Comatose Part 2

_FINALLY ABLE TO UPDATE AGAIN. Sorry for it being a little late, but you're lucky I was able to update at before Thursday. I'm still on my little trip, but I had a free morning and I love you guys so much xD_

_So, enjoy!_

* * *

There is another white flash and I am floating again. Where I could once feel the voice somewhere in my throat, it is now gone; hidden away. I look down at myself and see that my legs are longer as is my hair when I bring my hands up to touch my head. I am my older self again. That brings me both relief and sadness. I am relieved that i don't have to relive my younger life, but sad that I can't at the same time.

Mom, Alfred, and I would always take little day trips to museums, the beach, amusement parks, all sorts of different fun places. I was always a little shyer, but Alfred would "help" me a little. He was always the one who would drag me onto the most insane rides and the cliffs by the beach. Mom was always the one would would carry me when the rides were just too insane or help me down the cliffs when I went too far up.

I had everything I needed. No, my Dad was never in my life. He left when Alfred and I were three. He and Mom never married; they had been young lovers. He and Mom met during college and fell in love. But when Mom found out she was pregnant with us, he promise he would stay by her side.

And he did, but only until we were three. Then he realized he didn't want to be tied down with a family, so he left. Mom wasn't upset about it. She was sad that we would never really know our father since he didn't want anything to do with us. We never visited and he never came back to see us. Still, it didn't matter. We had each other. Mom had a job that could pay for our apartment and I had a brother who really did care for us.

Of course, Mom started dating. I mean, she always said that we were awesome and her "little men," but you can only last so long with just kids. She wanted someone who she could eventually marry.

That's when we met Mikey.

Mikey seemed alright. They had met at the restaurant Mom worked at. He was quiet, but seemingly kind to her. He even bought Alfred and I Christmas presents. After a year, though, things started to go downhill. He would come to our apartment drunk when he didn't even live with us. He would yell and scream and Mom. Thankfully, he never laid a finger on us, but he came close to it a few times. Thinking about it now, I guess it was only just a matter of time before he really snapped.

Looking up, I find myself floating somewhere in the atmosphere, the sun burning comfortingly down my back as I fly across the sky. I can't control where I'm going and yet I feel in control. The sky is bright and blue. I feel peaceful and happy.

"Matthew? Matthew, there you are?" I turn towards the comforting and familiar voice. My mother is walking over to me, her feet lightly touching the air. Her blonde hair is a little below shoulder length and is just the way I remember it. Her violet eyes sparkle and her smile is bright which causes her entire face to light up.

She comes up to me and brushes the hair from my face before touching my cheek softly, the way she used to when I was sad or had woken up from a nightmare. I lean into the touch, not wanting it to end because when it does, my mother will leave. Her smile turns soft and mournful. "I miss you." She pauses and looks at me. "Matthew, talk to me. Speak, please."

I open my mouth, but no sound escapes me. "Matthew, please talk. I miss your voice." She studies my expression. "Mikey is gone. He died of a heart attack a few years ago. It's time to move on, sweetie. He won't come and get you."

I swallow and nod before opening my mouth again. "M-Mom?" I whisper. I can't believe how different my voice is now. It's still high, but is much lower from when I was ten. Mom smiles and kisses my forehead.

"Please keep talking. You need to let people hear you," he tells me. I nod again before frowning.

"Am I dead?" I ask. Mom shakes her head.

"No, Matthew, you need to go back." She waves her arm and a fuzzy screen appears in a cloud. I see a hospital room and Alfred is sitting in a chair in the room. Arthur is next to him with a hand on his shoulder, but he doesn't seem to notice.

Suddenly, Gilbert bursts into the room. The two blondes look up at him. Arthur is expressionless, but Alfred glares dangerously. When he looks up, his eyes are red and puffy. It surprises me. I have never seen him this distraught before.

Alfred stands up and balls his fists. Arthur tries to calm him down and get him to sit, but he won't. I can't hear what is going on, but I can tell the argument is heated. Alfred points to the door, but Gilbert crosses his arms and plants his feet. They shout and yell more as hands fly into the air.

Then, Gilbert sits down on a bed and out of the shot. Alfred stomps his foot and pouts like does when he knows he has lost and Arthur is finally able to tug him back down into the seat. Suddenly, I feel my hair being touched and my hand shoots to my head. I turn around, but Mom is a few feet from me.

"You have a lovely boyfriend there," she says with a smile. "I certainly approve. Don't worry, though. I'm sure Alfred will accept him soon enough." She moves forward and pulls me into a hug. "It's time to say goodbye, Matthew. You're worrying them sick."

I nod, but clutch her tightly, not wanting to let her go. She kisses my head and I start to disolve. "Goodbye, Mom," I whisper before everything goes black again.

* * *

_One note: Keep in mind that Matthew is dreaming right now. It's a real dream, like an out of body experiance, but it's real. Still, all these things he is saying, he's not saying in "the real world." He hasn't said his first words yet, but it's coming._

_So review if you have the chanse. I'm sorry for any mistakes. I'm in a bit of a rush right now xD_


	19. Awesome Talking

_Second to last chapter! _

_Before we start, I want to point out a parallel and the foreshadowing. Ludwig was in the hospital. The hospital is the foreshadowing as well as the getting hit by a car in the first chapter._

Parallel_:** Ludwig's case**: __His boyfriend (Feli)_ , his brother (Gilbert), and his brother's boyfriend (Mattie),  
**Mattie's case**: His boyfriend (Gilbert), his brother (Alfred), and his brother's boyfriend(?) (Arthur)

_Enjoy~  
_

* * *

"This is all your fault!"

"How is it my fault? _You're_ his brother! Oh wait! You'd rather go out with your friends when you're the only family Birdie has!"

"Don't pull that on me! Aren't you supposed to be his boyfriend? Francis told me everything. He said that you denied even knowing him! You called him a charity case!"

"Don't listen to what that idiot says! And I didn't mean it!"

"So you did say it!"

"No! I mean, yeah, but no! I love him!"

"So? You just didn't want to look stupid in front of your friends. Look at where that put Mattie!"

"Oh, like you've never ditched him to go out or something?"

"I never caused _this_!"

"Would you two kindly shut the bloody hell up? What if he wakes up and hears you fighting? The boy doesn't need that right now!"

"Whatever! I just want that stupid bastard out of here!"

"How about you leave?"

"You're going to get us all kicked out if you two don't be quiet!"

My eyes slowly start to open and I realize that I am laying on a bed. I hear a steady beeping sound and feel a piercing headache start to form as I regain my senses. Colors swirl around me as I try to focus. Not only are my glasses off, but my eyes won't even stay on one spot. It makes me feel a little nauseous, but I don't think I'll throw up.

No one sees me waking up as they are too busy arguing. My brother's voice is loud and frantic, gradually growing in volume. I recognize Gilbert's voice as well. The familiar German accent fills my ears as he argues back. Another accented voice is shouting at the both of them, trying to get them to stop fighting or at least quiet down.

I want them to stop. I don't want them fighting anymore! I want them to like each other; to be friends! Honestly, I'm a little sick of them constantly fighting. They need to stop and at least agree to disagree.

Wait. A thought hits me out of nowhere. Gilbert. Why is he here? The memory comes rushing back and I remember him saying that he doesn't like me. He completely denied knowing me personally. I'm just a charity case. Still, the arguing is making my headache worse.

I open my mouth as though I have been doing this for forever. Really, I have been. It's just that usually, the words don't come out. Now they can. And I know they will. I purse my lips together to form the first letter. "P-Please... Stop... F-Fighting."

Alfred pauses for a minute and glares at me. "Not now, Mattie," he turns back to Gilbert. "I thought I told you to get your albino ass outta here and leave us al-" He stops short and looks back at me. His eyes are wide and his mouth is open. All eyes are on me. Al looks at me as though I have two heads. Arthur's eyes are wide, but his mouth is not open. Gilbert is smiling happily.

"Birdie! You talked!" he exclaims, "You did it! That's awesome! Say more things!"

"Please leave," I whisper out. Expressions change in an instant. Alfred looks smug and Gilbert's mouth hangs open. Arthur looks down and away.

"B-Birdie. I-I know what I said and-"

"Please?" I ask with a sigh. "I'm just a charity case. Nothing special. You should go find Antonio and Francis so you can get your popularity back. I'm not worth it." I don't say this bitterly because I'm not bitter at all. I understand that he doesn't want to be around me. I'm really just a nothing; someone who drags him down.

"You're not nothing!" Gilbert shouts angrily and slams his fist down on the end table. "You're special and awesome and I love you more than anything! What I did was really fucking stupid and I was an idiot! I don't even care if you don't love me or even love me anymore, but you have to know that you're _not_ nothing!"

I look at him with wide eyes. He's panting and his face is red. He's angry, but I know he's not mad at me. He looks at me earnestly and I can tell that his red eyes are serious.

"Wonderful. Now leave," Alfred glares. I turn and look up at him. I pause, not knowing what to do. No, now I must stand up to my brother. He has never bullied me, but he keeps making these decisions for me and it's time that I make my own choices.

"No. G-Gilbert don't leave," I say. "Al, please... I-I wanna talk to him." Well, that's kind of standing up for myself. Alfred gives me a look and I can tell he's about to say 'no'. "Please?" I try again. "It _is_ my... Hospital room."

That is something he really can't argue with (well, he probably can, but he doesn't), so he steps back and sits down with a huff. Gilbert looks at me with a mixed face. I can tell that he's happy I let him stay, but worried about what I will say.

"Birdie-"

"Do you love me?" I ask, looking up at him and frowning. He seems taken aback by the question.

"O-Of course I do! Mattie, how can you-"

"Then why did you say what you did?" I can't bring myself to use the actual words. I already feel tears pricking my eyes.

Gilbert looks down and takes a long pause. "Honestly? Because I'm an idiot. I was trying to hang onto the little thread of 'popularity' I had. But you know what I realized? Popularity isn't as awesome as they say it is," He looks at me and smiles softly, "Honestly, you're the only one who I _know_ actually liked me. I was only popular 'cause I was an ass. People were afraid of what I'd do if they didn't accept me. Antonio and Francis can do what they want. I don't wanna be popular anymore especially since it means losing you. I'd rather have you and not be popular. Though, I guess you don't want me."

"He doesn't," I hear Alfred mumble and Arthur smacks his arm. I look back at Gilbert with no expression. Then, I smile softly.

"I do," I whisper, swallowing the tears. This makes Alfred look up with a crazed expression.

"Wait! What?" he shouts, trying to stand up against Arthur trying to pull him back down. "Look at what he did to you! You're in the hospital and it's all his fault!"

"But I wouldn't be talking..." They all look at me, but reluctantly nod. It's true. Had I not been able to talk to my Mom again, I probably wouldn't be talking. Hell, I might never have talked again. I'm probably not going to tell Alfred about talking to Mom. He'll just think I'm crazy. Plus, it will bring up memories he probably doesn't want. Still, they can't deny the connection between being knocked unconscious-by a car, if I remember correctly-and starting to talk again.

I catch Gilbert's eye again. "You owe me," I say with a smile. He smiles back and leans down, kissing me on the lips softly. I return the kiss before he breaks it.

"Anything you want," he says.

"A dinner date at a nice restaurant that doesn't smell like beer, urine, and rednecks?"

"You got it!"

We smile at each other and out of the corner of my eye, I see Alfred relax just a bit. I know it's going to be a while before he finally accepts Gilbert. He might never, but Mom was right. Gilbert is a great boyfriend.

"Birdie, I'm so sorry," Gilbert says softly after a minute. He reaches out and strokes my hair. I lean into the touch and smile back, matching his soft eyes. "What I said..."

"It's okay," I pick up after he trails off. "I forgive you." And really, I do. People make mistakes and I trust him. Besides, I've probably put him through hell with landing myself in the hospital. He deserves my forgiveness and I'm ready to give it to him. I can never stay mad for long anyway.

These are obviously the words he had been wanting, no, _needing_ to hear for a while because he breaks out into the biggest smile I've ever seen.

"Awesome!"

I laugh for a moment before pausing. Now, I can finally say something I've been dying to say for so long. I've been able to write it and show it, but never say it.

"Gil... I love you."

* * *

_I'd like to point out that his first words are "Please stop fighting." Yup, he's Canadian xD_

_I really hope this doesn't seem rushed... I do think he would forgive Gil quickly as long as Gilbert really, really showed he was sorry._

_Speaking of sorry, Canadians say that a lot xD_

_Well, review. One more chapter after this! SO EXCITED!_

_If you're good, I might make a small USUK omake chapter :3  
_


	20. Awesome USUK Omake

_Here's the omake chapter~ Next one is the last! This is USUK :3_

_Sorry if there are a million mistakes! _

* * *

"Would Alfred F. Jones please come to the office as quickly as possible?" a frantic voice on the loud speaker called. Alfred looked up curiously. The person on the intercom wasn't the secretary. No, it was the principal and he sounded scared. Instead of 'report,' he said 'come.' Instead of 'immediately,' he said 'as soon as possible.' The language was so informal, it didn't take a genius to figure out that something was wrong.

All eyes turned and stared at the blonde American. The teacher nodded at him when he met her gaze, so he stood and hurried down the hall, trying to get rid of the awful feeling that was torturing him.

Suddenly, a force slammed into him and he fell backwards. He landed on his prepared hands thanks to quick reflexes and scrambled up. Pausing, he looked at his assailant.

"Artie?" Alfred asked and offered his hand to help the green eyed Brit stand. "Dude! I'm so sorry! I didn't see you and I'm in a huge rush! I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Arthur's green eyes darted up at him and narrowed in a glare. "Wanker! You nearly killed me!" he shouted, over exaggerating the situation. "Could you please watch where you're going?" Arthur stood, slapping Alfred's outstretched hand away. He dusted himself off and maintained the glare. "I'm fine, anyway. I just-"

"Good! Sorry, Artie! Gotta run!" Alfred called as he started running for the office again.

"Alfred! Bullocks! What the bloody hell did you do now?" Arthur yelled after him. He sighed and followed the American, curious as to what his totally not-boyfriend had gotten himself into this time. He wouldn't admit it, but he really did care for the loud American. As student body president, he might be able to get him out of trouble so long as he didn't do anything too stupid.

Of course, Alfred—the captain of the football team—was much faster than Arthur, the captain of the Speech and Debate team. By the time he had gotten to the office, the principal was already in the middle of the room and was talking to Alfred. This was some-what odd. Usually, the principal dealt with the trouble makers in his office privately. That was Arthur's first clue that something was not quite right.

As the Brit neared, he saw that Alfred's usually chipper and tan face was pale and scared looking. The principal handed him a green slip. Green slips at the school were both treasured and feared. They meant that a student could go home early, no questions asked, no parents needed to be called. Unfortunately, while you got to miss you math test, it usually meant that there was something seriously wrong.

Arthur pushed through the office doors and made his way to his friend. "I'm sorry, sir, but what is going on, if you don't mind me asking," Arthur inquired in his sweet voice. This usually didn't come out often, especially around Alfred. Around teachers, though, he was much nicer.

Before he got an answer, Alfred's head snapped up. "Can he come with me? He's my best friend and I need him!" The principal nodded and sighed another green slip for Arthur. Alfred took it and then dragged his friend out of the office and towards the parking lot as though his body was working on automatic.

"Alfred!" Arthur shouted, wriggling in his grasp as they entered the student parking lot. "What the hell are you doing? Stop!" In a sudden burst of strength, Arthur was able to tug Alfred to a halt. Looking up, he saw that the American's face was stained with tears, making Arthur's heart drop.

"What happened?" Arthur asked in a soft, knowing voice.

"M-Mattie's in the hospital," Alfred chocked out. "H-He was hit by a car." Arthur's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open.

"Oh, Alfred," Arthur mumbled and rested a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, I'll drive you. "You shouldn't go running around New York in this state." Arthur paused and took a breath before taking Alfred's hand. His face flushed, but he dragged the American to his small car.

"Thank you," Alfred whispered when they were both in the car. Arthur looked over at him and smiled very softly. He hated seeing Alfred like this, but knew he had to be there for his friend. Arthur started the car and took Alfred's hand, giving it a tight squeeze before putting on his seat belt and driving.

* * *

The hospital was bland and white. Alfred hated hospitals and doctors ever since his mother died. He stuck close to Arthur, clutching his hand as they waited. The doctors said that Matthew was in surgery and wouldn't wake up for a long while after that. The didn't say "if he ever did wake up," but it was heavily implied.

"He'll be alright," Arthur said softly when Alfred started to shake. The American looked down at him in a bit of surprise. It had been a long while since either of them had spoken.

"Alfred, he's stronger than you give him credit for," Arthur continued. "He will be alright."

"I sure hope you're right," Alfred mumbled glancing away.

Arthur forced a small chuckle to lighten the mood. "I'm the student council president. I'm always right." He looked up at Alfred as he squeezed the boy's hand again. This time, Alfred squeezed back lightly and smiled slightly.

"Do you want me to get you something to eat?" Arthur asked, blushing slightly. "I-It's late, so you might want to eat."

Alfred shrugged. "I'm not really that hungry." That was odd as the young American was almost always hungry. Arthur's thick brows nit together in worry and confusion. He sighed and stood up, patting Alfred's shoulders.

"I'm going to the cafeteria to get some food," he said, "You have to eat something, Alfred. It's not healthy to not eat, especially for you." Alfred opened his mouth to protest, but when Arthur glared, he closed it and simply nodded. Arguing with Arthur was not a smart move. You probably wouldn't win. Arthur walked away, disappearing into the sterile white of the hospital.

Arthur could have been gone for a minute or an hour; Alfred wouldn't have been able to tell. Time stood still for him, his hear consumed by fear and worry for his brother. He felt vulnerable without Arthur there and was happy he had brought him along. He didn't know what he would do without the crazy Brit at his side.

Finally, Arthur came back carrying a grey bag. Alfred perked up when he noticed it had red edges and a large yellow 'M' in the middle. It was McDonald's, his favorite and also the one place Arthur hated more than anything. He also had two drinks in his arms, one Styrofoam to hold hot drinks.

"I figured this was the only thing you would eat," Arthur explained with a half hearted glare. "So, you better eat it because I nearly threw up from the smell in that blasted place." Alfred smiled a little more and chuckled, taking the bag and opening it.

"Thanks, Artie!" Alfred said. Seeing the American so please, Arthur smiled as well. He sat down next to him and sipped at his own drink. Alfred wasn't eating as fast as he normally did, but Arthur was just glad he was eating.

Soon, their small meal was over. Arthur had gotten a sandwich from the cafeteria and Alfred finished his burger. They collected their trash and threw it away before sitting back down in the chairs of the waiting room.

"Thanks Arthur," Alfred sighed, now full and almost content. "For everything. I really need you now."

Arthur was slightly taken aback by the comment. Alfred was always very self-sufficient; 'the hero,' as he would call himself. Smiling, Arthur rested his hand on top of Alfred's.

"I'm always here for you, Alfred. We are best friends for a reason."

"Hey," Alfred laughed, "That's the first time I've ever heard you say we're best friends! You always like to pretend we're not!" Arthur blushed and nudged Alfred, but didn't stop smiling. He did always act a little stuck up. Alfred loved sports, he loved books. Alfred was loud, he was rather quiet unless you really angered him. Still, they truly were best friends.

"Well, we are." There was a long moment of silence that was interrupted by Alfred's loud yawn. Looking at his watch, Arthur noticed that he was very late. He sent a text to his mother before turning back to his blonde American best friend. "You're tired. Get some rest." Alfred yawned again, making Arthur yawn as well.

"You're tired too!" Alfred noted with a joking smile. "Here, lay on my shoulder and I'll lay on your head. We can be, like pillows to each other!" It seemed like an innocent plan, not to mention rather comfortable, but Arthur hesitated. Alfred sighed and put his arms around Arthur, pulling him close and forcing his head onto his shoulder. Alfred rested his cheek on his hair, but he didn't remove his arms from around the Brit's waist.

Arthur sighed and closed his eyes. He would never admit it, but he felt safe and comfortable in Alfred's arms. Little did he know, Alfred felt the same way.

"Night, Artie," Alfred mumbled, his eyes slipping closed.

"It's Arthur... But good night, git." Alfred smiled and chuckled before they both drifted off to sleep.

Simultaneously, they both thought the same thing.

"I love you."

* * *

_Just saying, I have 280 reviews RIGHT NOW. Y'know how awesome 300 would be? Yeah, pretty awesome. So, please review if you have the chance!  
_


	21. Through the Awesome Silence

_Last Chapter ;A;_

* * *

The days went by quickly and soon turned into weeks which turned into months. I was released from the hospital after a week and a half. My hand, which had been sprained, was fully healed by that Christmas. Gilbert visited everyday as did Alfred. Thankfully, though, the two hot heads didn't fight much. Ludwig was also alright and was released a few days before me. His grandfather never came.

Slowly, Alfred started to become a little more accepting of Gilbert. I think there will always be that tension between the two of them, but I'm thankful that Alfred will at least stand to be in the same room as Gilbert. I was rather surprised when Alfred let me invite him over for Christmas. It wasn't even my idea, it was his. We had a small gathering at our apartment. Gilbert's grandfather never really celebrated holidays, so he came with Ludwig who brought Feliciano who brought his brother Lovino. Lovino brought his boyfriend which happened to be Antonio. I was nervous when he first showed up at the door, but I let him in. I could tell Alfred wanted to throw him out, but soon we got talking and it was almost as though we had all been friends forever.

Alfred had Arthur over for our party. I think you could say that they're dating, but I can never be sure. One minute, they seem like the perfect couple and the next they're in a fight. They're almost like a married couple, always fighting. Alfred sure has a lot to learn about Arthur's quick temper, but the look they get in their eyes when they're around each other is pure love. I would know; Gil and I have the same look.

Gilbert has his hand in mine as we walk through the halls of the school. I smile at him and he smiles back, just like usual. No one really makes fun of us anymore. Francis stopped when Antonio did. Their popularity just didn't seem very important anymore.

"So... I got accepted into The University of Miami," Gilbert tells me. "How awesome is that! It's gonna be warm all the time and there will be so many people!" I can feel my smile wavering. Oh, right. College. We're graduating in a month.

I guess I'm happy and excited to get out of high school. I mean, I've been in school nearly all my life. Now, I'll finally be free. But Gilbert is going away to college and I'm going to be stuck here.

"That's great, Gil," I say, my tongue thick with the lie. No, it's not great. I probably won't see him after this summer. How can we keep our relationship going when he's so far away? And there's no way I can afford to go to a school over there, not even a small community school. I don't have the money to leave the state.

"Birdie? You okay?" he asks, still able to read me like a book.

"Yeah, of course," I respond with a tight smile. He gives me a look and raises his eyebrow. I know he doesn't believe me. "Just..." I start, "I-I'm going to miss you."

"Didn't you apply there too?" he asks. I pause, but nod. Oh, why did he have to bring that up? My grades are good and I did get in, but again, I have no money. They didn't offer me a scholarship, so I can't go.

"Yeah... And I got in, but no scholarship," I sigh. "I can't afford the school with the money my brother and I are making. Alfred wouldn't be going to Boston College if it wasn't for his football scholarship."

Gilbert looks at me for a moment before he starts to laugh. Laugh? Why would he laugh? I am really confused. I mean, I expected him to sigh or pout or maybe even just accept things they way they were. Then, he pulls out a small envelope and hands it to me.

"Burger-brain told me to give this to you when I thought the time was right. It was sent a week ago." I look at him and turn it over, opening it curiously. The seal had already been broken and I can tell it had been opened before. Probably Alfred's doing. He always reads my mail. Slowly, I take out the carefully folded paper. To my surprise, it has The University of Miami's crest on the top.

I stopped short as my breath left me. Then, I broke into the biggest smile I had ever worn as I dropped the letter. "G-Gil! I-I got...! I got...!"

"A full scholarship?" Gilbert smirks. "Yup! We're gonna be college buddies! Awesome, huh?" I nod and jump into his open arms.

"B-But how?"

"Apparently, they forgot to send the scholarship with the other letter," Gilbert explained. "They heard about the Selective Mutism thing and found a scholarship fund for people with that disability." I smile even wider. He holds me in a tight hug and our lips meet, softly and happily. We break away after a moment and smile at each other as though we know a huge secret. We then pull apart and start to walk the rest of the way to our history class awkwardly pressed against each other.

Miss. K smiles as we enter. "Matthew, Gilbert, are you ready for your presentations on your countries?" she asks. Today, we have to just say a few sentences about our country. Our research project is due next week, so this is just to gives everyone an idea of where we're at.

"Yes," I nod. "I have it all ready." Gilbert flashes a thumbs up. She smiles as Gil and I take out seats.

The bell rings and Miss. K looks through her papers. "Alright, the first speaker will be Gilbert on the nation of Prussia." Gilbert stands with confidence and makes his way to the front of the room. He winks at me before starting,

"Alright, so Prussia was the most bad-ass kingdom place ever! It was, like really freaking awesome. And it sucks that it was dissolved. But I guess the world just couldn't handle the awesomeness that was Prussia!" He smiles and stands straighter to show that he is done speaking.

I really don't know what to do. I want to be a supportive boyfriend, but... I really don't know what to do. Slowly, the class starts to clap. Miss. K seems amused and goes with it, but I can't help but feel worried about what Gilbert will do with the research project.

"Uhm... Alright. Matthew? Your turn."

I stand and make my way to the front of the room. I take my notes from my folder and clear my throat. I actually am a pretty good speaker. The Speech and Debate team even asked me to join when some members heard an oral presentation I had to do for English class. I got third place in my first tournament in impromptu speaking.

"Canada is a country that not many people think about," I begin. "For instance, my brother thought it was a state." A few people laugh. "My future presentation will give a voice to one of the most invisible countries on this planet. Because everyone deserves a chance to break through the silence."

* * *

_And that, my dearest friends, is the end~_

_Time for my end of fic speech ;A;_

_First, thank you all so, so much for reading. Looking back at this fic, I can certainly see where I have improved. My writing has gotten much better especially in a style that I wasn't very good at before. Much of this fic is written in a notebook that I always carry around with me. It's my little "Writing Notebook." and I use it always. I actually have it nearly filled as of right now. So, this gave me something to do when I was bored at school xD_

_Most importantly, though, this fic helped me improve my writing which is really the reason why I'm here right now. But I couldn't have improved without all of my faithful readers and reviewers. Each and every review helped me improve just a little bit. For that, I cannot thank you guys enough. _

_Sequal? Nope. I do not see a seaqual for this one in the future. I simply don't have the time and I think I've left it an an appropriate spot. If a plot bunny does come to me, you can be sure I'll write it, though._

_Finally, I would like to say that I do not own Hetalia in any way. I just write for the fans because I love this series and want to improve my writing so I can create something one day that others will write fan fiction for. I hope you enjoyed it. Everything about it, even Prussia hijacking my chapter titles xD  
_

_This isn't the end for me, though. I will be writing much more in the future, so stay tuned! I love you all~  
_


	22. Sequel Time

_Yes, you saw it right._

_Yes, this is on the right story._

_Yes, I know this really isn't allowed, so I'll be taking it down soon_

_BUT_

_I _am_ going to do a sequel to this story. I have some basic ideas down, but I don't know which direction to take it. _

_Here's what I have:_

_Matthew becomes a therapist to children with Selective Mutism and other problems such as that. Gil still needs a job. Or he can be a bum. Whichever. I'd like him to have a job, though. Gilbird does show up eventually. And they live in Miami. _

_Here's where you guys need to help~ I wanna please you guys, so I'm taking suggestions and throwing out some other options_

_-M-preg. I will do it. I'd be more than happy to. I love m-preg. xD Problem with this is that the AU I'm doing is a more realistic AU, so it wouldn't make much sense._

_-Adoption. I LOVE throwing kids into the mix. In this plot, Matthew and Gilbert would adopt a kid with Selective Mustim (just to keep that theme going). Problem is I'd add an OC. Just a regular kid. Hopefully young enough to not be annoying and I like to think my OCs are well rounded characters.  
The OC I would use would be a young girl named Summer who is from my original book (which I am in the process of writing). Her full profile isn't complete, but I can promise she isn't annoying, stupid, or Mary Sue-ish. _

_-Other. Please give me suggestions! My email is . Or send in a review. Whichever. I must say, I am leaning more towards the adoption plot line, but I'm open to whatever you guys have to say!_

_And... To make this a little more legal, here's a small drabble~_

* * *

"Gilbert? Did you pack the blankets and clothes?"

"Yup!"

"And the kitchen plates and silverware?"

"Of course, Birdie!"

"What about the lamps and dorm furniture?"

"I got it, I got it. Geeze, Mattie, I know where everything is." I look up at my albino boyfriend and sigh before returning to the list I had made up. I think we have everything, but I can't be sure. With Gilbert, you can never be sure.

"Alright, I guess we should get going," I finally say, putting the paper in my pocket. Gilbert smiles and jumps up from where he was sitting on the building's front stairs. I can't be sure if he did what he was supposed to do because every time I would come outside, I would find him playing with his cellphone or throwing rocks or just generally slacking off.

He comes over to me and sweeps me into a hug, pressing a kiss to my lips. I squeak at the sudden action, but melt into the kiss. I wrap my arms around him and smile. "I can't wait to get to college. This is going to be amazing."

"It's gonna be awesome!" Gilbert winks. "Now, let's go, I'm starving!" He lets go of me and hops into the driver's seat. Confused, I take my place in the passenger's seat.

"Starving? We could go back in and get something to eat..." I suggest.

"Eyebrows is cooking," Gilbert scowls. "No way in hell am I eating what he makes." I can't say I don't agree, so I simply nod and we're off.

A few hours later, I climb into the back seat to pull another shirt out of my clothes box. I got mustard on my shirt and didn't want to show up to college with a stain. I dig out a pink shirt, but don't really like the style, so I put it back and pull out another. This one is pink as well and I frown, not remembering where I got a pink shirt like it. I put that one back before opening the box fully. To my surprise, every white shirt I own is pink.

"Gilbert..."

"Yeah, Birdie?"

"All my white clothes are pink now... Can you explain." Gilbert laughs nervously.

"Heh... Well, you see... The washing machine was _so_ unawesome..."

"Oh, Gilbert..."

* * *

_Don't forget to send those suggestions!_


	23. The Sequel is Up!

**_NEW STORY IS UP_**

**_NEW STORY IS UP_**

**_NEW STORY IS UP_**

"Gilbert? Did you pack the blankets and clothes?"

"Yup!"

"And the kitchen plates and silverware?"

"Of course, Birdie!"

"What about the lamps and dorm furniture?"

"I got it, I got it. Geeze, Mattie, I know where everything is." I look up at my albino boyfriend and sigh before returning to the list I had made up. I think we have everything, but I can't be sure. With Gilbert, you can never be sure.

"Alright, I guess we should get going," I finally say, putting the paper in my pocket. Gilbert smiles and jumps up from where he was sitting on the building's front stairs. I can't be sure if he did what he was supposed to do because every time I would come outside, I would find him playing with his cellphone or throwing rocks or just generally slacking off.

He comes over to me and sweeps me into a hug, pressing a kiss to my lips. I squeak at the sudden action, but melt into the kiss. I wrap my arms around him and smile. "I can't wait to get to college. This is going to be amazing."

"It's gonna be awesome!" Gilbert winks. "Now, let's go, I'm starving!" He lets go of me and hops into the driver's seat. Confused, I take my place in the passenger's seat.

"Starving? We could go back in and get something to eat..." I suggest.

"Eyebrows is cooking," Gilbert scowls. "No way in hell am I eating what he makes." I can't say I don't agree, so I simply nod and we're off.

A few hours later, I climb into the back seat to pull another shirt out of my clothes box. I got mustard on my shirt and didn't want to show up to college with a stain. I dig out a pink shirt, but don't really like the style, so I put it back and pull out another. This one is pink as well and I frown, not remembering where I got a pink shirt like it. I put that one back before opening the box fully. To my surprise, every white shirt I own is pink.

"Gilbert..."

"Yeah, Birdie?"

"All my white clothes are pink now... Can you explain." Gilbert laughs nervously.

"Heh... Well, you see... The washing machine was _so_ unawesome..."

"Oh, Gilbert..."

* * *

_Don't forget to send those suggestions!_


End file.
